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Back :: 27.January.2004 10:32am
. rock
fuck
I'm a little bucket of contradiction. Well, well, well, the current state of my mood is ping-ponging between outright joy and downright shitty. Lol, and I wonder why I'm not good with people. The reason for the former state of mind was because of a very very good movie that I caught yesterday - School of Rock. Its really been quite a while since I caught a show with such good music in it. And truth to be told, I really like Jack Black. He seems to embodies that secret little boy in all of us, the one that burst forth from our guts when the chance to lives it up when no one is watching comes along. I have always thought that if I knew how to play the guitar or the drums, I would be in a rock band, yes sir R-O-C-K!! And maybe if I'm real good, there will be concerts lined up back-to-back touring the whole world, kicking ass wherever I go and changing the world just that little bit. Well, and I could be making castles in the cloud too!! :| I think I said this before, but I think 50 years down the road, I'll still be saying the same old line - music heals the soul!! What was it that someone has said, that music is the language of the heart and everyone knows how to speak it well. Hmm, maybe its time for me to go catch a good rock concert...
So come on, girl Shit, along with the word fuck, is one of those brilliant inventions that changed the world when they came out. You see, I could be shitting (a verb!!) or I could just be shit (adjective!), it all depend on how you use it, eh. In our case today, its an adjective - my mood is shitty. simple. Calvin (& Hobbes) once said something like this "I know the world isn't fair but why hasn't it once been unfair to my benefits" or something like that. Sometimes, just sometimes, you get bog down, discourage, tired, just that little too much, and you feel like stopping right where you are. And let the world wash past...
Sometimes, just sometimes Nothing in life would ever be right, perfect is just an imaginary word, you see. So, I would like to ask you, yes YOU, just one simple question - "What is it worth to you?" But then again asking questions was what started all the shit (noun). Could it be that life is too short and just living it is hard enough and every other stuffs could be just distraction... Buffy (the truth is out! I am a fan and I am not ashamed!) once put it rather elegantly - "Life will always be full of pain and tears but without those how the hell would you know how true joy can be and that love could be so close to perfect" (or at least something similar, unless of course I'm delusional) And so
the story ends, But
there could be a sequel,
21.January.2004 1:36pm up yours! Dissatisfaction is the latest poison to hit Henry-ville. You see it's kinda hip to go around ranting about how everything sucks and that you are the only one who knows how to un-suck everything. I suspect it has a little to do with that little demon that hangs around the back of my head going by the name of ego. So you see, I think I am better than them so I don't really think what they are doing is the right thing. "No that picture needs a little more blue!". "What the hell!!! This is what you called training!" "@#%^$ you!" Hmm, doesn't make for great bed-times stories for my grandchildren eh. There is only one thing to do: Be nice and humble (okay so that's two, sue me) Going back home for the holidays. Happy Chinese New Year to everyone.
15.January.2004 9:30am Honesty is the best policy Woah!, My theatre production website is finally up (urm although some pages are still not updated :P) so do check it out at Getting Away With Murder. In case you are wondering that's the show's title. Heehe, quite excited about me being in it. Was working on a project for the show itself one day, and I came to realize something - honesty is so hard to do. Not the type of returning the wallet of some poor soul but more of like being honest with yourself. Like how crappy, you actually are or how you really just suck at it and so just shut up and get on with life. Think the human ego, especially for guys, is really one of the most contradictory thing we ever have. Sometimes all it take to get thing going in the right direction is to admit that you are just wrong or not good enough and let someone else take over. But then again in the modern world, you'd be soon label as a wuss or a push-over and life just rapidly deteriorate after that. So, the big question is, where's the hell the bloody middle line? P.S. Dannybunny has now officially closed down his site. A minute of silence for the loss of a really entertaining blog...
09.January.2004 11:09am listening: Sister Hazel "Life got in the way" Hmm, realized that I tend to start writing again whenever I've just gone through something bad or depressing. Its like that old clich¨¦ that most artists or writers (the good one anyways :P) are such tortured souls, so hmm ... am I considered an artist now? Its a wonder that things could change so much and change so little at the same time. Perhaps its the stress, the mountain of work or even the singing of Chrissie Hynde, but life's just getting a bit unbearable. I have concluded a long time ago that this is a cyclic thing. Well, life is just full of ups and downs, you see, and when its down your thoughts tend to be edging toward suicidal. Depression can such a scary thing, don't you think? I wondered... as we grow older do our wants really changes? From wanting never to be label the class butt-kicking target when you were in junior school to being with in-crowd, seems like we try to find ourselves at every stage of our life. Have a few good friends whom I though have matured or reached the point of being "in-touch" with their inner self but over the years I have seen quite a few of them break down and suddenly all theories are thrown out of the windows huh. Maybe life is just that, ups and downs (so the rumors are true!! :P) and every moment of our life we try to define ourselves. "... So you don't stand out and you
don't fit in. Weird. I used to run very well. (sigh used to...) During one earlier phase of my life I came to the conclusion that I could run so well because that's how I deal with life too, running away from problems too big for me to overcome. I like to do things like that, reading too deeply into everyone's little action and coming up with some grandiose theory about his psychological make-up. It's a little quirk but it defines me and so because of it I am who I am... Had a thought, maybe we are all just like those little fluorescent fishes in the deepest part of the oceans swimming around blindly, our bodies a magical display of dancing lights that seems so out of place there. But because we are all blind we can never really see how beautiful the lights are and we go on searching ... ˇˇ :: Back :: |
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