To Julie . . . With Love

It saddened "Emergency!" fans everywhere to learn of Julie London's passing on October 18, 2000 . . . especially this fan. I'll never forget where I was on that day, at 7:27 P.M. (CDT). I was heading out for a walk. I'd just finished listening to one of Julie London's albums. I was only intending to check my email. There was a message in my inbox, with the subject line "Julie London Says Goodbye". Curious, I opened it first . . . and read the sad news.

I was in a state of total shock. I could only repeat "Oh, my God" over and over for about five minutes. This wasn't possible. Not Julie. This had to be a mistake. It had to be some kind of sick joke. But, no, there it was, in black and white . . . at the age of 74, Julie London had died.

I did go for that walk--I had to get out of the house. The second the door shut behind me, I burst into tears. Some might think it a bit dramatic, some might think it was getting a little too attatched . . . but those people never knew just how much Julie meant to me. Her music I adored...her acting I loved just as much. But that wasn't the extent of it. It wasn't just that she sang "Daddy"--the song I was willing to karaoke at a high school lock-in, but only because I knew I could never do "Cry Me A River" any sort of justice. It wasn't just that she brought Dixie McCall to life--a tough, strong, independent woman, a positive role model for many young women in the '70's. It wasn't just that she was one of the few actresses/singers my grandmother and I both knew enough to have an intelligent discussion about. It wasn't just that I had met a very dear friend of mine through a common interest in the woman. It was all those things and more. Don't ask me when or why or how, but I had fallen in love with Julie London. And it wasn't that sick, stalker kind of love--just pure and simple adoration.

I cried again when I returned home and found the messages from the E! fic list in my inbox, expressing sympathy and shock at the death of our beloved icon. I found that I wasn't the only one who felt a very deep and personal sense of loss. It was so lovely to be able to talk with people who understood--the best one of my friends had been able to offer was "Don't you think you're taking this a bit hard? She's just a star...". While I appreciated my friend's efforts, Julie was not "just a star". Not to her fans. Not to those who loved her.

As I write this, another tear slips down my cheek--yes, tears for a woman I had never met. A woman I had never met, but who touched my life in a special way that I can never forget. For that, I will always be grateful.

It wasn't a secret that I was a fan. I was the one who sent the somewhat infamous "Did I hear them say Gail? Her name is Gail?! I always thought it was Julie Peck . . .not Gail!" post to E!fic after watching the Jack Webb biography on A&E. I was the one who started the "Happy birthday, Julie" thread. I talked about her to my family . . . perhaps a bit much at times, in their opinion. I shrieked with delight when the autographed photo I had ordered on Ebay arrived--maybe it was addressed to a "Sue", but it was a hand-signed photo! I'll be among those missing her dearly.

My deepest sympathies are extended to her family. If any of you are, by some strange chance, reading this--I hope you know just how much she was loved by millions. Or even by one.

Maybe it's only now that Julie knows how much she was loved. I sure hope so--she deserves every bit of that love, too. Many people in this world feel as though something's missing now . . . and that something is her. I know I'm one of them. Making this page has, in a way, been theraputic. I can finally express how I truly feel. And, in a way, it makes me realize how much she will be missed. That saddens me, but there's always hope. These tribute pages, someone once told me, are not for the departed at all, but for those who live on. It's true.

Perhaps not everyone knows that October 18 also would have been (was) Bobby Troup's birthday. As someone on one of my lists said, what better birthday present than for them to have been reunited?

She sang "Cry Me A River". Many of us now are crying rivers of our own, although not for the same reason.

If we, as a group, were to write a letter to Julie, and had to keep it as short as possible, I believe it would read something like this:

To Julie--
Thanks for everything.
Love,
Your adoring fans

Yes, thank you so much for all the joy you brought to us, Julie. Thank you for the hope, the inspiration, the laughter, and the tears. Thank you more than any of us can say. Your legacy will live on. Your music and your acting will keep your memory alive.

There's a part of a poem written by a friend of mine, Ryan Scott, that I find appropriate for the situation. He didn't write it with Julie in mind, but it can apply in just about any situation in which we lose someone we loved.

I may not have been her number one fan, but I like to think of myself as somewhat close to it. And, so, it is with much love that I dedicate this page in her memory.

Rest in peace, Julie. We love you.

Audrey
10/19/00

Would you like to add your own thoughts and/or tribute? Email me at Enigma806@aol.com