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Back :: 25.November.2003 7:39pm Moving forward Lol. My Birthday is tomorrow! Hmm usually come this time of the year, I would be lamenting on how all my birthdays were miserable or that nobody ever remembers them. And it doesn't help that the day always falls right near the end of the exams period and so the usual excuses would be "Oh I'm sorry but you must understand exams lah" Well, I WAS lamenting on how the days around my birthdays were bad a few days ago, especially with the stress from my exams. But then today, I realized maybe thing wasn't that bad this year, or is it the same for all the other years except I had looked at them differently? Was making up a list of things that I should be thankful for and realized that, yeah, life might not be sweet like honey but its darkly beautiful like one particular day on the Great Ocean Drive. Here's the list I made up: Got a new bunch of friends from my theatre production last semester. On a scale of 10, they rocked my world at around 9.:P Well, what can I say they are mature, cool, nice and all in all good friends material! Found my first love. Might not be the last (I ain't Nostradamus) but its a cozy feeling at the moment being with her and for now that is perfectly alright.:) Finally developed some interest in my course and I was thinking to myself, maybe I can really put my heart into this thing. So the future isn't so uncertain after all. Between theatre and my course that's a lot of choices, don't you think? :P Hmm life could definitely be alright right at this moment, I think.
19.November.2003 6:20pm I'm a naughty little boy. Free Sex Here!! Lol. Just trying to screw up the search results of million of guys out there;P
19.November.2003 11:47am perfection is an imaginary word.. Lately, I have been behaving like a brat. Demanding attention, pouting, having silly antics and basically making an irritant out of myself. I guess you would slap me if you were here bearing the brunt of my actions. Hell I would too. Hmm, I did do some reflecting, in a clear-headed but out-of-the-body kind of way, and I could see the thought processes that lead to my actions. Sadly, the mind, in this case, is weaker than the body. *#@@!% It is official, I am not perfect. Sometimes, people have a certain expectation of you or on your own you have set some lofty goals that you must reach. Alas, we are only human. I can try to be strong, to be able to take care of my love ones. At the same time, be intelligent, smart, hardworking and earn big bucks. I can also try to be remember to exercise more, be healthy and more responsible. The list goes on... But... There are also times where I just want to be a spoilt little brat. Slouching in front of the television and pretending the homework are done. Or leave my clothes all over the room. And in some of the days I could say "Fuck You" to the idiots in my life and not feel so bad. So its a little obvious, I'm am one imperfect little boy. So do forgive me, when I shut the door in your face because I must be feeling shitty. Aloha!
11.November.2003 12:12am can we stop just for a while? Everyone has regrets. everyone. Things you wished you have done or should not have done in your past, its a human thing you see, to always wish for something better, for now and the future, and also the past. Due to my huge diet of daily celluloid feeds, one of my biggest regrets was not falling madly in love when I was 16, to taste what it is like to be love-sick puppy. ;) I have always felt that at different stages of our life, we tend to experience the same things differently. Whether it is traveling to same place, going to a favorite band's concerts or just looking up at the sky. I think it has a little to do with the change in perspective at the different phases of our life. That is why I am so adamant on going on a world tour now when I'm young. To experience the world as a young adult, to compare notes later when I visits the places later again when I'm older. To just experience everything over and over again. Things changes, and sometimes it hurts to want to go back again so much. Is the hardest thing in life to just move on? I'm a little old for this but I've got to say growing up sucks sometimes. I guess I can be counted as one of the generation that saw the world make the transition into the spanking new age of mobile phones. Anyone remember the times, where people were on time more or less and there isn't much last minute cancellation of dates. Times past and things changes, though they don't necessary change for the better.
Sometimes it hurts just standing in the sun,
11.November.2003 12:12am yah and you too bitch! I've always had great imagination. When I was in my youth, hours would just fly by with me sitting there lost in some wild fantasies. As I grow up, I found myself picturing every scenes as they happen in the books I've read (so having LOTR come to life and so like what I've picture in my head was really great!) But having such an imagination doesn't always make for great afternoon distractions only. For the rare few times I've gone to the movies for a horror show, I would find myself haunted by vivid images from the show for weeks to come. Even now, occasionally I would still vaguely recall some b-grade hk show on some dead emperor that I watched as a kid. brrr. Everyone has people who pisses them off, I am no exception. Being straightforward and judgmental, I have a relatively low tolerance for self-pompous idiots and fools who speaks out loud and do little work actually. So my little black book is a little bit on the heavy side. But being somewhat insecure and nice (I hope), I tend to leave these people alone and go on with my life without nary a word (ok maybe once every now and then). This is totally in contrast to people like those taiwanese MPs who would throw a chair across the room at the smallest slight. But... I found a way to vent my irritation with these people. I would imagine myself in a conversation with them (utilizing of skills!! wooo) and a shouting match would ensue and of course with me as the eventual winner, walking away with a smirk leaving behind a speechless nemesis. lol
"What makes you qualified to do the job?" - Pee lol. excerpt from my encounters with villains in my life...:)
