Chocolate

REASONS CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN A MAN

20) With Chocolate size doesn't matter.
19) When you have Chocolate it does not keep your neighbors awake.
18) You are never too young or too old for Chocolate.
17) You can have as many kinds of Chocolate as you can handle.



16) Good Chocolate is easy to find.
15) You can have Chocolate at any time of the month.
14) Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant.


13) With Chocolate there's no need to fake it.
12) You don't get hairs in your mouth with Chocolate.
11) You can ask a stranger for Chocolate without getting your face slapped.


10) You can have Chocolate on top of your desk without upsetting your co-workers.
9) The word "commitment" doesn't scare off Chocolate.
8) Two people of the same sex can have Chocolate without being called nasty names.

7) If you bite the nuts too hard the Chocolate won't mind.
6) You can have Chocolate even in front of your mother.
5) You can make Chocolate last as long as you want it to.


4) You can safely have Chocolate while you are driving.
3) Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.
2) "If you love me you'll swallow that" has real meaning with Chocolate.


1) You can GET Chocolate.


"The Rules of Chocolate"

1. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

2. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

3. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution is simple: Eat it in the parking lot.

4. Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite, and you'll eat less.

5. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

6. If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

7. Money talks. Chocolate sings. Beautifully.

8. Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

9. Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous? A. Because no one wants to quit.

10. Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

11. A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

12. If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?



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Links

Here is where I picked up the Man background...
''Rules'' of Chocolate
Good reasons to Diet.

Email: carnyvalpearlbuttons@hotmail.com