Peace, Love
&
Bass

peace love and bass...hahahahaha..funny zine..LoLhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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eace love and bass...hahahahaha..funny
zine..LoLhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
   LoL       i
   ii   founder: BexXx    co-founder: Mel   ii
   ii # of subbies: 600+ a humor zine ii
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   heya* questions* comments*
   * seein' 2x * sub-a-bud * unsub
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}><o> o

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Welcome
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eace love and bass...hahahahaha..funny zine..LoLhhhhhhhhh

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We won't bite
   we promise
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BexXx

Ever wondered what BexXx looks like?
Well...now ya know!

Wassup Y'all?
It's me...BexXx, and for my Welcome note this week...I wanted to share something with you, which Mel and I found pretty damned funny.

This morning (2/5) the AOL welcome screen had a really decent picture of JC very prominently displayed.
So there was Mr. "Thug Appeal"...and right below his picture was THIS caption:

"Nsync's JC CHAVEZ"

So me, being the smartass I am...*And admit it, y'all LOVE me for it!*
I went to the AOL Message Board attached to the picture, and posted a message saying simply...
"Okay? Because it's CHASEZ!"
This afternoon, when I get back on...I have the following email in my mailbox:

Subj: JC Chasez Misspelling
Date: 2/5/2001 8:58:32 AM Pacific Standard Time
From: TheMusicEditor
To: TheMusicEditor
BCC: BexXxPLB
Dear AOL Member/*NSYNC Fan:

Thanks to all of you who caught the misspelling of JC Chasez's name on Welcome Screen. As soon as the mistake was reported, it was corrected as swiftly as possible. Our sincerest apologies to the fans, the band and JC.

Sincerely,

The AOL Music team

Well THANK YOU "AOL Music team"...because you KNOW I was just over here Steaming Mad, and offended as hell at the fact that even YOU can't get JC's last name right!
I've met girls who've been fans for YEARS who still can't say it right!
Whatever...*snickers* It was good for a laugh!
See? Even the people at AOL have senses of humor!
One more thing...if you haven't gone to check out our sponsoring website yet...then WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR PEOPLE!?!?!?
Olivia, Lucky & Alli are the BOMB, aiight? *MAD props to my girl, Alli for supplying us with this kick-ass new layout! *
So head on over to Everybody's Free and make sure you sign the guestbook and let em know that PLB sent ya!
ENJOY THE ISSUE!!!
~*~BexXx~*~

Mel

This is Mel...And I want her hair...aint she cute? =)

Hola mis compadres! How y'all been? Super spiffy, I hope. So, y'all excited about the new tour dates? I hope the guys make a stop near you and hope you get tickets! I'll be making the 3 hour trek to Jackson, MS along with my pal Melissa to see the show. We got section B, row 38. I have no idea whether or not they will be good seats. Let us cross our fingers! Hey, and if yer going to the show in Jackson, drop me a line and maybe we can meet up. Anyways, hope you all had a good Valentine's Day. I got balloons and a homemade card and a poem. No friggin chocolate though... what the hell's that about? Hmmm.... well, enough of my mindless blabbering... read on!

Love
Mel

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Top Tens
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eace love and bass...hahahahaha..funny zin e..LoLhhhhhhhhh

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y is 10 funnier
than 1, Dave?
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Top Ten
Things You Can Say To Lance To Start Your Very Own NSYNC Lawsuit!
By BexXx & Mel

Last week, we merely tapped the surface of things you could say to an NSYNC member to get your own lawsuit started. This week, we compiled a list of things that would piss off Lance enough for him to sue you. (You better walk softly and carry a big stick. He looks kind of mad. See? He's even pointing at you. Your ass is next, buddy!)

10. "I've always liked Avon better than Mary-Kay Anyway!"

9. "Hey Lance, WHERE'S TOBY???"

8. "Louisiana could kick Mississippi's ass ANYDAY!"

7. "Lance, You believe in God...Go to AA."

6. "Hard Lemonade is for PANSIES!"

5. "Give it up already...Britney will NEVER like you...Let alone sleep with you!"

4. "Since you have your own film company now, how about taking the lead role in a sequel to the movie, "Powder"?

3. "Hey, Adam called...he wants his apple back!"

2. "Hey Lance, remember the case of the missing cell phone? That was me!"