10.November.2003 5:52am honest... My girl was telling me yesterday that perhaps I should treat this site as more of a personal diary and be more open with what I'm thinking about instead of juz telling ppl what happens to me everyday. Yah I figure that out a while back, guess I'm juz too chicken to do an online expose. There's an expectation to perform well in public u see, and what if you don't like what you see? (not that many ppl come here tho:S) But frankly speaking, if it was me, unless someone is damn bloody hot or interesting, I guess I won't even bother tuning in to his/her life story. So yah gonna try to be more honest, not too brutal, like her, and not too whiny I hope (oh lord, why this & why that etc..) So let me start now: Exams sux (what's new) and I'm getting the jitters. Lol. Will do better next time.. When I started this blog I hoped/prayed that my old friends would use this site to communicate with me and each other and also write glowing/smart comments about me. This ain't happening tho. Through the sheer combination the non-existence of surfing habit to outright lack of time, there hasn't been much communication, let alone "glowing" comments about me. So you don't always get what you want, what's new. :(
09.November.2003 9:32pm flyby baby... 2 entries ago, I mentioned about an online game which I got addicted to, Gunbound, well... here's a bit more info for all you guys out there who are not having exams and have the time to partake in this addictive game. The game play is very simple, you control a mobile (vehicle) and square off against other players online. You take turns adjusting the strength and angle, lobbing/shooting projectiles at each other ala worms. That's not the coolest bit, each of us is given a online avatar which you can customize with costumes you buy with winnings from your game. These costumes ranges from space suit to pirate hats to cute little butterfly wings (so even the girls are not immune) and thus you find the players slogging into the night trying to earn enuff to buy that desirable gold mace that they want. Lol. Watched the final matrix installation last thursday and boy was it a good show. Hmm despite all the negative reviews I thought the show was thoroughly enjoyable, a fitting end to a wonderful story. I guess if u are going into the theatres hoping for another grand twist like the first show or some new special effects you would be disappointed. But what I find enjoyable about the show is how it developed over the 3 installation into this simple but grand story about hope and fighting against the odds. Sigh, such epics (Braveheart is another good example) to me are what a good show is all about where ultimately what matters is a storyline that touches you.
05.November.2003 9:51pm
Oh, why you look so sad? Exams are coming in less than 2 weeks. Sigh... more sleepless nights again. note to myself: stock up on lotsa n lotsa coffee. Times did an article about mental illness in asia recently and how we asians faces up to increasing numbers of mental patients. The report reveals that despite our hurtle towards modernity and sleek gadgets, we are still a bunch of ignorant? old-fashioned? people. Mental illness in our region are still treated with a stigma and we find thus we refuses to acknowledge its existence openly. Sigh. The article reports on the lack of adequate facilities and know-how to take care of mental patients, resulting in appalling living conditions. lol, in the rush forward we seems to have forgotten to take care of ourselves.. .. .. I am beginning to sense myself changing ... changing into another participant in the rat-race. *squeak*
03.November.2003 10:01pm boom !!! Updates! The photo gallery section is up so juz click on 1000 Words to visit. At the moment there is only one gallery there - photos from my trip to aussie this summer. It might take a while for the photos to load, so hang tight. Got introduced to this latest online game by a friend and I am now officially addicted. sux. Exams in 2 weeks time. SUX SUX. sigh. but the game is real fun though. Check it out at gunbound.
30.October.2003 10:35pm I want you to want me Recently there have been two deaths around me. One was the teacher of a good friend of mine and the other the brother of a classmate. When I heard the news from them, I was stunned for a while. Maybe it was the proximity of the deaths to me, the news rekindle this childhood fear of death inside me. Its like a little reminder that one day everyone of us would have to say good bye. And so for the whole weekend I had this urge to see my friends (whom I've neglected for a while), to find out what's happening in the life. Since their graduation working life has taken a fair chunk of their time and everyone seems to have drifted apart. Even for the guys who are still in Uni, we are bogged down by our school works. But then again busy is such an easy excuse right? Hmm realize (again) I hasn't been treating my parents well enough, though I really love them a lot. And the funny thing is, now staying in hall, I miss all their quirky/naggy/typical parenting ways. Like the nightly ultra-bitter! cooling tea. Or the sudden jolt in the night to wake me up to drink water (in case I dehydrate I suppose :P). Its clich¨¦, but we really don't treasure what we have now eh. that's life by the way. I want you to want me - Letter to Cleo -
29.October.2003 8:40pm Simply forever Finally got to watch the show 10 Things I hate about You yesterday. Wow, really enjoy the show a lot, been a while since I have seen anything such light-hearted yet smart in its own way. Hmm was growing up that fun? Made a conclusion about myself - I really digs teen movies (albeit good ones of course). The last two was 10 Things and Save the Last Dance, both equally good shows that traced the wild-eyed insecurities and uncertainties of teen hood, it wasn't easy growing up I guess but that was the fun bit right. Coincidently, both shows starred the very talented and very beautiful Julia Stiles. :) Got a voyeuristic fetish to satisfy? Check out Grouphug.us, a confession site for the little devil in us. I admit it kinda perverse in a way but the confessions do make good reads. doctor's advice: take in moderation. too much secrets ain't good for the heart. Reading through the entries, it seems the world is filled with lonely people just wanting to be hug. Is the world this cold? And we are reduced to little cavemen in our florescent caves scribbling electrons in internet. Its that little bit sad. Sometimes it hurts, just standing in the sun
29.October.2003 4:37pm fresh Woohoo, I'm back. Found some time to do up an archives page, so do drop by there. Nothing spectacular just a functional page for reminiscing. Life has been pretty busy so far, some bright and some not-so-bright moments but I am still alive and that is some bonus.:) Well, will drop by here again soon. hang tight.
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