ANOTHER MEDICAL BILL!
I will NEVER go back to the gynecologist again. I had to go in January or they wouldn't give me a new prescription for my hormones that I HAVE to take since my hysterectomy. Well today I get a bill for that visit in January. I have to pay the bill! Turns out Medicare won't pay it because I went in four months too soon. Medicare says they only cover your visit every two years. Had I waited till April, they would have paid it. I told them my obgyn was holding my prescription hostage till I had the exam. They wouldn't give it to me till I went in. She said I had to call him and have him call the billing company and tell them they insisted I had to go in on January in order to get my medication refilled. Then they have to refile. Still, I may have to pay the bill.

So I called the doctor's office. He is on vacation. I get the nurse's voice mail and relay all of this. She calls back and says, "We can only say we ENCOURAGE our patients to come in for this exam every year....." I told her "NO. YOU held my prescription and MADE me come in. YOU tell them that you wouldn't give it to me until I did and MADE me come in. YOU tell them exactly that. She just repeated the same thing and I stopped her and said it louder. She just said the same thing.

So I wrote my doctor a letter and told him what happened and included a copy of the bill. I HOPE that works. Probably won't and now I'm stuck paying for my examination bill of $150.00!! When it comes time to renew my prescription, I will tell them either you call in a new one or I will just stop taking the meds. I'm NOT coming in unless YOU pay the bill!

I've had a horrible day! I was woken up by the neighbor. This is my NEW neighbor. She was coming in at 2:30 a.m. with a man up the stairs. I wandered into the bathroom and heard him say, "Boy you're drunk!!" All I could think was "Wonderful........another one."

So I feel trapped......broke........and have nowhere to go and wonder how on earth I can find $150.00 just to pay for this stupid bill. Medicare pretty much told me they would deny it again if they resubmitted it.

UPDATE ON BAD NEIGHBOR AND SUFFERING
My horrible next door neighbor moved to TX Friday. She went out with a bang. Loud, obnoxious friends came over for a party, she didn't pack till night time, and allowed her child to scream and run up and down the stairs the entire week. She also did the same thing. Needless to say, it made me physically sick.

I need to live outside of town in a small house, but I can't afford to move. I can't afford a home. All of my disability income goes to basic needs, 23 prescription meds, and doctor bills. The only way I will ever be able to break out of this stressful situation is if a financial miracle comes to my rescue, at least enough to find a home outside of town and to pay for a move.

The stress is causing more and more flares and literally killing me. I just wait on pins and needles to see who will move in next and how bad they will be.

And the horrible preacher who torments me about my cats STILL lives in the house next door to me. Since he stood on my doorstep the week before Christmas and threatened to bring charges against me, called me a liar, and tormented me, I have only gone outside of the house to go to and from the doctor's office, grocery store and to feed my cats in the back yard. A privacy fence hides where they eat. I've been too afraid to go outside. He stirred up so much trouble among my other neighbors, including the girl next door, the lady on the corner and behind me that I was so afraid to go outside.

I am the neighbor who is quiet, never bothers another person and is kind to animals and people. I have been the neighbor who was tormented and talked about, whose landlord has harassed for no reason, laughed at, and rejected because an old man is so obsessed with his hatred toward animals. And he does this because I do not have a man in my life to stand up for me. I am a single woman whose family have all passed away, have only one friend who has stood by her in time of illness, and become his favorite target.

I need help. I need a home outside of this town, one not in an apartment, but a home in the country away from the people of this town.

With every stressful day that passes, lupus flares and destroys another area of my mind and body. With it comes more suffering that medicine doesn't seem to help.

UPDATE
Ceiling repaired exactly 10 days after crash. Marty said she would also repair everything else on the list I gave to her.

Guy also tarred the roof over the back porch. Tried to fix the light on porch inside, but said he would have to have an entirely new light. Never came back. It remains on my back porch in pieces.

Record of Next door Neighbor Problems

Still recovering over here. Having a quiet weekend helped so much. My adjoining neighbor, the single woman with a 2 yr. old, was away for the weekend and made it so quiet here. We share a wall and floor. When he runs wild next door, I hear it all and feel every jump. Then Monday happened. Last night her baby-sitter brought three older boys, around 7-10, with her. The noise was unbearable for hours. From 6:00 until they were screaming and running up and down the stairs. I went next door and asked her to please turn the noise down some with the running and screaming. The sitter yelled at me and said they weren't doing anything and slammed the door in my face. Then she started screaming and yelling with the kids and was louder than they were. In other words, she made it worse on purpose. The noise was ten times worse then and was non-stop. They were also slamming doors as hard as they could. I thought they were tearing the place down.

