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Poem Without a Name

You came into my life and woke me
from a dream of hopeless despair.

Never had I known such love. It was
as if we were created to be together.

Our bodies fit together as did our souls.
    I gazed into your eyes and I saw the world there.   

I found myself there. As we wrapped ourselves
around each other and explored the coming
together of our totality I became a woman

...a person...all that I could be. You cherished me.

I had not been cherished before.

I became beautiful through your eyes.
In my eyes you were the fulfillment
of all I had ever dreamed of having.

I was finally complete.
Our love was all that
I needed to fill my soul.

My hand on your head brought you peace.
Your head laying sleeping on my lap as
    I gazed at the sunset brought complete contentment.   

You showed me how to be in love.
It was sublime.
I was finally safe.

I waited all my life for you my love.
I never expected to find you.
I wanted to crawl inside of you
and stay there forever.

Where did you go?
Why did we leave eachother?
What happened to us?

Why is it that the only thing
that ever brought me contentment is gone?

Why were we brought together
only to be torn apart?

My heart aches for you.

My life is empty without you.
I miss my lover,
my friend,
my soul mate.

I am certain that
when I close my eyes
for the last time
it will be your face

I see and your arms I reach for.

I will never be in love again.
Nothing can fill that place for me.

That is the place where you dwell
inside me and I don't wish to fill that place again.

My love.
My heart and soul.
The meaning in this life is gone now and
I don't understand how that can be.

Please God!

You brought us together
let us be together in another life,
another place.

My soul will never rest
while it is separate from his.

© January, 2000, by

My Loves

        I love them both
        How can that be?

        One woke me from a long slumber
        The other shares my dreams.

        One is like a storm that swept me up
        and pulled me into the eye.
        The other is the eye of the storm.
        He makes me feel calm and at peace.

        One touched my soul and holds it in his grasp.
        The other gave me his soul to hold for safekeeping.

        I would not have been able to love one
        without having known the love of the other.

        How can I love them both?
        How can I not.
        They are a blessing born out of love.

        © January, 2000, by

Is This What Love Is?
-- by

Is this what love is?

All consuming emotions. Soul Mates.
Time away from them is torture.
Their touch fills me.
I want to crawl inside them and stay there.
Not being at ease when they are not near.
Feeling what they feel in place of what I feel.
Jealousy towards anyone and anything that takes
my place in their site.
Not being able to breath unless they are near.
Waiting for the sound of their voice, the smell
of them, the site of them so that I can be whole.
Desire beyond gratification. Losing myself in them.

I used to call this love. Now I wonder.
The torrent of love was ragged and unsettling
and even torturous at times.

Or can love be simply this...

Sitting quietly near someone and feeling at ease.
Laughing when something makes them laugh.
Feelings of quiet relaxation when I am with them.
Not caring if they go out on their own.
Knowing they will come back.
            Not having to be someone else when I am with them.           
Cooking and doing the dishes together.
Walking together and laughing about nothing.
Simple acts of consideration.
The sound of their voice quiets my mind.
Their look soothes me.
Knowing that they cherish me
without constantly being told.
Holding each other while we sleep.

Finding that these things allow me to honor myself
and at the same time bring me a sense of
safety and joy that I have never felt before.

I ask again is this what love is?

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Since February 08, 2000

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