Hanson Fanatic

CHAPTER 11

The early morning sun had the same effect on Quick’s eyes as a squirt of lemon juice.

“Ugh! They’ve dropped the bomb. I can see the flash,” he said groggily. “X... shut the door, man.”

It took him almost a minute, in his sleepy state, to realize what he had said. X had opened the door to their motel.

“X....” he asked to the empty room.

Quick rolled over and saw that, as he suspected, he was alone. There was a note on X’s bed, another stupid note! He walked over and grabbed it. The note read, “Had to get out.”

Quick threw on his clothes as fast as he could. Although there hadn’t been much snow the night before, it was still pretty cold outside. He spotted X in a matter of moments, jogging away from the hotel. Quick sprinted after him as fast as he could.

“Good thing he didn’t have too much of a head start,” Quick thought. “He’s going really fast. I can’t believe he’s leaving! He’s not going to let us take him to the sanitarium to get help. He’s going to abandon us. He’s running out on me,”

Quick ran after his roommate, yelling for him to stop. After a about a hundred yards or so, he caught up enough for X to hear. He stopped and turned to face Quick.

“Nice. Dressed already? And sneakers too. They should help with the fast getaways,” Quick said, catching his breath.

X looked at him as though the didn’t know what Quick was talking about. He explained that he was just out for a jog. X was dressed in jogging clothes, but Quick didn’t know if it was just for effect.

Quick continued, “Sure you are. Boy, do I know how to pick them. I thought I knew you. I thought that you were a decent, stand up sort of guy. I thought that you were the last great guy on Earth. I thought that you and I could..... Forget all that. I don’t even know you!”

“That makes two of us then. I don’t know me either,” X answered. “I’ve been laying in bed awake for hours, thinking about what we have to do today. How I have to go to.... How I have to go to the hospital. This might be the last chance I have at freedom, Quick. I wanted to jog in the open air one more time, ok?”

“And, you were going to come back when you were done?” Quick asked.

X assured him that he was.

“Good,” Quick said, “Because I stuck my neck out for you. If you disappear, I’m the one in the hot seat. You’ve got to go to the hospital today, X. Do it for me. Do it for yourself. Will do you me a favor? Will you promise me that you will try? It’s for your own good.”

“I promise,” X said.

He turned and walked towards their motel, resigned to his fate.

Quick’s cheeks were flush from the cold, from running, from anger. “Why am I having such a hard time believing him?” he thought. “Why has so much doubt entered my mind?”

________________________

If I would have known that X had been awake, I would have kept him company.

I had laid there for hours as well, afraid to go back to sleep. I was afraid to dream the dreams - make that nightmares - that I couldn’t escape.

Taylor rolled over and kissed me good morning. His kisses are sweet, and soft. I could feel his full lips, and even his teeth just on the other side. His kisses are warm and comforting. I tried to savor every sensation of it, as though it might be my last.

“Jax, what’s wrong? You’re very quiet today,” Taylor asked.

“Oh, um, nothing’s wrong, Taylor. I just felt like being quiet, I guess. That’s all.”

He gave me that disapproving look again. It really is hard to hide things from him.

“You’d tell me if there was something really wrong? Right?” he asked.

“Who else would I tell?” I countered.

I mentioned to Taylor that Quick and X were back. I had seen them return from the police station the night before, after Taylor had gone to bed. I told him that Quick mentioned that the police wanted to take X to a hospital to check him out. Maybe they could help with his amnesia. Taylor seemed to think it was a good idea, and that maybe they could help him. I told Tay that X didn’t seem to share his enthusiasm. He seemed more like a condemned man whenever we mentioned going to a hospital.

I also suggested that we accompany X and Quick to the hospital for moral support. I didn’t’ tell Taylor but it was actually a two-part plan. We would help X, but I thought that maybe I could also talk to one of the doctors there about the nightmares plaguing me.

_________________________

The police car showed up on time to drive X to the hospital. The car ride was a pretty quiet one. We left word for Zac and Toby where the four of us were going. X and Quick barely spoke and when they did, the air was full of tension. Something was bothering both of them. Taylor broke the silence. He always seems to know the right thing to say.

“This might be a blessing in disguise. Maybe they can help you get your memory back. Whatever help you need, I’m happy to be there for you,” Taylor said. “X, no one actually thinks you had anything to do with anything, you know.”

“I just.... I can’t explain it but I hate hospitals,” X said quietly. “Detective Piper thinks that maybe I have something to do with everything. I don’t know. Maybe I did. He’s a real detective you know.”

“He’s not a real detective,” Quick said, breaking his own vow of silence. “Columbo, now there was a detective. He solved a crime every week, and never once had to harass helpless teenagers. Piper’s no detective. He’s just a civil servant.”

Quick said the last part loud enough for the officers in the front of the police car to hear. I think the anger Quick felt towards Piper was making him forget whatever tension that developed between he and X. Quick wanted to protect X more than any of us, and having a common enemy like Piper pulled the two of them closer together.

“You’ll be alright,” Quick said, taking X’s hand. “What’s the worst that can happen? They’ll find out you did it and give you the gas chamber. Which, when you think about it is better than the electric chair because they shave your head for that.”

__________________________

The ‘sanitarium’ as Piper called it, turned out to be more of a rest home near the outskirts of town. There wasn’t a shock treatment or deranged psycho in sight. We met with Dr. Peter Chalmers, a social service worker. He seemed like a nice guy, big round face and an even bigger smile. I think the relaxed atmosphere calmed X down a bit.