This was the second time I've had to go next door and ask Stephanie to please be mindful of the noise. Her sister and her two boys visited two weeks ago and did the same thing for three hours, screaming and running up and down the stairs. It sounded like they had ten kids in there. When I knocked on her door and asked her to be mindful of it, she slammed the door in my face. Her excuse was she had children over there and they would try to be more quiet. She's teaching that little 2 yr. old it is okay to behave badly inside, to run and scream to the top of his lungs. He does it now on his own.

And I'm trapped here. Have nowhere to go, especially this time of night.

It was much too late to call the landlord, so I dropped her an email and told her everything above. I wanted something in writing. I've learned this is the best case. She wrote back and said she would speak to her. I'll file that under "we'll repair everything on your list." My back porch light is still in pieces where the guy tried to fix it two weeks ago. He hasn't been back.

So my nerves are shot today. My body is literally shaking all over. This is what happens when I am emotionally upset. My blood pressure is soaring, I'm throwing up, and cannot stop shaking. That is why I really don't want to move into another apartment. Doctors just say I must stay away from the stress because of the aneurysm and lupus. Wish the doctors would find me a home in the country!

I just feel so bad today. It is in the 70's and I can't enjoy it. I'm stuck inside in bed from a horrific lupus flare caused by last night's neighbor problems.

RECAP OF BEDROOM CEILING INCIDENT
***UNBELIEVABLE***
I'm recovering from an odd accident. My bedroom ceiling fell on top of me Sunday. I was walking to the closet to get something out, turned around and the tiles all fell on me, knocked me to the floor and piled on. Had a few cuts on my scalp and face and a concussion. Spent the entire afternoon in the ER. Had a catscan. Sandy spent two days and nights with me to wake me up every few hours because of the concussion.

It is now Thursday and my room is the same as it was on Sunday. Alan's wife came in with someone on Tuesday to get an estimate and said they would let me know. Had to all again today to find out that someone may or may not come on Monday. There is a list of many things wrong with this place. The tiles in my bedroom was on that list and told to him many times.

I'm still in a neck brace, now my back is hurting, can't get rid of the horrible headache, and I'm in bed fending for myself now. See my doctor on Friday and go to the Southern Bone and Joint doctor for my back on Tuesday. I reinjured my back from the fall.

RECAP OF FEB 11
While walking to my bedroom closet this morning, my bedroom ceiling collapsed and fell on me. It dropped me to the floor like a hot rock! I ended up in the emergency room with a mild concusion and a neck brace. Sandy is spending the night to wake me up every two hours. These tiles were put in in 1935 and extremely heavy. Huge pieces are still falling through the day. I called the landlord. No call back. No one came. So typical. Now I have a new prescription and an emergency room visit added to the list!

RECAP OF SUNDAY, FEB. 11, 2006
While walking to my bedroom closet this morning, my bedroom ceiling collapsed and fell on me. It dropped me to the floor like a hot rock! I ended up in the emergency room with a mild concusion and a neck brace. Sandy is spending the night to wake me up every two hours. These tiles were put in in 1935 and extremely heavy. Huge pieces are still falling through the day. I called the landlord. No call back. No one came. So typical. Now I have a new prescription and an emergency room visit added to the list!

NEVER ENDS!
Can you say Epidural from hell? I got the anethesiologist who couldn't find the space between my vertebrae to put the needle this morning. So he gave me four shots of numbing medicine and then spent 20 minutes poking my spine. He said my spine has so many calcium deposits from degeneration it was hard to find a space. Funny. No other one had problems. When he found a space, he inserted the long needle and then had to pull it out. Had to find another space. Another ten minutes. Finally found another one. Gave me the epidural. They give these betwen the spaces in the vertebrae. So I had five shots in my spine this morning. I'm dying in pain today. I was hurting before I left.

