Yodas corner
So there iz this little muppet named yoda and he turns out to be this really neat guy that can use the force and stuff....In the new movie we see him yunger with rounder eyes and a little bit of an attitude....lets face it......he was a jackass...so anyway somehow he survives not gettin killed where every other jedi except obi wan was killed...and gets to the remote planet of degobah.....explain that one lucas!...anyway.....when he meets luke by the way he iz close to 900 years old....and we then wonder....does he ever die?...but he went through a change on degobah, he was a menace where did he go wrong? in the first one he was stable when did he get a playful side? did he go insane? WHAT?...then he gets ticked when luke iz pissed off at him for bein stupid...Luke had a damn good reason....he was brought back to this guys house who probably hasnt seen action in his life(although there was a girl that looked like yoda in the new movie...i bet he banged her)...if i were luke id be wonderin iz this guy tryin to seduce me?....then obi wan comes back in the pic and starts to talk...thats a little to creepy......so yoda trains luke till he "feels" his friends suffering....but big dog yoda tells him not to go...WHO THE HECK IZ THIS MUPPET TO TELL LUKE HE CAN'T SAVE HIS FRIENDS? i mean just because his friends all died and they speak to him in his mind....when we see him in the third one we see him dying....and if we look back...does anyone really give a care?
Top 12 Things Uttered by Yoda While Making Love
12. "Mmmm... Now I know why they call you 'Deep Space Nine.'"
11. "Shriveled no more!"
10. "How big they are matters little -- handles my ears are not."
9. "That's a hell of a light saber you've got there, Jedi Tommy Lee!"
8. "Mudhole?! Slimy?!! My girlfriend is this!"
7. "Play with the one, but jiggle the two, you will."
6. "Over you must bend, and your dark side show me."
5. "Well, actually, that *is* a snake."
4. "About to spew like Mount St. Helens, am I!"
3. "Fake not. Cum or cum not -- there is no fake."
2. "Into you like a freight train I am, yessss. Oh, my little slutpuppy you are, mmmm?"
1. "The Force is growing gre-- OH SWEET JESUS!!!!!!!!!!"
When i find out how to put sound files on here you can here the crazy talk of this guy...in the mean time check out where he should have been....LUCAS STOLE HIM!!!
