A NEW DAY by Michelle T © 2000 CHAPTER FOURTEEN "I need to know if we are really okay?" she looked up at him. He led her over to bed and they both sat down. "Michelle, I'm still not feeling great about last night. Like I said, I'm full of guilt, but, again, I can't deny I didn't enjoy it." He said slowly. "Me too, Kev. But……I don't know where this is coming from, but, I need you! Not sexually, but I need you in my life as my friend too. You're the first person I've connected with since I got out of the hospital. You and AJ were the first people to actually care about me without knowing me or judging me first. You could have just driven on by or left me at my hotel, but you didn't. You stayed with me, a complete stranger, and you took care of me, and of my baby." Tears were streaming down her cheeks. "You've comforted me, you've listened to me, and…….you made me feel loved last night." Kevin wrapped his arms around her tightly. "God Michelle, I'll never leave you, I promise. I need you too, you know? For sixteen months I've lived with the guilt of my suicide attempt. Like you, I've been getting help from therapists, but there's been something missing. They can all sit there and nod their heads at me while I try to explain my actions, they can give me solutions to ensure I don't slip backwards, but they can't give me what I think, what I know, you can give me. And that's a soul mate, someone who understands totally and can bring me peace." he closed his eyes tightly and hugged her fiercely. They were both silent for several moments, just taking comfort from being in each other's arms. Michelle started singly very softly: I'll be the one... I guess you were lost when I met you Still there were tears in your eyes So out of trust and I knew No more than mysteries and lies Kevin took over, just as softly: There you were, wild and free Reachin' out like you needed me A helping hand to make it right I am holding you all through the night Michelle joined him again: I'll be the one Who will make all your sorrows undone I'll be the light When you feel like there's nowhere to run I'll be the one... Michelle stopped and listened to Kevin's beautiful voice, as he continued. To hold you and make sure that you'll be all right 'Cause my faith is gone And I want to take you from darkness to light There you were, wild and free Reachin' out like you needed me A helping hand to make it right I am holding you all through the night You need me like I need you We can share our dreams comin' true I can show you what true love means Just take my hand, baby please I'll be the one I'll be the light Where you can run To make it alright I'll be the one I'll be the light Where you can run I'll be the one I'll be the light Where you can run To make it alright I'll be the one I'll be the light Where you can run To make it all right I'll be the one To hold you And make sure that you'll be alright I'll be the one Michelle gave Kevin one last squeeze and pulled away. "God, I'm sorry Kevin, I just ruined an absolutely beautiful song with my caterwauling." Kevin laughed at her and said, "That's our song from now on. Just keep it in mind. We'll get out of here tomorrow and take a walk or something and talk more, ok?" Michelle nodded her head "Ok," she drew in a deep breath and stood up before him. "but, God, Kevin, you really need a shower. What the hell have you been doing? And what the hell is that on your cheek bone!" she gently touched his slightly swollen cheek. He winced slightly and smiled, "Our good buddy AJ popped me one in the gym this morning when I told him about last night!" "Oh my god!" whispered Michelle and then she cracked up laughing. "Hey, I don't think its funny!" Kevin said trying to look serious, but he started laughing too. "Kevin, just go, I'm about to pass out from your stinkiness." It took Michelle well over an hour to shower, shampoo and get dressed. The worse part was trying to clasp her bra just using her left hand and the fingertips of her right hand. She gave up on trying to do anything with her hair, except blow drying it and leaving it loose. She decided to dress better than her normal jeans and shorts, after all it was Thanksgiving and she needed to brighten her mood, so she chose a long thin white skirt covered with thousands of tiny dark blue flowers, with a matching solid blue square-necked, sleeveless top. When she finally emerged from the bedroom, she noticed how quiet the suite was. As she stood looking around she heard someone in the kitchenette and went in. Howie was sitting at the counter reading some paperwork. "Hi Howie," she said with a beautiful smile. "Wow, look at you!" he jumped off his stool and went over to her. He put his arms on her shoulders and said, "You look gorgeous!" She laughed and said "And you, Sweet D, look even more gorgeous than usual." She looked him over thinking how any man could be any more beautiful. He had on tailored black slacks, a crisp white shirt and a burgundy tie. "What's the occasion?" "Well, it is a holiday. We've made reservations for the seven of us for dinner downstairs, for one o'clock. Where's the bandage on your hand?" he asked. "Oh, well, try as I did, I couldn't keep it from getting wet in the shower, so I just took it off. I was going to ask if Kevin could rewrap it. Where is everybody, again?" she said as he guided her out of the kitchen. "Kevin and AJ went to check out your car and make sure it was taken care of. Kimberly begged to go with them and, I think, Brian went with them. Nick went back to bed." Howie drew on his suit jacket and said, "We can run down to Carey's room and see if he'll redo your hand, ok?" "Ok," She walked back into her room and scooped up a small hand bag. Half hour later, Howie and Michelle were thanking Carey for his assistance and urging him and his wife to join their group for dinner. Carey and Karolyn begged off and said they had already made plans for a quiet celebration just for the two of them. When they got to the lobby, Michelle went into the gift shop, while Howie went to check on their reservations. Michelle bought a pack of menthol cigarettes and rejoined Howie. "D, I'm going outside for a bit, to smell the fresh air and feel the sun on my face, ok? I'll be back soon." "Do you want company?" Howie asked concerned. "No, thanks for offering though……..ok, truth is I'm going out for a cigarette and I don't want to see any disapproval from you!" Michelle said slightly blushing. "Michelle, how could I disapprove of anything you do?" he replied so sweetly. Michelle was silent for a moment, thinking wildly. "Please Howie, you're pushing the Sweet D act a little too far here. You don't know how easily I could make you disapprove of me. From what I've read and heard about you, I'm sure a few of my beliefs and ideas would not be to your liking." Michelle's tone had gotten louder and harsh. She stopped herself, wondering what brought this on. She looked over at Howie and saw the hurt look in his eyes. "Howie, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it to sound like that." She turned and walked quickly out of the hotel. Howie stared after her in confusion. Brian appeared at his side and said, "What's wrong, D?" Howie shrugged his shoulders and looked at Brian, "I have no idea, she suddenly got pissed at me and left." "Well, man, don't even think about it. She's had a rough couple of days and probably just needed to spout off to someone. Come on, let's have a drink at the bar before dinner." Brian pulled Howie off into the lounge.