Interview With a Maximal
By: Mako

Mako here with my next interview, by popular demand, Optimus Optimal. We here in Cale City Park, Lower East Cybertron.

Mako: "Glad you could make it Optimus."

Op: "Yeah."

Mako: "So, now that Beast Wars is over, what are your immediate plans?"

"Nothin really."

"What about Beast Machines?"

"Oh yeah. That."

"Well, ok then, what about your character in BW... did you enjoy the part? What of the REAL Optimus did you take into the role?"

"Huh? Well, uh, it all seemed ok to me."



"Ok... What about Beast Machines then? Where do you see this role leading to?"

"leading to?"

"What were your impressions of the show... having, you know, starred in it and all?"

"ok I guess."

"grr... No, I MEAN, what insights can you give us into this show, being naturally surrounded by speculation and rumor?"

"Nothin much ta say. Ok, I guess."

"ok, ok, ok... let's change the topic."


"Optimus, recently you have been charged with indecent behavior and recklessness... what is your side of these events?"

"Well, uh, I went inta a bar, ok, and some guy goes up ta me an says like, 'ya loser maximalzzz can't drink' er somethin', so I says, 'sez who?' and he goes 'sez me, lozer' and I said, 'we gonna see bout that' and we got a few drinks, ya see, and so I was, uh, winning or something and he says, 'damn maximals all lozers' so I gave heem a blow right ta the mouth and he #^&*ing upchucks on my shirt and dis guy goes, 'time ta fight!' I, uh, the rest is a blurr. I woke up a few hours later in the women's room covered in lip stick."

"I... see."

"Eah, it was a crazy night, man, I tell ya."

"Well, lets try for some background information... you grew up here in Cale City, right?"

"Yeah, up on 78th."

"Tough neighborhood. How did you get from the, pardon the term, ghetto, to show biz? What was the catalyst for your development into an actor?"

"Drugs, man."


"Drugs. Dey get mighty expensive, see, so I needed some slips da buy some, afore I kicked, and dere was some actin' place round on 67, and I went there. I think. I don't remember much from back then."

"Well, time to close up. Are you working on any other projects besides Beast Machines?"

"uh, no."

"Ok, Airazor or Blackarachnia?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know..."

"No, I don't."

"Ok, never mind. Purple or Green?"


"Preferred color. You know."


"It's like a psychological analysis thing."

"Like hypnot'ysm?"

"... no."

"Oh, uh, green I suppose."

"Good, Thank you," deep breaths, "Anyway, thanks for the interview Optimus."