Dr. Chalmers turned X over to the custody of one of the psychiatrists for evaluation. He didn’t seem to think that it would be any big deal. As open and amiable as Dr. Chalmers seemed though, the psychiatrist seemed the opposite. The psychiatrist seemed like a nervous, odd man. Still, I’m sure he would be ok.

Taylor wanted to talk to the admission nurse and assure her that if there were any expenses, he would be glad to pay them.

I took advantage of this distraction and spoke with Dr. Chalmers.

“Doctor, mind if I tag along?” I asked

“Sure, as long as you don’t mind my looking in on a couple of patients as we go. These days a psychiatrist’s couch has to have wheels. What’s up?” he asked, as we walked down the hall.

“It’s sort of dumb, when I think about it. But, I’m afraid to go to sleep. I think I’m cracking up. I mean it. How long can a person go without sleep?”

“Two weeks, but you gotta keep dancing.”

Despite the heaviness I felt, I laughed. Dr. Chalmers had a way of opening you up, I guess. Although he seemed like the talk was no big deal, I could tell that he was really listening. It felt good to finally have someone to talk to about my problems. So good, in fact, that I think I talked too much. The floodgates were opened, and the words poured from my mouth.

I continued. “I’m afraid to lay down at night. I’m scared sick, afraid to close my eyes. Why do I have these terrible nightmares? In my dreams, I see my father as clearly as I see you. He’s been dead for years, and yet there he is. I see other things too. Dangerous things. People getting killed and stuff. Then I roll over and everything’s ok. I’m being attacked from inside. How do I defend myself from myself? If this keeps up everyone will realize that I’m as crazy as I know I am. What do you think?”

“I think I should sit down,” Dr. Chalmers said.

He found a bench in the hall and asked me to sit with him.

“So, you’ve been having dreams,” he said, “Dreams are a powerful thing sometimes, but other times they’re just dreams. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Other times, though, dreams are a clue to our inner fears or desires. Dreams can give us tools but it’s up to the dreamer to use those tools. What do you think the dreams mean?”

I thought hard.

“Alot of things happen in the dreams, but one of the main things is that I die. I come to an end. I’m no more. That’s it? That something comes to an end maybe?”

“That could be it. You’re afraid of part of your life ending. Have you started on a new expedition in life? Are you afraid of part of it ending? You also mentioned that your father is in the dreams. What’s he doing in there?”

“He’s talking to me. He’s telling me how much he loves me, and that he will always love me no matter what.”

The doctor smiled at me again. “He will always love you, no matter what. Are you afraid that you’ve done something that would make your parents stop loving you? Could that be it? Could you have started a new phase of your life, and now you’re afraid of another phase ending and that your parents would stop loving you?”

I nodded, understanding what he meant and said, “What about the rest of my dream? They start out ok but they end in disaster. Am I crazy?”

“No,” he answered definitively. “A bit confused maybe. Crazy people never ask if they’re crazy. That’s how you can tell that you’re not. If you were crazy, you would probably sleep like a baby. Your life is in flux right now, but when that ends, so will your nightmares.”

“It’s the ‘ending’ part that worries me sometimes, Doc. I know it’s silly but you did say that dreams are sometimes tools. Sometimes mine are predictions to my future. I just feel...... what if one person, just one, can save another from destruction? Wouldn’t that be worth any price?”

The doctor said to me, “You will be fine, son. We all do what we can. Some more, some less. Have you spoken to the people you love? They’re better than any medical doctor, I can assure you.”

Taylor came over and I had to cut our “session” short. Still, it made me feel alot better. Maybe my dreams weren’t as heavy as I thought. Talking to the doctor, and seeing Taylor were the best medications I could have.

We walked outside to wait for X and Quick in the garden. I even stole a kiss from Tay, when I thought no one was looking. I couldn’t tell him about what I dreamed yet, but maybe I would later. The doctor was right, maybe talking to the people you love is all you need to solve your problems.

_________________

X sat nervously in the second story office of Dr. Regulous. He swung his feet from side to side. Quick paced back and forth behind him, hoping the doctor would come into the room and get this all over with.

The room was stuffy. Books were stacked on shelves from floor to ceiling. Heavy curtains hung from the wall, seeming to block out most of the light and the air. Floor lamps were placed sparingly around the room. One of them near X. It reminded him of the interrogation room at the police station, but he was convinced to go through with this. No matter how much it spooked him, he had promised Quick to try.

Dr. Regulous entered. He was a nervous, twitchy sort of man. He checked over his charts and sat down at his enormous desk, staring silently at X for a few moments.

“It says on your forms that you can’t remember who you are,” he said finally.

“I... I... Y-yes, Sir,” X stammered.

“Do you also have a problem with stuttering, young man?” the doctor asked.

X told him that he did not.

The doctor wasn’t really that bad. But, he did lack the bedside manner Dr. Chalmers had.

“What can you remember from your past?” the doctor asked.

“One of the few things I can remember is that I was in love with someone. There was someone I loved more than anything. When I think back, I get this sort of funny feeling mixed with love. I can sort of remember losing them somehow, and when I lost them I lost myself. I can’t remember anything before that.”

“And, what would you like the most? What do you hope to discover when we unlock this past of yours?”