When I was wheeled in, it felt like an oven in there. I asked the nurse why it was so hot. I couldn't lie down or even use the blanket because it was way too hot. She said I was just cold natured and they haven't changed the thermostat for three weeks. I reminded her it was 80 degrees outside with high humidity. She said she could get me a wash cloth to cool me down, but couldn't do anything about the temp. I told her heat makes me sick from the lupus and I will throw up when I get sick. Up to her. After about ten minutes, it cooled down a little. She bumped the thermostat down some. Said they had to keep bringing blankets to patients because they were cold. There is a reason why a hospital is cold........keeps germs from spreading. Get a clue!

She brought me an ice pack and pretty much said to deal with it. She was wearing a jacket and was fine. So what? I came so close to putting my clothes back on and going home. After having the epidural experience, I almost did.

After everything else that has happened to me, I should have expected all of this.

Will it EVER end???

HELP!!!!!!!!
I'm on the verge of having a nervous breakdown.

The preacher came over to my door tonight and just chewed me out. Said my cat was on his car. I asked if the cat had a collar and tag. He said it did and then told me what it looked like. Not my cat, but I didn't say anything. He then went on and on about how there were 13 cats in his yard at one time, I don't know when that ever was, and how he had to throw a rug away that was destroyed by cats. I asked if he saw my four cats doing this. He said yes. Last summer he said kittens did it.

Then he threatened me. Said I had to get rid of the cats or he would bring charges against me. Said he has reported me to the city. For FOUR cats??? They eat in the backyard and go on their way or sleep in the backyard that is enclosed in a privacy fence. He is threatening to complain to Alan Clark. In other words, to have him evict me from my home.

I told him I have four cats, all fixed, not able to have kittens. I am not responsible for all the cats in the neighborhood. He is blaming all the cat problems on me. To make it worse, he has also caused the Georges to blame me with cat problems Stephanie went to his house complaining to him that her house has fleas. U All of this is coming from Reese. He and Carolyn keep stirring it seems.

To top it all off, he also stood on my porch and accused me of opening a cage on Friday or Saturday night and letting out a cat. First of all, I didn't. I told him since my car accident a few weeks back I have been unable to walk well and spent Friday night and Saturday in bed on medication. He said I was lying. Kept accusing me. I told him I'm still taking darvocet along with the 20 plus meds I take for lupus and other illness till I have my second epidural this week. I can barely make it to the bathroom with darvocet.

I never bother anyone in this neighborhood. In fact, they've never been friendly here the entire time I've lived here on and off for the past 15 years. The only time they've ever spoken to me has been to complain about something. He has been the worst. I told him what a bad example he left on the lady behind him. He said he didn't care. I told him he represented God. He still didn't care. I told him God created animals and I believe their lives are precious and to be respected. He said animals don't matter. They have no souls. Only people matter. He said I have to get rid of my animals or he will file charges against me. Said I was being selfish toward the entire neighborhood. Yet for me, not one of these neighbors have ever said a kind word to me.

I reminded him since he thought people matter how not once had he invited me to church, how I've been alone without any family and not once had he invited me to his home during any holiday, etc. And what he was doing to someone who was sick, disabled, and alone was far worse than anything I could ever thing. And he is doing this a week before Christmas??

I don't bother anyone, never say a word, have paid my rent on time always. Yet he takes words and twists them so much he has caused all of this trouble over four little lives who eat at my backdoor. And in doing so, has caused so much stress in my life and more progression of my illness. If I did get rid of my cats, others would come across the neighborhood. They would go across his yard. The trap he bought would be out there as it always is 365 days a year as he has been obsessed for at least 15 years now.

I never knew there was a law against feeding four cats.

I Need money to move out of this place. HELP!!

ANOTHER EPIDURAL AND MRI
Had to get out to go to the doctor. She said I may have a ruptured disc from the car accident and is sending me for an MRI next week. The week before Christmas I go back for another epidural.

Monday I see my rheumatologist for lupus. He will have to determine what the huge sores are all over my body.

Just gets better and better.

I just went next door to talk to my neighbor about my theory on the dog bringing fleas from the vet. Of course, she didn't think so. She blamed it on the cats outside as usual. I told her the cats she sees with collars and tags are treated every month so they are not putting fleas in the grass. In fact, they get fleas from the grass. Where does she think fleas come from???? ALL kinds of animals walk through that grass.....squirrels, dogs, BIG STRAY DOGS, and all have fleas. Her child plays in the grass all of the time! Her parents live in the country. They are there the entire weekend. The dog is her source. WHY won't these horrible people leave the cats alone?

