How
Do We Cope With Stress?
Coping Methods 
Active
Changing the source,
Confronting the person,
Talking with someone
Passive
Ignoring the source.
Leaving the situation
Drinking, overeating, taking drugs
Coping includes physical, thought, behavior, and social methods. Coping methods include progressive muscle relaxation, deep breathing, problem solving, rethinking, increasing assertiveness, and developing and using social supports.
Coping methods allow you to adapt to stressful situations, and decrease the physical and mental stress response. People who use more active methods cope better.
Active methods include problem solving, rethinking, changing cues, changing your routine, and seeking support.
Passive methods are more avoidance oriented, and include denial, acceptance, emotional discharge, replacing losses, and seeking rewards elsewhere.
Active methods work best with controllable stressors; avoidance may work best with uncontrollable stressors.
Using a combination of coping methods works best. Seeking information and problem solving are helpful in managing both acute and chronic stressors. You need to learn, practice, and have available a variety of coping methods.
When people undergo crises, then learn how to handle stress better. To paraphrase the German philosopher Nietsche, “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.” Many Christians believe that we are not given burdens more than we can bear. No matter what your personal beliefs are, the bottom line is that you are a resourceful, clever and intelligent creature, a survivor, a Human Being!
Remember the Serenity prayer, so often heard at 12-Step Meetings: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