X was quiet for a moment, then spoke, “Well, if I’m suppose to tell you anything that I want, I guess that would be that I want to find someone. Someone who’s every move is magic. Someone who can make me forget my fears with everything they do. Someone who can make me feel complete again. I just want some of that magic I always hear about.”

The doctor sat back in his musky, dank chair. He put his fingers to his temples and closed his eyes.

He said, “Let me tell you something. A secret that will make your life so much better. Love is entirely unnecessary. This ‘love myth’ is an impediment to your recovery. No one ever lost their memory because they lost their love, dear boy. Our belief that love is some ‘cure-all’.... you might as well be waiting for the Toothfairy to come and save you. Some sick people prioritize being in love above success, above personal growth, above health! If you want to get healthy again, you’ll have to give up your silly ideas.”

Quick couldn’t take any more. He rose from his seat near the back of the office and spoke.

“Doctor, do you really think that’s the answer? To have X just give up?” he asked.

“I believe that what is holding your friend back from remembering are his preconceived notions of a lost love. We need to separate that from the true psychological problems.”

“You can’t be serious.” Quick added, placing his hand on X’s shoulder. “His love was all X had to cling to at one time. He can’t ignore it. We’ve got hearts in here, Doctor, not sno-cones.”

“I am fully aware of the human anatomy, young man,” The doctor said. “You are clearly the biggest advocate of ‘love medication’. You must have some tale to tell us about a girlfriend of yours.”

Quick was suddenly dumbstruck. He squeaked out, “I...uh...don’t have a girlfriend.”

“Really? Hmm. You’ve never been in love? You argue so eloquently for something you’ve never felt. You’ve lived your whole life without it, and you seem satisfied. So, I ask you again, why is it so necessary?”

Quick looked out of the window and saw Jaxsper sneaking a kiss from Taylor. There he had seen the healing power of love. He wanted to tell the doctor that. He didn’t have to. He turned to realize that the doctor was standing behind him. Quick wondered how much the doctor had seen.

“I... I see,” the doctor said. “Maybe we all need some perspective here. This might be a more difficult psychological problem than I thought. I would like to keep Mr...X here over night for evaluation.”

Quick wanted to stay as well, but the doctor said that it would limit his progress. X, though worried about the confinement, was determined to live up to his promise to Quick. He agreed to allow himself to remain in the hospital overnight. Quick let him know that he would be back first thing in the morning again.

The boys left the room to say their good-byes and complete their paperwork.

The doctor scribbled notes in X’s files. He wrote,
“Boys loving other boys. Filthy business. Patient needs intense psychological help.”

CHAPTER 12

Toby crouched slightly behind a tree in the courtyard of the motel. He looked around to make sure that no one was watching and pulled a small, yellow walkie-talkie from his pocket.

He pushed the “talk” button and asked, “Do you see anything yet?”

There was silence.

He repeated what he said, this time a louder.

“Do you see anything yet?”

The walkie-talkie remained silent. Toby made sure it was turned on, and spoke a final time. This time, he raised his voice as much as possible without, he hoped, giving himself away.

“I say! Do you see anything?”

There was a second more of silence before Zac’s voice came back.

“You’re supposed to say, ‘over’,” Zac scolded.

“What?” Toby asked, turning the volume up on his walkie-talkie.

“I said,” Zac’s voice intoned, “you are supposed to say ‘over’ when you’re finished. Over.”

Toby sighed and kicked some of last night’s snow from his boots. Snowfall began at exactly 3:12 am and ended this morning at 6:49 am. Toby knew this because he stayed awake all night, peeking out of the window approximately every 20 minutes. Maybe it was because two men had been murdered. Or, maybe it was because of the fake fire on the train that forced Toby and his friends to take up refuge at this snowy motel. Maybe it was because Toby was convinced that he saw some menacing figure staring at their motel rooms last night. When things like that happened, normal people don’t go to sleep afterwards. Toby was a little grumpy this morning. Zac, of course, slept like a baby.

“Do you see anything yet?” Toby asked, then quickly added, “Over.”

“No. Nothing. Just stay behind that tree, and I’ll keep pretending to sit here and read the newspaper. Over.”

Zac pulled a small pair of binoculars from behind the newspaper and surveyed the area. He sat on a bench on one side of the courtyard, while Toby crouched behind a tree at the other side. Zac saw nothing and quickly stuffed the binoculars back into their hiding place.

Toby’s voice crackled over the walkie-talkie again.

He said, “How long do you expect we’ll have to keep this up? Over.”

“As long as it takes. If you’re right, and you really did see someone outside of our room last night, that probably means that this isn’t over yet. Over. Oh wait! I’m not done yet. No-Over! The thing is, if it was the killer last night, I bet he doesn’t know that we’re onto him. He thinks he’s got us bamboozled. He doesn't know that we know, you know? That’s why we’re out here, doing this little recreational peek-a-boo. To catch him. Now-Over.”

“We’ve been out here almost an hour now, and I’m starting to get a cramp from crouching behind this tree,” Toby said. “What say we change places? Over.”

“And blow our cover? Never. This is a stake out. We’re suppose to remain in our positions and watch. Besides, I thought you liked to watch. You liked watching last night when I pulled down my pants and....”

“Zac!” Toby interrupted. His face, red from the cold, turned that much redder.

“Hey! Don’t interrupt me! I wasn’t done yet! I didn’t say, ‘over’. Over.”

Toby stooped down even lower and pulled his journal from his pocket. If he was going to be out here, at least he could do something besides stare at the snow.

