1. Make sure that you really want to
cut off your thumb. You will be able
to have it reconnected if you take
precautions but it won't work as
well as before.

2. Find a good knife. A large kitchen
knife should work. 

3. Sharpen the knife. A sharper knife
will be able to cut better and cause
you less pain.

4. Pick a thumb. If you are doing this
to disable yourself, pick the thumb
on your dominant hand, the one you write
with. If you are doing this for entertainment
purposes or as a political statement, choose
the thumb on your other hand.

5. Spread a towel out on a flat surface. 
Spread the fingers on the hand you want
to cut as wide as possible and place them 
palm-down on the towel.

6. Bring your non-thumb fingers together
and pull them farther apart from the
thumb. 

7. Balance the knife diagonally over the joint
in your thumb that is second from the thumbnail.
The knife should run parallel to your index
finger.

8. Hold the top of the knife blade steady with
the top of your hand, the hand not being
cut up.

9. Count backwards from five.

10. Press down on the knife with as much
force possible. The knife will crunch 
through the joint and your thumb will stop
being attached to your hand.

11. Use the towel to slow the bleeding. Hold
the towel over the place where your thumb
was. Press down on it.

12. Now that the thumb is off and the bleeding
has been slowed, you require medical assistance.
Call a friend or a taxi service to drive you
to the hospital.

13. Fill a plastic bag with ice and put the
thumb inside.

14. Walk around outside until your ride arrives.

15. Once at the hospital, tell them that you
have removed your thumb and that you would
like a doctor to put it back on for you.