Working at McDonald's
By: Mako

Backstory- Time... is a fickle mistress. She moves in inscrutable ways- and her form- in constant motion. No one knows whether it was the bizarre quantum fluctuations that day, or the faint, but distinct, smell of fresh hemp from Quickstrike's room... but the effect was the same. Like a midsummer night's dream, events folded and the past did not occur.

This is (not) the Twilight Zone....

The Time- 1999

The Place- upstate New York .......

Thomas' log-
June 5
"I've been having the dreams again. Like I'm supposed to be living another life, or something... I... I just don't know. It bothers me, but I must move on. I got a job at MacDonalds today as the manager. The pay's better than at Wendy's and I've got the experience, but the staff are... well, odd.

Deep Frier- Mohammed Alferno
Burger Duty- Chet Torr
Counter- Quinn Strike and Beth Arahnia
Janitor- Vaspo Nater

June 6

I can't believe this. My first day on the job, and things were already a mess. First I caught Alferno burning things in the frier-

Me: Alferno, what the hell r u doing? What are those leaves doing in there!?

Alferno: Frying, my Manager.

Me: Damn it! You're spilling burning oil everywhere! Do something!

Alferno: Yes, your majesty.

Me: Damnit, No! NO! I told you earlier today not to drink the fryer oil!

Alferno: But I was...thirsty...

Me: I can't believe you sometimes... just... no no don't spit the grease back in the fryer! don't drink it again! ...err argh!

Alferno: ?

Me: Its worthless now! Throw it out!


Alferno: Immediately.

Me: No! Not HERE! AGHHH!!!

Alferno: Hehhehheh. Burn, floor, Burn!

Me: Damn it! Vaspso! get Vaspso! he'll clean this stuff up!"

Alferno walks up to Vaspo Nater.

"The Manager calls for you."

"Vwy Nator always have to clean up mess?"

"Because the manager commands it!"

"Vwy universe zso cruel to Vaspso Nater?"

...Who, by the way, I suspect to be an illegal immigrant. There's something about him... all of them...

June 7

What I saw at the counter-

Customer: Ok, here's a 5 dollar bill.

Quinn: Sank you kindly, stranger.

-shoves the dollar in his pocket-

Customer: Umm.. no that pays for the food.

Quinn: ?

Customer: You know, the food I ordered...

Quinn: uhhhh....

-scratches his head-

Customer: You idiot! Ugh, nevermind...just give me my change.

Quinn: Sure thang.

-gives him the 5 dollars back-

Customer: No, I gave you this to you to...uhh thanks!

Quinn: Come again, ya'll.

Customer #2: I would like a Big Mac with cheese, but no onions, fries on the side, and a small Coke.

Quinn: Awlright. a Sandmitch.

Customer #2: No, I want a Big Mac with cheese, no onions, fries on the side, and a small Coke.

Quinn: Big what?

Customer #2: Big Mac.

Quinn: Nope. the name's Quin, Quinn Strike. Let's you and me tussle!

He actually started shooting mustard at the customer. Needless to say, I had a good long talk with him.

June 7

This nice couple came in around two, but, of course, things got screwed up.

-Sean Bolt and Ann Rasor walk in-

Bolt: We'll have two specials, m'lady... and we'll share a large drink.

-Ann leaves to get a table-

Arachnia: I see you've got a girlfriend.

Bolt: Why, yes. I do.

Arachnia: She putting out?


Arachnia: Well, an attractive man like you, I'm sure we all know the answer...

Bolt: Uh, yes. Of course.

Arachnia: Out back, three o clock?

Bolt, glancing back: Make it two thirty.

I couldn't believe what I was listening in on! And just after, a mister Tiga Lee came in...

Tiga: I need to speak to Chet.

-Chet takes the counter-

Chet: What up, Tiga?

Tiga: I need da digs man.

Chet: Cool, be cool. I get it.

Tiga: You betta, man.

Chet: Two thirty today, big scat man gonna get da goods. Out back- I got it all set up.

Tiga: Then be cool, Little man.

Around two thirty a lot of police came, but few bought any food. And with Chet under arrest, and with Arachnia's new affair, I had to replace them. It wasn't easy, but I found a guy named Quintin Tarantellus...

June 8

Customer: uhh, hmm... I would like to order the... uh...

Quintin: Hurry up already you insolent fool!

Customer: geez, I would like the Arch Deluxe meal.

Quintin: Alright that will be 7.99, please pull up to the service window... damn I hate this job.

Customer: Can I have some extra BBQ sauce with that, too?

Quintin: No.

Customer: No? but I...

Quintin: Dammit you greedy fool, your presence is annoying me!

Customer: but I just..

Quintin: Well I just wanted to rule the world but those damn aliens stopped me! I'll never forget what they did to me.... sending me into this miserable timeline, this miserable, human, body! They shall dearly pay for the pain they bestowed upon me! What's that, you ask? Money... and power... heheheh....

-The customer drives off quickly while Tarantellus talks to himself-

June 10

Store closed. Mainly for two reasons. One- lack of surviving repeat customers. Two- A grease fire burnt the place down yesterday. The words "Burn baby, Burn" were scratched into the store post, and Alferno hasn't was seen crossing into Massachusetts... God help Boston Market...