----from the journal of Tobias Quirk----

I have no idea how Jaxsper stays so cool when he’s kissing Taylor. Last night, it felt like my knees were jelly the moment my lips touched Zac’s. What a kiss! I had no idea the connection of mouths could cause such a reaction! I mean, last summer doing ‘stuff’ with Zac was nice but kissing him was so much better. It charged every nerve in my body. I reckon it’s not unlike sticking a fork in the toaster.

It’s too bad that it had to be ruined by someone standing outside of our window. I don't even like to think about it. Could it possibly be that the same person who killed a man at the train station in Oklahoma, followed us on the train killing someone else, and is still following us?”

---end journal entry---

Toby put down his pen and stuffed his journal back into his jacket pocket. Just thinking about the possibility that they were being stalked scared him.

He cast a sideways glance around the chilly courtyard of their motel. An older man walked by quickly. Maybe he was the killer. Then, another man went past, this one with a narrow face and beady eyes. Definitely killer material for sure. There was a middle aged Asian woman coming from her car, wearing a long coat, maybe too long. Sure, it was cold out but still....who’s to say that the killer is a man?

Toby stopped himself. No sense in freaking out this much. They were only trapped in this frozen motel with a supposed stalker/killer right outside of their room and no one to protect or believe them.

“It’s not like the police are much help,” Toby thought.

_________________________

Toby and Zac called the police that morning, before attempting the stake-out. They were laughed at.

Inspector Piper asked if Toby had seen this stalker’s face. Toby told him that he didn’t. That it was covered up. Toby could almost hear the inspector laughing into the receiver.

“There’s alot of things that are covered up around here, young man,” the inspector said. “Kids traveling cross-country alone, some of them not even knowing who they are, poking at bodies. Criminey!”

Toby and Zac shared the phone, holding it between them. Their faces almost touching.

Zac grabbed the phone and said, “Try to listen and pay attention, or am I expecting too much? Toby did see someone outside of our room. I did see a body on the train. Something is going on. Why would we make this up?”

“I don’t believe that you are making this up, son. I had patrol men come by your motel all night long. They didn’t see anyone. Maybe you are letting your imagination run away with you. Whatever crimes were committed seemed to begin and end on the train route. Not everyone who comes in contact with you winds up dead. I’m talking to you now. If your ‘theory’ is right then suppose I’ll wind up dead too?”

“That’s the best suggestion you’ve made all day,” Zac said.

He could almost hear the steam coming out of the inspector’s collar.

“Son, just stay where you are. Don’t go anywhere. If it will make you feel any better, I’ll increase the patrol’s stops by your motel. The investigators who would like to speak with you and your party will be here this afternoon and we’ll have this all wrapped up then.”

Zac was growing increasingly frustrated. Being called, “son” every two minutes was not helping his disposition.

“Toby and I have information, though. If you’d listen to us, we could probably crack this crime wide open for you,” Zac said.

“That’s just one man’s opinion. Me and my men are highly trained investigators. We’ll get to the bottom of this and we don’t need the help of some kids. We’re not that dumb.”

“Well, that’s one man’s opinion too,” Zac said as he hung up the phone.

Zac went to his suitcase, dug out his walkie-talkies and a pair of binoculars.

“Come on, Tobe. If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself.... with your help of course. I’ll show the genius of dectectivity. We’ll see about that...that Einstein who masterminded a plan where he ends up baby-sitting a buncha sitting ducks!”

__________________________________

Sometimes he thought about Taylor Hanson. No, actually, he always thought about Taylor Hanson. Weird. He liked him and he hated him all at the same time. He had some pretty crazy fantasies about Taylor Hanson, actually. All that talent and power wrapped up in all that softness, that’s what did it for him. It gnawed at something in him.

Sometimes he thought, “If only I had been the one to meet Taylor Hanson instead of that Jaxsper-loser. If I just had a few minutes of his time, he would see me for what I am. Instead, I have to use my ‘art’ to get his attention. Two bodies so far, and he’s yet to notice!”

Sometimes he would daydream. He’d dream about chasing Taylor Hanson. Maybe he would be totally freaked out over the ‘art’. But, even if Taylor Hanson was freaked out, he’d grab him from behind - rough, but not enough to do any real damage...maybe just a small bruise or something, sort of a rough-art-sketch to remember him by. Anyway, Taylor Hanson would be running away, freaked out, his long-blond hair flapping behind him, he’d grab him roughly. He’s spin Taylor Hanson around, the long-blond hair would get all tangled in his fingers, and force him to look at his work. His art. All those bodies that he’d made so beautiful just for Taylor Hanson. Then, Taylor Hanson would see how talented and powerful he was! Taylor Hanson would love him too. Then, the two artists would be together forever.

_______________________

Zac snuck the binoculars out over the top of his newspaper again and scoped the courtyard from one end to the other. He caught Toby in his sights, and Zac smiled. Toby smiled back and discretely waved to his friend from behind the tree. “It’s nice,” Zac thought, “seeing Toby so happy.”

He watched Toby through the binoculars a while longer. Their eyes met - well Zac’s eyes met Toby’s while Toby’s eyes met the binoculars trained at him. For a moment, they forgot all about looking for a killer.