If ever there was a financial miracle out there for me to buy a house in the country and move from here, I truly need it now. I feel pushed into a corner from all sides and in the only place I have to call home. Home right now isn't a home. It is a place of stress and hell that causes this horrible disease to do more damage to my body. They are literally killing me.

It NEVER Ends...
This is the worst Christmas since my dad and brother died....

And I finally figured out what happened. She picked up her mom's dog from the vet after he was boarded for a week while they were gone. Dog stayed overnight with her. There's her fleas. Animals come from the vet always have fleas.

Top it off with my neighbor behind me. She hates animals. She wrote me a letter asking me to feed my cats in the backyard. She's the one who has the pound cage up now. Her excuse?? She says it stinks in her yard. They eat and leave into the neighborhood. Don't stay around long enough to use the yard. Cats dig, use the potty and then cover it up. Nothing to smell. Then she goes into a long story about how a cat had kittens in her garage and one fell. Her husband nursed it back to health. He's allergic to cats. She's now on first name basis with the people at the pound. She bought a cage for herself to catch the cats and let them come get them. Said she caught two feral cats (not fixed) last week. She NEVER caught unfixed cats....both were mine and had been fixed. I had to go pick them up. Both Sandy and myself broke into tears before we left there. Rascal was one of the cats I had to pick up. He and Sweetie had on collars. And all of mine are fixed and can't have kittens. I've told her this time and time again.

She also told me not to leave food out once I fed my cats so they won't come around here.

I pay my rent for the house and the yard. Where are my rights?? If I want to feed the cats anywhere in the yard, is it not my right to do so? I can't put them inside with the three I already have. The landlord would have a stroke.

I'm sick sick sick of these stupid people. I don't bother anyone. I don't associate with these people. WHY don't they just leave me alone????? See why I want to move to the country away from people and take these sweet animals with me??? I don't have money to move anywhere. I literally am stuck. Nowhere else in town allows animals.

I have three indoor cats. There are four outdoor cats. All are fixed and have collars and id tags with my number on them. The pound knows about my idiot neighbors. When I have to pick up, they don't charge me.

If this stress doesn't end soon, I'll lose my mind and what's left of my health. Lupus is flaring all over and my back injury from the car injury is back as the epidural didn't take. I just can't take anymore.

Just pray God will protect me from these idiots. I'm so upset that I can't even sleep. I'm trapped. I have nowhere else to go and no family to run to just to escape for awhile. This is my home as bad as it is.

Can't Take It anymore!!!
I can't take anything else....this morning those loose dogs killed my cat...the one I rescued from the pound. And while I was in tears on the phone to Sandy, my landlady knocked on my door. Stephanie next door called them to complain. Said she has fleas in her apartment. Well, I DON"T HAVE FLEAS!!! The baby is getting fleas from her mother's dog at her mother's house!!!!!!!!!!! I just told the landlady I'd put flea treatment on the cats and let it go.

I truly can't take another bad thing happening to me physically or emotionally. I just can't take it.

My Christmas List
My Dear Brother,

You've been gone to Heaven for twelve years now, but since CHristmas is a few weeks away, I think of those days of childhood when I would leave my list for Santa and you would make sure he would fulfill it every year. As I grew, the list did, too. My "Santa" became you. Of course, I never got everything on the list, but I only made a long list just to make you laugh. And you did.

I miss those days.....and I miss you so much. Christmas is so very lonely without you. So I'm making a Christmas list here. I know you can't see it or even fulfill it, but I will make my list. My fun list of frivolous things are over now. Only needs fill this list now. Unfortunately, the needs won't be met either.

Here's my list, dear brother:

1. A 5 inch baffle box feather bed - my mattress is 20 yrs. old and my back is so bad now. A feather bed would help me sleep longer at night. I found one at QVC and wish I could get this one: http://www.qvc.com/qic/qvcapp.aspx/app.detail

2. Someone to clean my yard - It is so very hard for me to rake the mounds of leaves in my yard right now, especially with the terrible back pain. Everyone's yard is clean except for mine. "Help thy neighbor" doesn't exist here.

