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Helloooooooo!!!!!! Welcome to to the Sounds of Kramer page.

She can bring home the bacon and fry it in the pan!

You're crazy!

Kramer explains why he threw a banana at a monkey

Oh yeah I like this idea

Kramer explains how he tries to drive a bus while getting mugged

I felt like a naked innocent boy roamin' the countryside

It was like I was swimming through a flabby armed spanking machine!

Step back son, there's nothing to see here.

It was like I was swimming through a flabby armed spanking machine!

Kramer advises agains circumsicion

I'm Cosmo Kramer. The Assman.

Oh, I'm lookin' right at you big daddy

Giddy up!

No chance in hell.

I'm hit!

Good mornniiinnnngggg!!!!

Hey! I just saw a pigman! A pigman!

I talk the talk and walk the walk, baby.

tcb takin' care of business

Just tell it!

So what's up diggity dog?

Dr. Cosmo Kramer, Proctology.

Cause I'm like ice, buddy. When I don't like you, you've got problems.

My boys need a house.

They're smooth, creamy, delicate, yet masculine.

Will you stop it man. You're freaking me out!

I'm dangerous Jerry. I'm very, very dangerous.

It was destroying my brain cells!

Kramer tells George to listen to his little man.

You're thin, late thirties, single...

Kramer sings the Beef-o-Rino song to Rusty, the horse.

burned out.

Now you just sayin' you want to have fun or do you really want to have fun?

I'm out...Yep, I'm out of the contest.

We're talking to Elaine Benes, adult film star...

Yeah! yeah! I am batman

Have you ever seen a better looking guy?

Oh you may stray, but you'll always return to your dark master, the coco bean

Well I guess I got confused

It's a festivus miracle!

If I go back in there without any food, there's gonna be trouble!

They're gonna cut him open, his guts will be all over the place.

Look away...I'm... I'm hideous!

Uh oh, you're a john.

Kramer explains karate to Jerry.

It's LA...nobody leaves.

Low flow? I don't like the sound of that!

Mother nature's a MAD scientist, Jerry!

My legs, they were like noodles

Kramer sings opera.

You can't trust slippery Pete.

I'm on the mexican...woaa!!radio

It's refreshing!

Am I? Or am I so sane that I just blew your mind?

Jerry you stand on the threshold to the magical world of sensual delights...

You're one sick mama. I like it!

A vote for me is a vote for Kramer

There's a naked woman across the street!