“I’ll ask again, Zac, how long do we have to sit here?” Toby said into the walkie-talkie

“As long as it takes. Taylor and the other guys won't be back from taking X in for his meeting with the doctors until later this afternoon. The cops won't be ready to talk to us for awhile still. If we sat around waiting for those guys to solve it, we'd die of old age or worse. It's up to us. Hey, if you can’t do the ‘stakeout-behind-the-newspaper’ thing then you have no business calling yourself a detective! And stop forgetting to say ‘over’. Over.”

Toby yawned, still tired from last night. Zac, seeing this, yawned too. Toby seeing Zac,

yawned again. Zac yawned once more, putting down the paper and stretching his arms behind his back.

“Will you stop that! Over,” Zac squaked into the walkie-talkie.

“What?” Toby said, pushing the button and replying.

“The yawning! We’re on official business here, over.”

“I can’t help it,” Toby said, “I’m tired from last night. What with looking for a killer, it’s not like I got much sleep.”

“Yeah,” Zac answered, “To say nothing of out nighttime activities. That must have kept you up too. I admit it, I am amazing.”

“That too, plus the fact that you kept hogging all the covers, and putting your feet on my back. Maybe we should go back to our room for a nap?”

“Nap, huh?” Zac said, “I bet you want to go back to our room for a ‘nap’. Is that what you kids are calling it these days. Uh-uh. We’re on official business here, and business before pleasures.”

Zac could see he was losing Toby’s attention with this stakeout and decided that if he was going t find this stalker, he needed to kick it up a notch. He eyed the hotel maid, pushing a cleaning cart, through the binoculars. She knocked on the door to one of the rooms, opened it with a pass key and entered carrying a vacuum.

“Come on, Tobe,” Zac said, “I’ve got an idea.”

“Are we going back to our room?” Toby asked.

“Not just our room, all of them.”

CHAPTER 13

Zac pulled the black sweater over his head and tied a handkerchief over the lower half of his face. He opened bathroom door and rejoined his friend.

“This is a stick-up,” he said, thrusting his hand into his pocket, pointing his finger like the barrel of a gun. “Gimme your wallet and all your clothes. And please, give them to me slowly.”

“You’re going to need a bigger gun,” Toby answered as he pulled his dark purple Volcom shirt with the silver logo, over his head. “What’s with the mask anyway?”

“It’s all part of my plan.”

“What’s the plan?” Toby asked, pulling the handkerchief mask down from Zac’s face and kissing him briefly on the mouth.

Zac turned and brushed his hand over his lips, wiping the kiss away.

“Hey! I thought I told you. No mushy love stuff!,” Zac said. “For that matter, I thought I told you to dress in black for the next part of my plan. We’re trying to be inconspicuous.”

Zac pointed to the bright silver logo across Toby’s shirt. It stood out like a neon sign.

“I’m sorry, when I packed I thought I was going to a wedding not a funeral. This is the darkest clothing I have. You know, if you wanted to pick my clothes for me, you could have stayed out here and helped me get dressed. You didn’t need to go into the bathroom to change. I reckon I’ve...well.. sort of seen you in various stages of undress by now, you know.”

The color came to Zac’s cheeks. Toby thought that the red matched beautifully with the dark black of his shirt and the pink of Zac’s lips.

Zac was still having a bit of trouble making the transition from “friend” to “lover”, and needed his space. He wasn’t sure if it was because Toby was a boy, or just because being part of a couple was more difficult than being in a trio with his brothers. His brain started smoking as he tried to come up with an explanation for his sudden modesty, a clever response, a joke, a dirty limerick, something. Finding nothing, he took Toby’s arm and directed him towards the door, telling him it was time to get on with phase two of his plan to catch the stalker/murderer - if there truly was one.

Toby broke the silence. “So, what’s the plan? It’s not just ‘sit in the snow and look at people’ again is it? I’m not just going to run off on another one of your half-cocked plans.”

“First of all ‘half-cocked’...,” Zac said, raising an eyebrow. “Secondly, ‘plan’? What’s with you and the plans? You know, you sound like one of those guys who has to have his whole life planned out before he can live it.”

“So.. then you’re saying there is no plan, right?” Toby answered.

“Of course there’s a plan. Who orchestrated the Taylor/Jaxsper reunion? Me. Who organized an entire wedding for his brother? Me.”

“Who screamed like a girl when X snuck up on him in a darkened train? I think that was you too, right?” Toby said, smiling.

“Let’s just say I have a plan, and it’s a full-cocked one. Thank you very much. We’re going to search all the rooms of this hotel. And, we’re going to use these.” Zac lifted a ring of keys and swung them around his index finger.

“Where did you get those?!” Toby asked, looking around to make sure no one spotted them.

“Lifted them off the maid’s cart just before we went back to our room. To catch a criminal you gotta think and act like one. If you really did see a guy last night, he couldn’t get far in the snow. That means he’s staying here.”

The boys walked along the courtyard of the motel. Toby shivered a little from the snow and the thought of a killer staying in the same place they were.

__________________________

Their first big discovery on the search? Everyone staying at the motel was a major pig! Maybe the hotel maid was slowed because she couldn’t find her keys, but Zac decided that he and his brothers weren’t the only ones who lived the ‘rock star life’ when they left their hotel rooms thrashed. They were just typical hotel guest.

“Nothing! Not a bloody knife, not a nose, not a finger. Nothing!” Zac said as they snuck out of one room and crept to the other. “I would have thought for sure we would have found it by now.”