3. A New sofa - Mine is falling apart. One end is broken. It would be nice to have a wide sofa or a sleeper sofa so that I could sleep downstairs during the summer months when it is impossible to sleep upstairs.

4. Money to make ends meet. I can't even buy food till January 3rd.

5. To live in the country. Peace to live a quiet life. The two go together.

6. To have my brother and dad back. I miss you so much my soul hurts.

7. Love.

Hanging on by a Thread
A lupus flare has set in from the car accident. Can only function two hours a day now. Not even interested in decorating for Christmas.

My normal medical bills are pouring in now, not the ones from the accident, but the ones not covered under my insurance. They sit on the end table just staring at me.

I feel like I'm barely hanging on by a thread.

The Holidays
One down one to go.........I dread Christmas the most. Memories of my family at Christmas are still strong. We didn't have much, but it seemed we were always at peace during Christmas. We always had dinner together. No matter what, we were together. I miss them so very much this time of year.

I'll be alone on Christmas this year. My small tree won't have presents underneath it because there are no family members to share gifts with me. No work parties to attend because I'm pretty much housebound now. No friends to visit because they left when I became ill, except for my best friend who has stuck by me.

Christmas for me is a mind of memories, a heart of aching, and tears of sadness. And it seems the new year holds the same. Nothing goes unchanged. How I pray for good change.

Epidural
My epidural went fine. Flowers Hospital treats patients as patients. Nothing like Medical Center Pain Clinic (see post below!). The pain has started to subside, but my knees are still experiencing pain from the accident. Of course, they never did x-ray them. Even the bone doctor didn't x-ray them. I see my rheumatologist on Dec. 11th and will tell him what happened. He will check it out. I trust him more.

DOCTOR'S UPDATE/EPIDURAL COMING WEDNESDAY
And here we go..........schedule of another epidural on Wednesday morning at 6:45 a.m. I saw a new doctor this morning at Southern Bone and Joint. My doctor was booked till Dec. 12th. I've been in severe back pain since the car accident. Can't sit, lie down, or stand for a long period of time.

The appointment was a waste of time. I went in at 8:30. Was sent to insurance since it was an accident. Took ten minutes. Since I was gone ten minutes, I was bumped back behind two people. So I didn't go back till 10:30.

Then I was told to put on the hospital gown so the doctor could check my spine. She comes in and asks all the questions I answered on the forms in the waiting room. I also have horrible pain in my knees, but the ER did not x-ray them. I asked her to please check them. Instead she hit them with the rubber hammer to check reflexes. She never once touched me let alone checked my spine. She only looked at the x-rays from the hospital and said I need an epidural. Wouldn't even give me pain medication till I could get the epidural. It is the "Suffer till then" routine.

I remember every epidural I've had I would have to call and make sure someone followed through and sure enough had to do the same thing today. When I called, the appointments person told me she had two openings........one Tuesday and one Wednesday. Then it would be two weeks. She said if the doctor's nurse would just call her and skip the red tape she would give me one of those. So I called the doctor's nurse and told her. Did she call them??? NO. I waited two hours and called the appointments person back. Said my sheet just went through insurance and arrived to them. The nurse never called. Both appointments were gone by then, but someone had just called five minutes before and cancelled their Wednesday appointment. So God was looking out for me.

Please say a prayer that the Pain Center has only sane educated compassionate people!!! My last epidural was not a good experience. (read about it below - Third World Epidural)

The hardest part of all of this is wishing I had someone here, not being alone, having someone to help me when I need something. In the ER, Sandy's family came and so did her co-workers. She has a lot of support and I'm so glad she does. It is hard when you are alone and have to do for yourself even when you are sick and hurting because there is no one else to do it. Situations like these just magnify the aloneness.

Just please say a prayer this Wednesday that all goes well. I don't think I can take anything else right now. The holidays will be hard enough to go through!!

NOV. 8TH RECAP - THE CAR ACCIDENT
Sandy and I headed out at 6:00 a.m. Wednesday morning to stand in line for assistance for my electric bill. They do local assistance for the Winter months for Houston County today. Never made it there so I missed out on the assistance.

