by Natalie Williams
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Farscape in the slightest, unless we're talking about Rose, who is most definitely mine.
RATING: PG, for language.
ARCHIVING: If you've got the other Rosefics, sure, why not? Just tell me.
SUMMARY: Prequel to Bedtime Story- John and Aeryn on their first night without Rose.
*****
I know I'm not getting to sleep, but it seems like even if I could, Aeryn wouldn't let me. "You can stop moving around," I tell her. "I know you're awake."
"It's too quiet," Aeryn says.
I definitely agree with that. "We're supposed to be enjoying the silence, right?" I say. "I mean, we're getting her back in the morning, and we know she's fine."
"Exactly," she agrees.
We both lapse into silence, but after a minute or two, neither of us are any more comforted. "We could always check on her," I suggest.
For a second Aeryn looks really tempted. "We can't," she says finally, but doesn't sound too decisive. "We'll have to go through this sooner or later. It's better we just do this now."
Right. As long as we both keep telling ourselves- and each other- that. "Yeah. She's with Zhaan. We know everything's fine. And it's only a few more arns. We made it this long."
Another pause. God, this is torture! We're both so attached to Rose, so used to her being there. She's always doing something or making some noise or getting into some kind of trouble that we have to go fix. And when Zhaan offered to babysit overnight, it seemed cool. This was supposed to be Quality Time for me and Aeryn. And maybe, just maybe, at least one of us could sleep through the night.
Yeah. No such luck.
"I think she's trying to crawl," Aeryn says, interrupting the silence.
I look over at her. "Why do you think that?"
"She can push herself up, and she tries to move. She just can't coordinate herself to move both her feet and arms at the same time without falling."
You know, I have no idea what age babies usually start crawling. She could be starting early, it could be late, I don't know. If my life depended on that knowledge, I doubt I'd stand a chance. But I think at any age, it would be way too early for your kid to be crawling. Next thing you know she'll be walking and talking and driving... Woah, getting ahead of myself.
I shake myself out of it. "I haven't seen her do that yet," I say.
"I didn't either before today. Yesterday. Whenever it was. D'Argo caught her trying to do it. If he hadn't pointed it out I think I would have missed it entirely," she explains.
And right then I'm smacked upside the head by a thought: "We are such parents."
Aeryn rolls over onto her side to face me, raising her eyebrows. "You needed to be told that?"
"No, I mean... We spend all day watching over Rose, and we get all stressed out. And the first night we have alone, we spend it talking about all the cute things she did today."
"She's taken over our lives," Aeryn agrees. "I don't think that's a bad thing."
"No, I'm just realizing that I turned into the kind of person I never thought I'd turn into." Here's hoping my face isn't twisted into the grimace I think it is, because I really don't want her to call me on it. Maybe you can understand- I had friends who went off and had kids, and then all they could talk about afterwards were those kids. Which, if you don't have kids, can be on the top ten most annoying things ever.
Yet here I am...
"John," Aeryn says, "what else is there? Would you rather we discuss how Rygel managed to annoy everyone nearly to the point of violence, or if the DRD's were able to clean the grease spill in the maintenance bay?"
She's got a point, and I won't hide that from her. "You've got me there."
She props herself up on one elbow. "If our complete boredom otherwise isn't enough to convince you, just remember that it's me telling you this."
Ooh, that's the winning shot. When I think back to the old Aeryn, the one I met when I first wound up out here, she never would have been involved in this conversation. I've got to give the girl credit, she's come a long way. "Okay, okay, I give up. You win," I tell her, smiling.
"I knew that already," Aeryn says, smiling.
I'm not exactly what synapse in my brain turns the conversation this way, but too bad, it's turning. "Did you ever think, in your wildest dreams, that you would be here right now, one half of a probably over-involved parenting team of a four-month-old baby?" I ask her.
"No," she answers immediately. "But I think that goes without saying."
"Are you happy?" I think I know the answer, and I'm not quite sure of why I even asked it, but I want to hear her say it.
"You know I am." This answer is also immediately, and I can tell it's genuine.
I can't help but smile. "Good. Just the answer I wanted to hear," I say. "And you know, I think we just went a whole ten seconds without mentioning Rose."
"And you just ruined our streak," Aeryn says.
"Damn."
"Neither of us are getting any sleep tonight," she says, as if she just realized it.
"Nope," I say, just before kissing her.
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