The boys tried to keep to the shadows, which was difficult in the now-afternoon sun. The rays of light bounced off the small amount of snow that remained on the ground. Jaxsper and the others would be back soon. Zac hoped they’d have solved this crime before dinner.

Zac used his keys to open another room, poked his head in to make sure no one was there and jumped inside.

“Maybe it would help if I knew what we were looking for,” Toby said.

“A clue. We’re looking for a clue.”

“Gesundheit,” Toby said, stifling a laugh.

“Yeah, real funny, Tobe,” Zac said, pawing through a black leather suitcase.

After 29 rooms, the boys had fallen into a pattern. Toby would go through the closet and check the wastepaper baskets for clues, and Zac would look in the suitcases to see if

anything looked suspicious.

“Look!” Toby said.

Zac got excited, until he realized that Toby was only holding up two pieces of purple paper he plucked from the trash can.

“Flyers for a winter carnival. In town. Tonight,” Toby said. “Let’s go. It’ll be fun.”

Toby mind hearkened back to Jaxsper’s story of his first date with Taylor. How they had gone to a carnival together, and how he knew how much he and Taylor were in love at that moment. Toby hoped for the same reaction from Zac.

“Fun! Don’t you dare ruin this moment of murder talk with your talk of fun. Business before pleasure!” Zac tossed the now crumpled clothes back into the suitcase and zipped it up tight.

Toby stuffed the flyers into his pocket and they moved onto the next room. Along the way, he stopped to pick up a small rock he saw lying on the ground.

“At least this won’t be a total loss,” he thought. “Another memory stone to add to my growing collection.”

“Only a couple of rooms left,” Toby sighed as they crept into room 239.

They boys went about their assigned tasks again when suddenly Zac started making Three Stooges like gasps.

“T-t-t-oby,” he squeaked, “I think I struck gold!”

Toby rushed over to Zac’s side. Zac slowly pulled out an schedule for the train they traveled by until a recently, a set of what looked like pass keys for the train, and about half a dozen teen magazines with Hanson on the cover.

“Don’t even tell me this is X’s room! Please!” Zac said

“It’s not,” Toby assured him, his voice cracking slightly. “His rooms on the other side of the courtyard by ours.

The boys thumbed through the magazines slowly. They were filled it pictures of Hanson, every one of them circled repeatedly with a black marker.

“I think we’ve found our guy,” Zac said, pulling the thick-black marker out of the suitcase as well.

The words were barely out of his mouth when both boys heard a key being slid into the lock on the hotel room door.

CHAPTER 14

This chapter to be filled in later.

Medical History

Name: Unknown
Date of Birth: Unknown
MR# 20073
Attending Physician: Dr. Martin Regulous

CHIEF COMPLAINT: Temporarily being held in my custody for observation.

PATIENT HISTORY: Patient, answering to (for lack of a better name) "X" claims to have some form of amnesia. Little of Patient's history is known.

PHYSICAL FINDINGS: According to what little history that can be gleaned from the Patient, he has been in generally good health for "as long as he can remember." Length of time undetermined. Patient is a thin and slightly malnourished, Caucasian male approximately 16 to 17 years of age, in no distress. The head is normocephalic with minute evidence of proptosis. Ears, nose and throat are negative. The neck is supple, the thyroid is negative to palpitation. The heart is normal in size and rhythm with no murmurs. The abdomen is soft, no masses, no organomegaly, no tenderness. Normal uncircumcised genitalia. Progression through puberty appears on schedule. The lymph nodes are negative. The limbs are intact and freely mobile. The deep tendon reflexes are +2 bilaterally, the pupils are equally reactive to light and accommodation.

PROVISIONAL DIAGNOSIS:
1. Probable Delusion Disorder manifesting psychosomatic memory loss, probably consciously manifested/possibly sub-consciously manifested.
2. Rule out Bipolar Disorder.
3. Rule out Intermittent Explosive Disorder - does not appear to be a physical threat to himself or others.
4. Antisocial Personality Disorder - including possible homosexual leanings. Leanings may be attributed to confusion (either conscious or subconsciously caused and mentioned in diagnosis 1 above.)





CHAPTER 15

The door to room 239 opened and a figure entered the seemingly empty motel room.

Zac peered out through the slats in the door of the closet.

This was not part of the plan!” he said, as he crouched in the closet.

“Who is it? Is it the murderer?” Toby asked, cramped behind Zac.

Zac’s eyes narrowed and he shifted his head back and forth trying to catch a glimpse through the tiny space between the slats.

“I.... I think it is. I see him. He’s moving very slowly. It looks like he brought something with him too. It’s.... it’s a rifle! He’s assembling one of those high-powered rifles,” Zac’s whisper becoming more and more shrill with each word.

“Stay quiet. We don’t want him to know we’re here,” Zac whispered. “Quiet..... quiet...”

The tiny, cramped closet grew very still, except for the sound of two boy’s breathing hard. Toby instinctively reached out and grabbed Zac’s hand.

Zzzzzzzzzzzhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

The sound came so suddenly both boys jumped.

“It’s not a high-powered rifle. That’s a vacuum, you dope!” Toby whispered back. “It’s the hotel maid.”

Toby stifled a snicker, and Zac elbowed him.

“Keep quiet! We still can’t let her find us in here,” Zac said.

“So, Sherlock, what’s the plan now?” Toby asked.

“When I come up with one, I’ll let you know,” answered Zac.

_______________________________

“Seems like you’ve got it all figured out,” I said to Taylor as we rode back home from the psychiatric facility.