And the number one thing you could say to Lance to start your very own NSYNC lawsuit is...

*

*

*

1. "That dress looks better on JC anyway!"

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   Who Let Tha BexXx Out
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eace love and bass...hahahahaha..funny zin e..LoLh hhhhhhhh

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   bump dat ish
   BexXx is wild

This Week's title:
"Shake Dat Ass...Watch Yerself!"

Wassup my "Rock `N Rollers and Out of Controllers???"
*Note the reference to the Super Bowl show? Thought ya would!*

Last week, I used my little corner of the world here to discuss Justin's obsession with crotch-grabbing...Followed by a lovely pictorial study of how it's rubbing off *giggles* on the other 4 guys.

THIS week...I wanna go BACK, if you will...Take a step to the REAR, and view things from BEHIND.

I am here, faithful humor-lovers, to discuss something very close to my heart...

NSYNC ASS!

Yes folks, it's the NSYNC ASS! It slices, it dices, it makes Julliene Fries!
Hell, it even "Shakes all around!"
And my GOD is it nice to look at...

What I've decided to do, is an ass-by-ass critique of each member of Nsync...

Starting of course with my FAVORITE ass in the world...

I am proud to present to you, for your viewing pleasure...
The LANCE ASS...

*drools*
Mmmm...To quote Sir Mixalot...
"I like big Butts and I cannot lie!"
Isn't that lovely? God, it's a work of art!

Now for the JUSTIN ASS...

I dunno, it's by no means The LANCE ASS...but it's cute!
Firm...Almost Pocket-sized...
I think Ju had a wedgie in this picture...

Now...we take the trek from "Southern Ghetto Booty"
To "Oh My God! Where IS Your Booty????"
May I present...
The JC ASS...

I must say, it looks MUCH more rounded and supple than it did in person...
Usually from behind, the man looks like a 2 by 4.
Maybe he's been doing those "Buns of Steel" workouts, after all!
YOU GO JC!

LOOK! UP IN THE SKY! IT'S AN AIRCRAFT CARRIER...
NO, IT'S THE GOODYEAR BLIMP...
Oh Wait...
That's just...
The JOEY ASS!

My god man...Do you PURPOSELY hide a matching set of Christmas Hams in your pants???
THAT ass needs it's own zip-code!
9021-OH MY GOD!

And Last...and yes, probably least...
The CHRIS ASS...

This reminds me of what it might look like if you were to frisk Ernie, the Keebler Elf...
And as my friend, Hal was so kind to point out...
He looks like he split his pants.
Maybe there's more to the CHRIS ASS than meets the eye?

That's it for this week folks!
I hope you enjoyed our look at NSYNC ASS!
If you have any questions/comments, or anything that you would like me to go off about in this section...Please feel free to email me!
Keep Keepin' On! }><O>
BexXx

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   Pic of Da Week
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   eace love and bass...hahahahaha..funny zin e..LoLh

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best of the best ii
      jealous much? ii
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*with Commentary by Mel & BexXx*

Okay y'all...apparently, this ISN'T new. *It was to BexXx, seeing as how she nearly had a coronary from laughing so hard when she first saw it!*
Mels and I had such a good time poking fun at this picture though, *Or should I call it a collage of manliness?* that we decided to post our IM conversation here for all of you to enjoy!

Mel:     Chris's head is so funny! Its like, he's the good conscience that pops up to the side saying... "Weaaaaar your clooooooothes!"
BexXx:     I still think they look like they're auditioning for a diaper commercial...
"Huggies Supreme! Now with RHINESTONES!"
"Say 'Bye Bye Bye' to leakage!"
Mel:     "And there are No Strings Attached here, kiddos. Huggies Supreme with Rhinestones now feature baby blue velcro!"
BexXx:     "Collect them all!"
Mel:     "Yes, NSYNC really DO sleep together"
BexXx:     Half-NAKED even!
Mel:     With smiles on their faces...
And notice their lower regions aren't shown?:
BexXx:     Those butt shots were always embarrasing anyway...
Mel:     I wonder if chris is.... and that's why they're smiling or what? nevermind..
BexXx:     Lookit how cozy Joey looks...
Mel:     Maybe they needed to go to a photo shoot and they couldn't drag JC's ass out of bed, so they all piled up in there with him and smiled
BexXx:     And got naked, WHY?
Mel:     It's scary!
BexXx:     **Wants to comment on how JC looks like he's lying on Lance's back...but won't**
Mel:     it looks like lance got chris's head tattooed on his shoulder
BexXx:     Maybe he DID!
*plans to check out Lance's bare shoulder next time she gets a chance...*
BexXx:     And Justin...
He's no more than, what? TWELVE there???
Mel:     cause there is a body up above justin that's missing a head
Mel:     and they all have on jewelry
BexXx:     Hey man...can't take off tha Bling!
Not even for underage porn...

