Engineer's Drinking Song - Version 1
CHORUS:
We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers,
We can, we can, we can, we can demolish fourty beers,
Drink rum, drink rum, drink rum, drink rum,
Drink rum, and come along with us,
For we don't give a damn for any damn man,
Who don't give a damn for us!
Godiva was a lady who through Coventry did ride,
To show all the villagers her pretty bare white hide.
The most observant man on earth, an Engineer of course,
Was the only one to notice that Godiva rode a horse.
She said "I've come a long, long way, the man will go as far,
Who takes me off this goddamn horse and leads me to a bar."
The men who took her off her horse and stood her too a beer,
Were a blurry-eyed surveyor, and a drunken Engineer.
Godiva was a lady well-endowed there was no doubt.
She never wore a stitch of clothes, just wound her hair about.
The first man who ever made her was an Engineer of course,
But an Artsie queer, on just one beer once made Godiva's horse.
My father was a miner from the northern Malamute,
My mother was a mistress in a house of ill repute.
They kicked me out at a tender age and never shed a tear,
"Get out of here you son of a bitch, and join the Engineers!"
An Artsman and an Engineer once found a gallon can,
Said the Artsman, "Match me drink for drink, let's see if you’re a man"
They drank three drinks, the artsman died, his face was turning green.
But the Engineer drank on and said "It's only gasoline"
I happened once upon a girl whose eyes were full of fire,
Her physical endowments would have made your hands perspire.
To my surprise she told me that she had never been kissed,
Her boyfriend was a tired Engineering Scientist.
Sir Francis Drake and all his men set out for Calais Bay,
They'd heard the Spanish Run fleet was headed up that way,
But the Engineers had beat them by a night and half a day,
And though ass tight as virgins, you still could hear them say ...
Caesar went of Egypt at the age of fifty three,
But Cleopatra's blood was red, her heart was warm and free,
And every night when Caesar said goodnight at one o'clock,
A Roman Engineer was waiting just around the block.
Venus is a statue made entirely of stone,
There's not a fig leaf on her, she's as naked as a bone.
On noticing her arms were gone, an Engineer discoursed,
"the damn thing's busted concrete and should be reinforced."
A maiden and an Engineer were sitting in a park,
The Engineer was busy doing research after dark.
His scientific method was a marvel to observe,
While his right hand wrote the figures down, his left hand traced the curves.
My mother peddles opium, my father's on the dole.
My sister used to walk the streets, but now she's on parole,
My brother runs a restaurant with bedrooms in the rear,
But they don't even speak to me, 'cause I'm an Engineer.
Now you've hear our story and you know were Engineers,
And like all good jolly fellows we drink our whiskey clear,
We drink to every fellow who comes here from far and near,
'Cause we're a HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-A HELL-OF-AN ENGINEER!
Engineer's Drinking Song - Version 2
Lady Godiva's Hymn
(aka The Engineer's Song, Engineering Drinking Song)
Sung to the tune of The Battle Hymn of the Republic
Chorus
We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers,
We can, we can, we can, we can demolish 40 beers.
Drink rum, drink rum, drink rum, drink rum, and come along with us,
For we don't give a damn for any old man who don't give a damn about us.
Godiva was a lady who through Coventry did ride.
To show to all the villagers her lovely lily white hide.
The most observant villager, an Engineer of course,
Was the only one that noticed that Godiva road a horse.
Chorus
I've come a long, long way she said, and I will go as far,
With the man who takes me off this horse, and leads me to a bar.
The men who took her of her stead, and stood her to a beer,
Were a bleary-eyed Surveyor and a drunken Engineer.
Chorus
My father was miner from the Northern Malamute,
My mother was mistress in a house of ill-repute,
They kicked me out at a tender age for drinking all their beer,
Saying “Get to UNB, you Son Of a Bitch, and become an engineer!”
Chorus
An Artsman and an Engineer once found a gallon can.
Said the Artsman, "Match me drink for drink and prove that you're a man."
They drank three drinks, the Artsman died, his face was turning green.
But the Engineer drank on and said, "It's only gasoline"!
Chorus
A maiden and an Engineer were sitting in a park,
The Engineer was busy doing research after dark,
His scientific method was a marvel to observe,
While his right hand wrote the figures, his left hand traced the curves.
Chorus
UNB was UNB when Dal was just a pup
and UNB will be UNB when DalTech's time is up
If any DalTech bastard even thinks he's in our class
he can bend right over and kiss sir Edmund's ass!
Chorus
Now Venus is statue made entirely of stone,
There's not a fig leaf on her, she's as naked as a bone;
On noticing her arms were broke, an Engineer discoursed,
Of the course the damn thing's broke, it should be reinforced.
Chorus
Sir Francis Drake and all his ships set out for Calais Bay,
They hear the Spanish Rum Fleet was heading up that way,
But the Engineers had beat them by a night and half a day,
Though they were gassed completely, you still could hear them say.....
Chorus
I happened once upon a maid whose eyes were full of fire,
her physical endowments would have made your hands perspire,
She shocked us when she told that she never had been kissed,
For her boyfriend was a tired Engineering Physicist.
Chorus
After reading Karma Sutra, they tried position number 9,
For proving masculinity, it truly was divine.
But then one day the girl rebelled and threw him on his rear,
For he was a feeble Artsie and she an Engineer.
Chorus
Now Caesar went to Egypt at the age of fifty-three,
But Cleopatra's blood was warm, her heart was young and free,
And every night when Julius said goodnight at three o'clock,
There was a Roman Engineer just waiting 'round the block.
Chorus
An Engineering one came to school so drunk and very late,
Carry a load that you'd expect to ship by freight,
The only things that held him up and kept him on his course,
Were a boundary condition and the electromotive force.
Chorus
My mother peddles opium, my father's on the dole,
My sister used to walk the streets, but now she's on parole,
My brother runs a restaurant with bedrooms in the rear,
But none of them will talk to me 'cause I'm an Engineer.
Chorus
Rapunzel let her hair down for two suitors down below,
So one of them could grab a hold and give the old heave-ho.
The prince began to climb at once, but soon he came out worst,
For the Engineer rode up a lift, and reached Rapunzel first.
Chorus
By now you've heard our story and you know we're Engineers,
Unlike the stupid Artsies, we will end up careers.
An engineer from UNB earns roughly 60 G's,
And artsie with a Ph.D. will work at Mickey D's.
We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers,
We can, we can, we can, we can demolish 40 beers.
Drink rum, drink rum, drink rum, drink rum until the day is done
'Cause we're a HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-A HELL-OF-AN ENGINEER!
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