“It just seemed to make sense. There was no way Quick was going to leave X there alone over night, and there was absolutely no chance that I’d leave Zac without supervision. Quick should stay. The hotel we found for him is much closer than the motel the police stuck us in. That way he can see X again first thing in the morning, and by afternoon the both of them can rejoin the rest of us.”

“And hopefully, we can be released and start back home tomorrow afternoon.” I said, a little louder to the police driving us back to the motel could hear. “How much longer can you keep us? It’s not like we really know anything.”

“Detective Piper told you it’s for your own protection. Two people around you have been killed, one of them found by your brother. The FBI has been delayed, but they want to talk to you. Murder’s a serious business. Besides.... Piper doesn’t want to be responsible for letting anything happen to big stars like Hanson.”

“Not that he even knows who we are,” added Taylor, somewhat perturbed.

Tay wasn’t taking to this ‘protective custody’ thing any better than I was. For me, it was a constant reminder of the dreams I’ve had. A reminder that something horrible might happen. The sooner we get away from all this, the better for me.

“Well,” the cop said, “Piper might not know, but my daughter sure does. She’d kill me if anything happened to you. Thanks again for the autograph. She’s got all your CDs. You know, if you’re not doing anything tonight, she’d... well be thrilled if you came over. Unless, you’ve got a girlfriend or something, that is.”

Taylor looked at the ring on his finger then over to me. I blushed and wondered what Taylor might say. It’s not like he was going to announce to the world our marriage, was he?

“No, thank you for the offer,” he said, comfortable as always with the ‘girlfriend’ question, “But I have other plans. I’m still hoping that we’ll be released tomorrow and I want to be ready to go. I think my friends and I might go to bed early to rest up for the trip home.”

Taylor squeezed my hand and turned to me, saying quietly, “You have called your Mom and told her we might be a few more days right?”

I told him I had. She would be picking us up at the train station. She was still a little mad about me running away, and the delay in my return trip home wasn’t making her any more calm.

“Good,” Taylor said, lowering his voice even more, “I want to meet my mother-in-law.”

The silence in the car was almost palpable. I knew what Taylor’s next question would be, and he knew what his next question would be. I didn’t want him to ask. I was hoping he wouldn’t ask, but he asked just the same.

“You... you did tell her about us, finally. Right?”

“Not exactly,” I said, squirming in my seat. Suddenly the police car seemed smaller than it did 10 minutes ago.

I braced myself for Taylor’s next comment.

“Here it comes,” I thought.

Nothing.

No answer.

“It’s just, not something I wanted to get into over the phone. You understand, right?” I said.

“Mmm Hmmm,” Taylor murmured, nodding.

I felt like he was scrutinizing every word I said. I continued, “I know you’re upset with me about that. I really wanted to tell her, I promise. It’s just.... It’s just really frustrating.”

Taylor exhaled loudly but kept his blue eyes fixed straight ahead. My eyes, on the other hand jetted from the cop in the front seat, to Taylor, to the wedding ring on my finger and

back again.

“I’m really sorry,” I whispered, “I want to tell everyone in the whole world. I promise. but...”

Taylor suddenly turned and looked at me, more serious than ever.

“I’m not that bad of a catch, you know,” he said.

Be strong, I told myself. Be brave. I reached over and gently brushed a lock of hair out of his face. Not caring if anyone saw. My only thoughts at that moment were of Taylor. “I know you are a catch,” I said smiling. “I’m really sorry to ever give the impression that you are not.”

Taylor’s shoulders relaxed, and his eyes ceased their laser-lake stare.

“No,” he said. “I’m sorry for rushing you into something you’re not ready for.”

I could tell that we had softened but he still wasn’t fully satisfied. I didn’t know what to say. A whole slew of emotions paraded through me. Relief. Guilt. Sympathy. Love. Frustration.

“I’ll tell her soon,” I said. “I promise.”

If I could, I would have reached over and kissed him, but we were not alone. We rode back the rest of the way in silence. Taylor not quite mad, but surely disappointed.

_______________________________

“What’s she doing now?” asked Toby, craning his head around trying to see through the slats in the closet door himself. Zac’s body blocked his way.

“I don’t know.”

“Is she done? Is she leaving?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t think maids clean the closet do you?”

“I don’t know,” Zac said. “It’s not like I planned to get stuck like this. How stupid do you think I am?”

“I don’t know,” Toby answered

“Don’t start that!” Zac said, slightly laughing. I’m sure we’ll be out of this soon.”

“I don’t know,” Toby said again.

Toby sat, squatting on the balls of his feet, his back against the wall of the closet. Zac knelt in front of him. The small space meant that Zac had to lean his body against Toby’s chest. While Toby liked the feeling of being close to Zac, he wasn’t too crazy about the enclosed space.

Now that the initial fear of a killer right in the same room was past, Toby had time to asses his environment. He looked around the tiny, cramped closet. It felt as if the walls were closing in on him. The dim light. The heat from two boys crammed tightly together. Toby’s legs growing numb. The only sounds being their breathing, and Toby’s heartbeat - which grew louder every second. Freedom only inches away. He wanted out. All he had to do was open the door.

“I want out,” Toby whispered, somewhat desperately.

“In a minute or so,” Zac answered. “Take a chill pill.”

“No, you don’t understand. I can’t take it. I’ve gotta get out.”

