Welcome everyone, to the first edition of the Royal Canadian Knight Chronicles. I am your host, Stephen Knight. Tonight, we are going to take a look back at Robomania VI, and I am going to give you my picks for wrestler of the week and match of the week. Plus, tonight, I have for all of you, a special interview with the man, the myth, the craziest bloke I've ever met, RWFC President Dav Pinnick! Anyhoo, let's get this show started.
Alright, I gotta say that my opinion of the best pay per view I've ever seen has changed as of this past Sunday. Robomania was one hell of a good show. The boys in the RWF gave it their all and really surprised me last night. All of the matches were amazing, and many of them were in contendership, but only one could be the match of the week.
After much debating, I've decided that my match of the week was Gordon A. Powell the Third and Xavier "X" Channel inside the Hell in a Cell for the Canadian Heavyweight Championship. Both of these men had some major heat going into this match. There are a lot of bad feelings between these two, and I'm sure that even after this battle, their feud isn't over by a longshot. I really enjoyed the technical display by both G.A.P. and X, these men sure know their way around a ring, and I guarantee that any match between them is a contender for match of the year. Everything was great about the match, especialy the ending...Which brings me to the wrestler of the week.
The man who shocked the RWF and Canadian fans around the country, Vanity Showwood. If I were ever really a big Owen Hart fan, I would hate Vanity right about now. But since even I thought Owen was a nugget, the interference was superbly executed by Showwood. This beer's for you Vanity.
I love the service here. And now, it's time for the interview. Welcome, Dav Pinnick
Stephen: Dav Pinnick, it's an honor to get this opportunity to interview you. Everyone knows you are the mastermind behind the RWF, the sickest, craziest, most entertaining wrestling federation this world has ever seen. My first question, for those who know little about the history of the Robotussin Wrestling Federation is, how did this all begin?"
Dav: Well, it's funny you ask that. It was so many years ago. Actually, I had did everything I kid selling Liquor. I was making great money, but I wanted something different. I had made my start as a Professional Wrestler, made a little money in that. I was "Handsome" Dav Pinnick, can you believe that?
Dav: I decided I wanted to start a wrestling federation, so I went to an underground fed that was as Hardcore as it gets. The Brutal Wrestling Federation, From there I met 4 wrestlers that I recruited for my dream the Robo Wrestling Federation. The Psychodelic Surfer, who would go on to be Skitzo Sam, Bayou Jack, Michael, and eventually a Hall of Famer. Australian Outlaw who at the time was a 9 Time World Champion, he decided better though and he did not join the R.W.F. The Dutch Destroyer, who ended up passing away shortly after. Then Shosoru Kata, another R.W.F. Hall of Famer. They were my small start, them..a russian psycho, two amateurs, and some crazy clowns. That was how this crazy fed began.
Stephen: During season seven, you dropped out of the RWF and left the company in the hands of then Vice President, Chris Pustelnik. Can you tell me why you left?
Dav: Let's just say the I.R.S. had caught onto some of the things I was hiding about the R.W.F. They couldn't get me straight up, so they tried to get me by Tax Evasion..The same way they got Capone. They didn't realize I was twice the bastard Capone was, and I had to go to Canada.
Stephen: Moving to Canada explains the reasoning behind the new locale for the RWF, but tell me Dav, why start again? Aren't you worried about the Canadian government doing the same thing to you that happened in the US?
Dav: No, for one simple reason. Canadian's don't care about themselves, why would they care about me. They're too lazy to do anything. They care absolutely about nothing.
Stephen: Kind of sounds like most Americans to tell you the truth. Just look at their bloody government
Dav: Listen motherfucker, you like your job. You best stick to interviewing, do the rough interviews with the wrestlers.
Stephen: Whoa, relax Dav. That was no insult to you mate. Let's just move on. How did your path come to cross with the Canadian Heavyweight Champion, Gordon A. Powell the Third?
Dav: Well, I needed money..and he needed someone backing him. I gave him the support, and the chance...and he backed me on restarting, I'm glad to say I've paid him back 80% of everything he gave me.
Stephen: Well, you have to be honest, you didn't really give him a chance. More like gave him the title.
Dav: No, I did nothing of the sort..I have no idea what you're talking about. Remember who gives you your paycheck
Dav: Ask me questions we need answered.
Stephen: Okay, the biggest topic going around right now is the main event at Sodomy. Where in bloody hell did you get the idea for the Flaming Vein Money match? And is that an intended pun?
Dav: Well, actually I took a little bit from each wrestlers gimmick and added it to make a great match. Flaming for Peter Gozinya of course, Vein for Vanity's crazy ass, and Money for the man who will walk away with the gold Gordon A. Powell III.
Stephen: What do you think about Vanity Showwood's recent actions on your golden boy G.A.P.?
Dav: This little punk is pissing me off, and the way he's working the loopholes in the system. What he doesn't understand is I have a little way of raising restraining orders, Money will do wonders. He'd better watch his ass Sunday.
Stephen: Hey, is that Couvossier you're drinking?
Dav: Yes sir, that's what any ladies man would drink..
Stephen: I've heard rumors recently of a big power stable forming in the RWFC. Is there any truth to that? And if so, what are your thoughts on it?
Dav: Well, I've heard rumors of that too..but I'm not sure...I'm thinking there will be a big heel turn before that happens. This is just what I'm thinking.
Stephen: Really? Who are you thinking that man will be? Remember, I have beer truth on my side.
Dav: I'm not gonna speak on that, my lips are sealed Mr. Knight. We need to go ahead and finish this up, I have things to do.
Stephen: Crikey...
Dav: WHAT! Did you call me an insect. a cricket
Stephen: No... Nevermind, I forget, you're American.
Dav: One more comment Mr. Knight, one more. I promise you, they'll never find your body. Remember, Canucks don't give a fuck.
Stephen: You don't understand an accent like mine, that's all I was saying. I mean no offense, honestly.
Dav: Alright, alright..
Dav: Well I do thank you for the interview Mr. Knight. I believe you'll be a great asset ot the Robo Wrestling Federation.
Stephen: One more question. Do you think there is anyone in the company now that can take the title away from Gordon Powell?
Dav: Man, that's a tough question. I don't know about that..I would have to say my Top 3 men are Me, Gordon A. Powell III, and "Iron Chef" Mitsukoshi Teppenyaki. So, with Iron Chef in rehab there is no worry of G.A.P. losing the title.
Stephen: That's it for this week, I've got money burning a hole in my pocket, so I must be going. See you next week!