Still reeling after sharing a very unexpected, very passionate kiss, Destiny and AJ stood in her living room surrounded by an awkward silence. Neither of them had planned for anything like that to happen. They were both shocked at their own behavior as well as that of the other. They hadn't expected it, nor could they explain it. One minute they'd been standing there talking. The next they were in each other's arms engrossed in an overwhelmingly powerful kiss.
They stood there; neither moving nor speaking. Every time one of them would open their mouth to speak, the words would escape them. AJ looked at Destiny, watching her expression, searching for signs, but found none. She watched his big brown eyes, looking for any kind of answer in them, but saw none.
AJ could feel his heart pounding in his chest, battling with himself over whether to take her in his arms as he so wanted or to just let things go. His arms still tingled from having her in them mere minutes before. He could still taste her kiss on his lips, feel her arms around him, her fingers in his hair. In that moment, he had wished it would last forever. He could've died a happy man right then and there. In the arms of the angel he dreamed about. He hadn't revealed his feelings to her, but hoped she could read them in that kiss. Surely, she could, he thought.
What am I doing?? Destiny asked herself that question over and over in her mind. This is so wrong! So, why does it feel so right? Why did it feel so natural to be in his arms? To feel his soft lips on mine? The pure electricity of his touch? The raw emotion that had so obviously been there between us? Was all that wrong, too? What had come over her, rendering her powerless against him? Why hadn't she been able to resist him? Not only that, she had reciprocated his actions.... with great intensity and unbelievable desire.
Taking a deep, cleansing breath, AJ finally mustered enough courage to speak. He raised his gaze to look at her and opened his mouth to speak. But, when his eyes met hers, he saw the passion they still held. Without so much as a sound, he closed the distance between them and pulled her back into his arms.
A soft moan of futile resistance escaped her lips as his strong arms held her tightly against his frame. Destiny could feel his warm breath on her lips as he hushed her.
"Don't," he whispered. "Don't say a word."
She felt her knees begin to buckle as his lips came down over hers. Never before had a mere kiss affected her so. There seemed to be a power, an unknown force that drew them to each other. Something too powerful for either of them to resist.
She drew in a quick breath as she felt his hot mouth leaving a trail of kisses down her neck, his strong hands holding her in place against his body. She could feel his breath on her now moist skin as she slid her hand up the back of his neck, pulling him even closer.
AJ was alarmed at the way his body, and his emotions were responding to Destiny's touch. He could feel her fingers brush lightly against his skin as her hand slipped underneath the back of his tshirt. After tracing small circles on his back with her fingertips, he shivered as she brought both hands around under the front of his shirt, placing them firmly on his chest.
He kissed his way back up the opposite side of her neck, stopping at her ear. Taking a moment to catch his breath, he began to whisper softly.
"You know you can stop me if you don't want this," he muttered through ragged breaths.
She didn't answer.... not with words. With her hands, she raised his head to look at her. Without speaking, she kissed his lips.... softly at first, then growing in intensity. Understanding just what she was saying, AJ scooped her up into his arms and carried her to the bedroom. He gently laid her back on the huge bed, his body coming down to cover hers. The things that were being said between them as their eyes locked, no words, no sounds, were the most beautiful things either of them had ever heard. Things that couldn't be defined or described
Destiny raised her head and placed a soft kiss on his neck, tasting his sweet skin. She could hear his moans of approval as she lightly traced her tongue to connect the kisses she'd left.
AJ slowly raised up, pulling his shirt, which was now soaked with sweat, over his head and tossing it to the side. She instinctively reached out to touch his glistening skin, her fingers tracing around his nipples, sending ripples of pleasure throughout his body. He slid his hands under her and raised her just enough for her to pull her dress over her head, exposing enough of her body to make him weak.
In his eyes, at that moment, Destiny saw something she'd never seen in any man's eyes. Something so real, so true, so powerful. Too powerful. Knowing right away what she'd just seen, she was instantly paralyzed. How can this be? How can I see a love such as this so clearly in his eyes when Nick is my one.... my only one?
"I'm sorry, AJ. I can't do this," she said, gently pushing him away and jumping up to grab her dress. He didn't speak until she had dressed and turned back to face him.
He walked up to her, lifted her chin with his finger, looked into her eyes full of fear and said, "Don't be sorry. I'm not. And don't be afraid. I know what you saw. I saw it, too. It IS real. Don't doubt that. But, it will wait until you're ready."
Destiny watched him get dressed and walk out. After hearing his car leave, she collapsed across the bed in tears, so confused it hurt to even think.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
About 5 miles away from Destiny's house, AJ pulled into an old abandoned parking lot, laid his seat back, closed his eyes, and allowed the music from his stereo to fill his mind. But, thoughts of the angel he'd just held still drifted through his thoughts as song after song played.
* "Here I am
I'm in your warm bed again
It's a game I just can't win...."
Shaking his head, tears welling up in his eyes, AJ softly said, "Tell me about it."
"There you are
Breathing soft on my skin
Still, you won't let me in...."
As the chorus of the song began, the tears began to fall like rain. He could no longer control them, and didn't really care any more.
"Why save your kisses for a rainy day?
Baby, let the moment take your heart away....
Have you ever needed someone so bad?
Have you ever wanted someone you just couldn't have?
Did you ever try so hard
That your world just fell apart?
Have you ever needed someone so bad?...."
"Oh yeah. Yes I have," he whispered, wiping the tears away.
"But, you're the girl I gotta have
I gotta have you, baby...."
Those words hit him like a brick wall. It was suddenly so clear what he had to do. He knew he had found the key to his happiness, the key to his life. This time he wouldn't settle for less than he deserved. He wanted the whole damn fairy tale, and by God, he was gonna have it!
"And if my time don't ever come
For me, you're still the one
Damned if I don't, damned if I do
I gotta get a fix on you...."
"My time will come," he said, trying to reassure himself, though he knew he had a lot to battle before then. All he knew was he would go through anything to make this dream come true. To make her his angel.
"Have you ever needed someone so bad?
Have you ever wanted someone you just couldn't have?
Did you ever try so hard
That your world just fell apart?
Have you ever needed someone so bad?"*
As the song went off, he pondered the question a few minutes longer. Have I ever needed someone like that? That badly? No, I don't think I have. Do I need HER that badly? Taking a long moment to think before answering himself, a big smile crossed his face as he remembered the beauty of her face. More than air, he thought. More than anything.