Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 12:38 AM GMT

To quoteth Dylan ...
The answer my friend is blowing in the wind, the answer is blowing in the wind.

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 12:57 AM GMT

Nicely done, boz. I was just listening to 'fourth time around'.

Thanks. :-)

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 1:05 AM GMT

You've taken away the one thing I can do! Swearing and wisecracking, without that I am nothing. Sob.

Not that I could even manage that tonight when our paths accidentally crossed. Utterly monged and too wound up to sleep. Aaarrgh.

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 1:10 AM GMT

You were fine! (and I didn't mean you, it was really referring to friends in common with the ex, in big group situations)

I was shattered from shopping in high heels - I've never spent the best part of a day drunk in a knicker department before.

(Sorry about the blogging, by the way!)

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 4:45 AM GMT

1. Quit throwing it at people with hard heads.
2. Becuase you can't stop thinking or feeling, crying shows that you're still alive and able to feel. It's not bad to cry, it's just bad not to stop.
3. The home is not just a place, even when I broke up with my LTR, leaving the @#%$! apartment we called home for 6 years still hurt. It stops being a place and becomes a part of your life.
4. This, I have no problem with. I tolerate theirs as they tolerate mine, but we never just sit around cracking jokes. We talk about our lives.
5. Because she doesn't think she did anything wrong.
6. It's a passageway into the soul, some songs are keys, some songs are doors and some songs are both. I love music and it always brings out an emotion in me.
7. You don't want to feel so much, you're in pain or you think that this will help you through. Sometimes it can, I stop myself from feeling and go cold when bad things happen, but I mourn later.

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 12:09 PM GMT

5. Because she doesn't think she did anything wrong.

Good point, there, Paul. I'm sure you're right.

7. You don't want to feel so much, you're in pain or you think that this will help you through. Sometimes it can, I stop myself from feeling and go cold when bad things happen, but I mourn later.

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean, and I do this sometimes, too. Used to always get called a cold b|tch for it!

Thanks for the supportive comments, too.

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 2:43 PM GMT

What's that song - "And I'll cry if I want to". Anyway, any professional will tell you that repression isn't healthy and it just leads to more mess later on.

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 4:04 PM GMT

Except 'professional' is a much debased term these days. It's meant to mean a member of the army, the church, or a practiser of law. It came to mean any job that required university study to qualify, and was paid by results, not by hours invested. Then the classless society intervened, and now a professional can be anyone in fulltime consistent employment.
A windowcleaner would say that repression isn't healthy too. Dignity has its merits though.

Sunday, 16 November 2003 - 11:05 PM GMT

Dignity is vastly overrated.

Monday, 17 November 2003 - 12:13 AM GMT

Isn't it *just*. :D

Monday, 17 November 2003 - 10:00 AM GMT

Well, five hours? So you can go. like, 4 and a half hours without crying? Pretty good in my book...

Home isn't a place, it's all the memories, smells, feelings associated with the place. I moved out. Did me the power of good. And now I feel like my new house is my home.

Music's a @#%$! when you've just broken up with someone - every single soddin song seems to be about breaking up. Lost love. The first day I listened to the radio after breakin up with Holly, bloody Terry Wogan was playin "I can't make you love me"(Bonnie Raitt), "I see your love everywhere" (Beth Nielsen Chapman) and some Rod Stewart weepie number. Grrr...

Time, honey. And you need something new. New surroundings. Sell the flat - prices are goin back down. Best time to sell is now, then buy a cheaper place in a few months when people have stopped askin ridiculous amounts of money for flea-pits!

Hugs xxxxxxxxxx

Monday, 17 November 2003 - 11:37 AM GMT

Cheers. I think you're so right. Start again.