"Jade, would you like me to come to the doctor with you? I can call my nanny to take care of the kids. It won't be any problem."
I heard Ravens' words echo in my head. I was scared; and although I didn't tell Raven that I was going in for a CAT scan, she knew that there was something bothering me.
My body was stiff, as I lay on that cold metal. The doctor told me things like I couldn't move and how long it would take. His voice seemed so far away as I questioned what the CAT scan would reveal. My family doctor had told me that it would take three day to get the results. THREE DAYS! I could go insane with worry in three days. Nick was due home tonight. What would I tell him? Should I tell him that today I had to have the CAT scan and make him worry? Should I not tell him until I know the results? And then it hit me; did I really want to tell him at all?
He was my husband, and yes, we did have a son together, but did I really want him to rush home to be by my side and treat me like an invalid? And secondly, did I really want him to know, knowing that he would treat me as if I would break if he touches me? I thought about these things and I heard the technician butt into my thoughts.
"You can open your eyes now, Mrs. Carter."
Before I left the room I made a decision, I was not going to tell Nick, come what may. I didn't want him to worry, I didn't want anyone to fuss over me, and I just didn't want the hassle.
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I didn't hear the car or the front door, so when Nick appeared at Chase' bedroom door I jumped.
"You scared the shit out of me! Don't do that again." I glanced at my watch, "you're home early." I turned back around to pick Chase out of the crib and I felt strong arms around my hips.
"I wanted to spend time with my family. Is that so wrong?" I kissed Chase on the cheek, "daddy's home."
Nick pulled the baby out of my arms to hug him. \
"How's my little man?" He cooed back at Nick and smiled.
I left the two boys in the room and headed down to find Nick's duffle bags. I knew that all of his clothes needed to be washed and no better time than the present. I grabbed them and headed into the utility room.
As I closed the lid to the washer I heard feet shuffling around. "I say",arms around my waist again, "that we do something. What do you suggest?"
I leaned back against his chest, which was solid from always being at the gym. He was one of the most self-conscious people I had ever met when it came to his body.
I turned in his arms, "do we have to go out? I just want to spend some quiet time with you and Chase. I also have to do your laundry. Besides, when was the last time you had a home cooked meal?"
He smiled at the thought, "not in a long time. I want one of those fattening meals that I have been missing out on. From the looks of it you are missing out on them too."
He tried to `pinch an inch' but there was nothing to grab a hold of.
"Actually it looks like you haven't been eating anything."
I sighed, "I just really haven't had that much of an appetite lately. It comes and it goes. When that time of the month comes, then I will be as fat as a cow."
Nick rolled his eyes. He was right; I was losing an obscene amount of weight. When we first met I was about twenty-five pounds overweight and now I was about sixty pounds underweight. I didn't want to talk about my weight, so I veered off the subject asking him what fattening meal he wanted. I watched as Nick stepped back to think about that and I knew I would make him forget. The topic of home cooked meals could make him forget his own name.