We were in a traffic accident. A lady came out of nowhere and hit us on the driver's side, spun us around and over a curb, and totaled her car. We barely missed the Barrow's Furniture sign. She sprung her left wrist and arm and I had horrible chest pains. Since I have an aortic aneurysm near my heart and was having chest pains, they called an ambulance. We both ended up in the emergency room.

They took x-rays and a catscan of my chest and my neck and back. No tears on the aneurysm and no fractures in the back or neck, but terrible pain in both. So I did get muscle relaxers and pain meds. I can barely walk and Sandy can't use her left hand or arm. She's in a brace.

They separated us into two different rooms. I went into the cardiac care room. They hooked me up to a heart monitor and left me there. No nurse or doctor for two hours. The machine started beeping and beeped for twenty minutes. I didn't have the nurse call button so I called out "hello! Help!!" No one came in. Nurses passed by, but no one came in. The machine kept beeping. If I had a heart attack, I would have been dead. Finally after twenty minutes of yelling help, someone came in and did just that. Was I indeed in an American hospital??? And in a cardiac Unit???? I was attached to wires and could not get up for help. I didn't have anyone with me. I don't have any family. I was alone. And they left me alone. No one checked on me. The only person I saw was a nurse at the beginning and the doctor two hours later. Then the x-ray guy and the Catscan lady afterwards. I had to beg for pain medicine before I was released. JUST UNBELIEVABLE!!!

Sandy is car - less now that her car is gone completely, totally unreparable. She can't afford a new one so she will be swapping cars back and forth with her sister till she can figure out what to do next.

I'll be on pain meds and doctor follows up for awhile. It hit every joint.

Sandy's foot hit the gas instead of brake so the seatbelt didn't catch and I was bouncing all over the car for awhile. Now paying for the bounce!

I'm not big on holidays especially since I don't have family anymore, but I'm thankful this year to have Sandy and myself make it through this safely.

Please remember HER in your prayers.........she really needs a blessing to come her way for a car!!

Thanksgiving is just a week or so away. May you be thankful for the family and friends who are in your life.

NOV. 8TH RECAP - THE CAR ACCIDENT
Sandy and I headed out at 6:00 a.m. Wednesday morning to stand in line for assistance for my electric bill. They do local assistance for the Winter months for Houston County today. Never made it there so I missed out on the assistance.

We were in a traffic accident. A lady came out of nowhere and hit us on the driver's side, spun us around and over a curb, and totaled her car. We barely missed the Barrow's Furniture sign. She sprung her left wrist and arm and I had horrible chest pains. Since I have an aortic aneurysm near my heart and was having chest pains, they called an ambulance. We both ended up in the emergency room.

They took x-rays and a catscan of my chest and my neck and back. No tears on the aneurysm and no fractures in the back or neck, but terrible pain in both. So I did get muscle relaxers and pain meds. I can barely walk and Sandy can't use her left hand or arm. She's in a brace.

They separated us into two different rooms. I went into the cardiac care room. They hooked me up to a heart monitor and left me there. No nurse or doctor for two hours. The machine started beeping and beeped for twenty minutes. I didn't have the nurse call button so I called out "hello! Help!!" No one came in. Nurses passed by, but no one came in. The machine kept beeping. If I had a heart attack, I would have been dead. Finally after twenty minutes of yelling help, someone came in and did just that. Was I indeed in an American hospital??? And in a cardiac Unit???? I was attached to wires and could not get up for help. I didn't have anyone with me. I don't have any family. I was alone. And they left me alone. No one checked on me. The only person I saw was a nurse at the beginning and the doctor two hours later. Then the x-ray guy and the Catscan lady afterwards. I had to beg for pain medicine before I was released. JUST UNBELIEVABLE!!!

Sandy is car - less now that her car is gone completely, totally unreparable. She can't afford a new one so she will be swapping cars back and forth with her sister till she can figure out what to do next.

I'll be on pain meds and doctor follows up for awhile. It hit every joint.

Sandy's foot hit the gas instead of brake so the seatbelt didn't catch and I was bouncing all over the car for awhile. Now paying for the bounce!

I'm not big on holidays especially since I don't have family anymore, but I'm thankful this year to have Sandy and myself make it through this safely.

Please remember HER in your prayers.........she really needs a blessing to come her way for a car!!

Thanksgiving is just a week or so away. May you be thankful for the family and friends who are in your life.