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   Mel's      Corner
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Kick it one time ii
     For the people ii

Celebrity Spelling Bee

If you've read any of our previous material, you know that we are always wondering about really stupid stuff. (I mean, REALLY stupid stuff) We are constantly putting NSYNC in "What If?" scenarios. Well, we also wondered... What if NSYNC did a celebrity spelling bee? Mel took the idea and ran with it. This is what she came up with. Maybe it's an accurate representation? We'll probably NEVER know.

Announcer: Welcome to our first annual celebrity spelling bee. With us, we have the 5 guys of N Sync. (Sorry, these guys will have to do. BSB had a scheduling conflict... apparantly waxing their chest is more important... bah whatever.) So, guys, introduce yourselves and your "charities."

Justin: Yo yo yo, wazzup in heah wit all muh foiiiine peepz. I be repazen'en fo de PIMPIN (Pay In My Peroxide Invoice Now) Foundation.

JC: Hey I'm JC and I'm representing the SLEEP (Snooze, Laze, Eat, Entertain, Pee) Association

Lance: Howdy y'all. I'm Lance and I'm playin' for thuh MOMMA (Maxing Out My Manly Ass) Organ-I-zation

Joey: Hey kids.... I mean... uh... hey I'm Joey and I'm here for the FLIRTY (Feisty, Luscious Italians Ravaging Today's Youth) Company

Chris: Hey yo! I'm Chris and I'm here to play for the INSULT (I Need Some Underage Lovin' Too) Group

Announcer: Very well then. Okay, you guys know how this works (I hope). I'll give you a word to spell. You then: say the word, spell it, then say it again. It's very simple. You hear that Chris? VERY SIMPLE.

Chris: HUH WHAT? I HAVE A PIMPLE? WHERE?

Announcer: Oh Lord, help us....

Justin: Aiight, sall good yo. Lez go.

Announcer: Uh.. right.. O-KAY. Justin, your first word is "chia"

Justin: "Chia" C-H-E-A-H "Chia"

Announcer: No, I'm sorry, that's incorrect.

Justin: Wait wait wait, hod up hod up yo. I gotsta be right yo! Lemme use it in a sennence fo you. "If you lookin fo de lovin, ladies, look no furdah cuz it's all RIGHT CHEAH!"

Announcer: *looking at the judges* The judges are telling me they're letting this one slide, but KEEP the BLEACH away from your HEAD from now on Justin. Moving on... JC, how do you spell "fun"?

JC: *snoring*

Announcer: Okayyy, we'll accept that... I think. Lance, you're up. How do you spell "afar"?

Lance: "Afar" A-F-I-R-E "Afar"

Announcer: Uhmm... no Lance, no.. that's wrong.

Lance: Huh? No it ain't. Let me cler-fy. "Them big red trucks with them big ol warter hoses is whart puts out afar"

Announcer: Okay Lance... you just... yeah... okay. Nevermind. Joey, it's your turn. How do you spell "enjoyment"?

Joey: F-I-F-T-E-E-N-Y-E-A-R-O-L-D-G-I-R-.....

Announcer: *interrupting abruptly* OKAY, I THINK we get it. And no, that's wrong... very wrong. Sorry, go away, you're disqualified. Chris, your go. Spell "the" for us. *Joey shrugs and walks off doing a lousy Superman impersonation*

Chris: What? Talk louder, Sonny. I can't hear you.

Announcer: "THE!!!!!"

Chris: Talk louder, there lad. I'm an old man.

Announcer: "THE THE THE THE THE THE"

Chris: Ohhhhh.... okay. "See" S-E-E "See"

Announcer: *Shaking his head hopelessly* No Chris.. that's incorrect.

Chris: No! I am NOT impotent!!!!

Announcer: Can someone please take this guy to the nursing home? Justin, ugh, okay, you're up again. *Chris is being dragged away kicking and screaming about his virility*

Justin: Yo yo yo yo homeeeeez!

