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The Kamikaze Queen

Here is the story of The Kamikaze Queen that I translated from a 14th Century Chinese Chess Archive. I have spelled out the names of the personages phonetically rather than using the Chinese Characters.

The Kamikaze Queen strategy originated in a game between the Japanese Emperor Nowigotcha II and the Chinese Emperor Imathebest in 1466. Both Emperors were distinguished Chess Masters so a game was agreed upon to decide the Champion of the Far East.

The Japanese Emperor deployed a military strategy that had been been developed by the Japanese Queen Shegonnadoitnomatterwhat in a previous military campaign. The defeated opponents labeled the Japanese Queen as The Kamikaze Queen because of her elusive ability to create confusion and havoc on the battlefield.

By adapting the Kamikaze Queen's military strategy the Japanese Emperor was able to defeat the Chinese Emperor in 23 moves. Here are the moves in the game:

1.e4 d5 2.exd5 Qxd5 [The Queen sits enthroned in the middle] 3.Nc3 Qd8 4.g3 e5 5.h4Nf6 6.Bh3 Bxh3 7.Nxh3 Nc6 8.as Be7 9.d3 O-O 10.Bg5 Qd7 11.Qf3 Nd4 12.Qg2 Nxc2+13.Kd1 Qxd3+ 14.Bd2 Rad8 15.f4 Ne3+ 16.Ke1 Nxg2+ 17.Kf2 Qxd2+ 18.Ne2 Bc5+ 19.Kxg2Qxe2+ 20.Nf2 Qxf2+ 21.Kh3 Rd2 22.h5 Qf3 23.a4 Qg4++

The Chinese Emperor was so outraged at being beaten by the Japanese Emperor that he declared war on Japan. The war lasted 25 years and was named the Twokrazequise War. Peace negotiations were initiated by King Igottaputanendtothis of Austrailia in 1491 because the war had ravaged his shipping economy.

The war had depleted the vast reserve of Kola Nuts held by both Emperors to the point that their troops were threatening rebellion. So, after 12 years of intense mediation the war was considered a draw. Both Emperors agreed to help rebuild the Austrailian fleet so that the Austrailian King could continue to ship his famous Kola Nuts. The Kola Nuts were crushed and used as an exotic supplement to fermented drink and this produces great strength, endurance, and sexual prowess.

Despite the resupply of Kola Nuts, the Chinese Emperor considered the draw as a defeat for he had the superior military resources. Unknown to the Japanese Emperor, the Chinese Emperor put his son-in-law Iamgonnabethwontogethim in charge of planning a new strategy for winning the Chess Championship of the Far East.

Almost 50 years passed from the time of the first game until the Chinese Emperor's dream was fulfilled. His Grandson, Heisgonnageteven II, challenged and beat the Japanese Emperor for the Championship of the Far East. The Chinese Grandson employed a strategy called "The Heimlich Defense" that was developed by King Wolfson of Sweden in his battle for the North Atlantic Chess Championship in 1508.

The two chess games between the nations of China and Japan set the stage for continued Chinese and Japanese hostility even to this day. If you want to read the original Chinese manuscript you can access the material at: http://www.chess/1516/ifyoulook/thisup/youare/gullible.html

Copyright 1996

If you have enjoyed this story, send me an e-mail for future Chess stories are always needed to be researched and posted. BE SURE to check out the stories of The Heimlich Defence and The Frostbite Opening-- listed on the main page.

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