John: We know almost nothing about the Tavloids-
Aeryn: Tavleks.
John: Whatever. What we do know if they're willing to pay us to haul cargo, which they're not going to to if you go in there doing your John Wayne impression.
Aeryn: John Wayne, who's that? A relative?
John: John Wayne. The big guy. True Grit. Searchers, the Cowboys, Ginghis Khan... Forget about Ginghis Khan, everone has a bad movie. The point is-
Aeryn: No, the point is, I'm not going to meet that shuttle unarmed. Simple as that.
John: Kung fu! Kung fu never carried a gun!
Rygel: I need them to look up to me.
D'Argo: Why? We don't.
Rygel: Well, you should!
Zhaan: Am I the only species in creation that doesn't thrive on conflict?
D'Argo: All of you, shut up!
Rygel: That's right. Shut up. Now the Tavleks believe-
D'Argo: Shut up includes you.
Rygel: If you must address me, do so as Your Supreme Eminence. Which you should be doing anyway.
John: Our Supreme Eminence has been bagged.
John: Pilot, get a tractor beam on that shuttle.
Pilot: Tractor beam? What's that?
John: Graviton shield, tracto ray, Super Glue, whatever you yanked me aboard with.
John: He's not good at listening, is he?
Zhaan: Don't be afraid, we won't hurt you.
Aeryn: Speak for yourself.
John: Stimulant? That's a little more than cappucino, pal. Our friend just tried to kill us!
Aeryn: If you're unconscious in battle you don't want the enemy cutting your arm off to get your weapon.
John: Can be disarmed without having to be disarmed.
Pilot: Was that necessary?
D'Argo: It felt good.
Pilot: D'Argo's getting angrier. Do something.
John: This way!
Aeryn: Oh, was that another suggestion of yours?
Zhaan: Soft, yes. Weak, no.
Pilot: Crichton has a plan.
Zhaan: Did you say Crichton? (Delvian expletives)
Aeryn: That was your plan?
John: Yeah. Pretty good.
Aeryn: Oh, barely! That is the last time I go along with one of your plans.
John: Fine. Next time you get to make the plan.
Aeryn: I'm going to kill him.
Aeryn: I'll torture him, then I'll kill him.
Aeryn: I've got a plan.
John: Please, let me guess. Your plan. Jam down to the planet, conduct a commando-style raid against what, a couple dozen heavily-armed Tavloids and haul ass back to the ship.
Aeryn: Tavleks.
John: That's your plan? Wile E. Coyote would come up with a better plan than that! You're just going to go down there by yourself?
Aeryn: Of course not. You're coming with me.
John: In your dreams I'm coming with you!
John: We could try negotiating with the Tavloids-
(Pantac jab)
Aeryn: Tavleks!
John: Next time you hit me, make sure I don't wake up.
(Aeryn does that tongue cluck)
John: Oh, don't (cluck) me!
John: This isn't over. And when it is, you and I are gonna sit down and have a serious talk.
Aeryn: Sure. And when this is over, you and I will probably be dead.
Zhaan: Is nudity a taboo in your culture? Are you ashamed of your bodies?
Tavlek: Well, we would be if we looked like you.
Zhaan: I doubt it.
John: You Shang-haied my ass down here, and now you want me to leave? Give me one good reason.
Aeryn: Lots of reasons. Land mines, fire snakes, razor grass, night vision snipers, mordian death spiders...
Zhaan: He insists on helping us with the sensors, despite his fatigue.
D'Argo: Only because you'll do it wrong.
Aeryn: Enjoying yourself?
John: Oh yeah. Marching through a smelly, bug-infested jungle. If this is your idea of a good time, I bet you don't get a lot of second dates.
Tavlek: I don't want your help!
Zhaan: You're in no condition to choose.
John: Nice blanket you got there, D'Argo.
D'Argo: A lumpy blanket. Get her off.
D'Argo: I meant everything I said.
Aeryn: So did I.
John: Did you mean everything you did? You attacked us, tried to take over the ship. And you you're ready to slaughter every Tavloid we-
D'Argo and Aeryn: Tavlek.
John: Whatever. If the gauntlet brings out the real you, both of you, think long and hard about therapy. I'm going to go check things out, play nice while I'm gone.
Rygel: I was deposed over a hundred cycles ago! Ransom me if you want, but all you get is me.
John: Hey, check out the critter!
Trou dominar: Critter?
D'Argo: Critter?
Aeryn: That's how you create a diversion.
Zhaan: I could rip you apart right now, Kahlaan help me, I'd enjoy it. But you know why I won't? Because we're not enemies. This is your enemy!
Bekesh: You didn't kill them!
John: I guess I'm not that kind of guy.
John: You don't want Rygel anyway.
Bekesh: Why don't I?
John: Because... he's not really a king.
Rygel: I'm not?
Bekesh: He's not?
John: He's... an escaped mental patient. Believes he's royalty.
Rygel: You're the mental patient if you expect anybody to believe that-
(kick)
Bekesh: He's not insane.
Rygel: I could be.
John: No, he's not insane. But he is sick.
(Rygel coughs)
John: He's very sick, very contagious. You ever hear of chicken pox?
Bekesh: He's not sick.
John: Okay, he's not sick. But he is worthless.
John: Rygel is an obnoxious gasbag, and who's gonna shell out for that?
Rygel: He's right. I'm unloved, unwanted, unpopular (Kick), unconscious...
Rygel: Which means you're going to have to take me back as I am, or disembowel me here.
John: Don't you tempt me, Fluffy.
D'Argo: Am I to live or die?
Aeryn: Die. But not today.
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