Announcer: Spell "nachos"

Justin: Aww dude, datso eeeeeeeeasy. "Nachos" N-O-T-Y-O-Z "Nachos"

Announcer: What the hell??? ... No Justin, that's not right.

Justin: No way dude, you be all trippin yo! Of cose iz right. Lemme demonscrate "You best not be touchin muh Benz cuz iz mine and NOTYOZ!"

Announcer: *Groans* Whatever butters your popcorn, Justin. JC, how do you spell "fun"?

JC: *drooling on his pillow*

Announcer: Okay, I'm down to two judges now. But we can accept that? Yes, we can accept that. Lance, your turn again. How do you spell "ado"?

Lance: "Ado" I-D-O "Ado"

Announcer: Lance? *shaking his head* Have you ever heard of Shakespeare? As in, "Much Ado About Nothing"?

Lance: Now that thur don't make a bit of sense.

Announcer: *Getting very frustrated* What Lance? What doesn't make sense? It's a title.. A TITLE!

Lance: You said "Much I Do About Nuttin" Now tell me why I'd be doin' a lot about nuttin. You ain't too sharp.

Announcer: Lance... nothing....moving on to Justin again. Your word is "odyssey."

Justin: Coolz yo, here I go! "Odyssey" O-U-G-H-T-A-S-E-E "Odyssey"

Announcer: Justin!!! Get your head out of your friggin... okay....remember what the therapist said... breathe deep. Justin, would you mind explaining your reasoning for that idiotic answer?

Justin: Iz simple man. I got dis crunk essample fo you. Lissen to dis. "I know y'all is tied of my hair assessorees, but man you OUGHTSEE da bling bling on dis new bandana yo!"

Announcer: Okay... we're down to one judge and myself. I'm fading fast here. Dare I continue? *takes 2 Valium* JC... how do you spell "fun"?

JC: *mumbling something about Big Macs and "hold the pickle" in his sleep*

Announcer: Yeah JC... that's right, but "hold the pickle" is Joey's line. Sheesh. Lance? You ready for the next word?

Lance: I shooooore am

Announcer: Your word is "tarred"

Lance: "Tarred" T-I-R-E-D "Tarred"

Announcer: *Screams in a fit of rage* NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! NO, that is NOT right. Dare I even ASK your explanation for this one?

Lance: I reckon I'm getting tarred of you actin stoopid.

Announcer: *Throws down his judging sheet* DISQUALIFICATION! Somebody take this moron back to Hickville or Oz or wherever the hell he came from!

Lance: Okay, I'll go to Mississippi... cuz I'm from Mississippi.. yeah... Mississippi...cuz I'm FROM thar. *wanders off, mumbling about Mississippi*

Announcer: Justin, let's just get this over with. Spell "fascinate" and make it snappy, pretty boy.

Justin: "Fascinate" F-A-S-T-E-N-E-I-G-H-T "Fascinate"

Announcer: *In Tears* Why, God? Why? Why???

Justin: BUT HOD UP YO! I gotcha a phrase fo dis one too ya know. Cuz I'm smoooove like dat. "See I gots dis jacket wif 9 but-uhns, but one ovda but-uhns iz missin so, now I can only fasten eight"

Announcer: *Knocks Justin out with a clip board* Now I understand why Britney asked us to hit her one more time! AUGHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *assumes the fetal position and sucks his thumb*

And JC? We all know he's still asleep.

The End

Who do you think rightfully deserves to be the winner of the spelling bee? The outcome will be determined by YOU! Click on the appropriate name below to send in who YOU think should win! Oh, and to keep it fair, only vote once. Multiple entries will be deleted.

x. JUSTIN .x
x. LANCE .x
x. JOEY .x
x. JC .x
x. CHRIS .x
x. THE ANNOUNCER .x
x. BRITNEY SPEARS .x
x. YOU .x
x. ME .x
x. SUPERMAN .x
x. JOE LIEBERMAN .x
x. STINKY CHEESE MAN .x
x. OTHER - PLEASE SPECIFY .x

Hahahahaha, I can't help but notice how that design looks like a voodoo doll or something. Hahahahahahahahahaha. Okay, I don't get out much, sorry...

Wanna Laugh More?
Onward to Page 2!!!

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