Chapter 13, epilogue

Tonight's concert had definitely been a high point in Kathryn's career. The music was flawless and the kids were spectacular. The Boys made a special point of recognizing her choir and she was so proud she thought she might burst. The arena was empty now, save for the last of the cleanup crew and a few stagehands. Taking one last look around, Kathryn wandered to the center of the bare stage, her heels echoing in the emptiness.

Closing her eyes, she could almost hear the music one last time. Taking a deep breath she began to sing, her voice breaking with emotion.

"Almost paradise
We're knockin' on heaven's door
Almost paradise
How could we ask for more?
I swear that I can see forever in your eyes
Paradise..."

Her strength was gone and she collapsed in an exhausted heap, sobs shaking her frail shoulders. She cried for herself, for AJ and for the future they could never have. A few more hours and he would be gone, out of her life forever. Through her tears she heard the song continue.

"And in your arms salvation's not so far away
It's getting closer,
Closer every day..."

"Alex?" She struggled to her feet, drying her face on her sleeve.

"Kat, don't do this. It doesn't have to be this way."

"But it DOES, don't you see?" she cried, the tears beginning anew.

"No, I DON'T see. All I see is that I found you again and I won't let you go. You have no idea how hard it was for me to talk management into doing this performance tonight."

"What?"

"Kat, this date was nowhere near anything else we had booked. It was out of our way, a smaller venue than the rest of the tour, didn't that seem odd to you?"

"I - I never thought about it, I guess." She sniffed, looking in vain for a tissue. "But how-"

AJ hung his head, choosing his words carefully. "I've always known where you were, Kat. Every move you made, every award you won, every triumph you brought about for your kids... I knew. And I was so damn proud."

"Really?" she asked, her voice weak.

"Yes, really." He stepped forward, resting his hands on her shoulders. "I couldn't forget you. Kat, I've loved you for so long." He breathed deeply. "I need you, Kat. I need you in my life and I won't let it end tonight."

"But-"

"No *buts*, Kathryn. I've done some stupid things over the years, and I'll probably do some more. But the one thing I won't do is to let you walk away from me again. Whatever it takes, we'll fix it. We'll make it work. We have to."

His voice had faded away to almost nothing, and as Kathryn looked into his eyes, she was stunned to find them overflowing. Wiping the tears away with her thumbs, she pulled him closer, pressing a soft kiss to his mouth. "I love you too, Alex. Help me make this right."

"Just tell me you'll be with me, Kat, that I don't have to wake up alone again tomorrow. Or the next day ..."

"Never again, Alex. Never again."

------------------------------------

It was 3 a.m. The last door was locked, the last light extinguished and the last bus was ready to pull out from the arena. The lights were dimmed as security counted their charges. All present and accounted for. Plus one.

"And all these dreams I saved for a rainy day
They're finally coming true
I'll share them all with you
'Cause now we hold the future in our hands
Almost paradise..."

7-10-01