Toby tried to stand, but Zac’s weight and the position he was in made it difficult. He grew more desperate. He started to struggle.

Zac suddenly realized it was more than just Toby getting antsy. He reached over and put his hand on Toby’s shoulder.

“Toby, it’s ok. I’m right here. You’re fine,” he said, trying to sound as reassuring and yet stay quiet as possible. “Close your eyes. Don’t think about where you are. Think about who you’re with.

Toby did that. He tried to slow his breathing. Tried to calm his sweating body. He stopped struggling to stand and relaxed.

“It’s gonna be ok, Tobe,” Zac said. I’m right here,” Zac punctuated that by rubbing his body against Toby’s more, somewhat reassuringly and somewhat sexually. “Gosh, Tobe, you happy to be here or what?” Zac rubbed against him again.

Toby, calmer now, laughed slightly, “That’s a rock I picked up earlier for my memory jar!”

Toby snaked his hand to his side pulled the contents of his pocket out. The stone and the two purple flyers advertising a local carnival.

“A plan! I got it,” Zac announced.

“No you don’t.”

“I might.”

“Ok, you might..... but you don’t,” Toby answered, much calmer now.

“Maybe I’ll just do this on my own then.”

“Alight, I’ll be good. What’s the plan?”

Toby took the things from Toby’s hand and wrote something on the back of one of the flyers, using the marker he clutched in his hand. It was the same marker he found in the suitcase during his search.

“Now, let’s get you out of here,” Zac said.

He burst out the closet door, ignoring the startled look of the maid.

“See! I told you he’d never find us. Am I great at ‘hide-and-seek’ or what?”

“Uh... yeah. ‘Hide-and-seek” Toby added.

“Oh well, might as well leave him this note saying he’s still it.” Zac said as he dropped the purple paper onto the room’s desk.

As they walked out of the room, Zac used the marker again. He handed the rock back to Toby as they returned to their own room.

“Here you go, Tobe. Another rock to add to your collection.”

Toby looked down and read, Coming out of the closet with Zac.

_________________________

No sooner did the police car drop us off and drive off than Zac and Toby ran over to join us. They asked us how X was doing and where Quick was. We caught them up to speed as quickly as possible. They were glad to hear that X was going to be ok, and strangely enough Zac seemed also glad to hear that we’d be stuck in this town for another night.

“That sort of helps with what I’ve got planned,” he said.

I thought I saw Toby’s mouth turn up at a mention of the word ‘plan’.

“I thought you and Jaxsper would like to join me and Toby on our date,” Zac added, grinning ear to ear.

“Y-y-our date?” Taylor answered, somewhat shocked.

I think Toby looked as serprized by the bombshell as Taylor did.

“Yeah, I guess a date. What’s the big deal. Toby and I have started going out. Don’t tell me you’ve got a problem with that!"

“You two... Really..... Are you?” Taylor said, sounding happier than ever.

“Yeah,” Zac said, matter of factly. “Toby’s pretty cool. You and Jax seem happy together, so I thought, ‘why should Tay have all the fun’? Believe me, it’s not like we rushed into this. It’s been going on for awhile. Jax knows all about it.”

Taylor looked over at me. “Jax? Jax knew?”

“I.... ummmm... sort of saw them together when we were filming The Real World thing. Besides, he swore me to secrecy...with real swear words.” I answered, trying to joke my way out of it.

“Well, seems like Jax really has a problem telling people things,” Taylor answered, somewhat perturbed.

“Thanks, brother-in-law” I thought. Zac didn’t mean to get me in more hot water, I’m sure. He seemed to be able to tell people about his relationship with Toby much easier that I could. I was sort of envious of him.

Luckily Zac’s exuberance broke the quick chill between Taylor and I.

He said, “So, you two going to join us tonight? I figured that I’m going, Toby’s going, Taylor’s gotta go so he can keep an eye on us, and we know Tay can’t go 30 seconds without his ‘better half-wit’ so why not make this a whole double date thingie.”

Taylor and I agreed. I think it might be a good thing. It might take Tay’s mind off of my mistake of not telling my Mom about us yet. And, I think it might take my mind off the dreams I’ve been having. Toby and Zac wouldn’t tell us where we were going, only that it was a ‘perfect place for all of us to go’ and that ‘there’s lots of memories there for us.’ We’d have to be back early, so that we could check in with the police, but a few hours wouldn’t kill us.... I hoped.

________________________

Toby and Zac returned to their room to get ready for the double date.

“I love it when a plan comes together,” Zac said.

“Are you ever going to let me in on all this. I can’t believe you would just blurt out to Taylor that we were dating.”

Zac smiled, still lost in his scheme. “We got him on the run now. I think we’ve flushed him out. Now he knows that we know and he thinks he knows all we know but we know more. You gotta goose these people that’s all. So now he’s gonna let up. Make a mistake. All we gotta do is rattle his cage a little.”

“Does this have something to do with that flyer?” Toby asked.

“Yeah,” Zac said as he shut the door to their room. “All I did was write, ‘I know what you did! See you at the fair tonight.’ He’ll think we’re trying to blackmail him or something, and we’ll get him! While he’s busy looking for the guy who wrote the note he won't even see us, and when he shows up we’ll be watching him and catch him.”

“That’s so stupid! How will we know it’s him? Who's he think he's going to meet at the fair? How will he know who left the note?”

“That’s easy,” Zac answered, “I signed Taylor’s name.”


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