The History of Car Insurance
Ever since I traveled back in time and started one of the world’s largest auto insurance companies many people have asked me what it was like in the past. In fact I got asked so much I decided that I would write an account of my time travel. So here’s what I’ve got to say.
You see, one day, when I was in northern Alaska on a business trip, I was admiring my shiny new toaster. All of a sudden two slices of toast pop out. This of course startles me because I didn’t recall putting bread in the toaster. It startled me so much that I stumbled back a couple of steps and stepped on a gecko. This frightened me because I didn’t think there were any geckos in northern Alaska. I remember how frightened I was.
Then I remembered I had a time machine. I soon decided to go back and time and make sure I didn’t cook toast, step on a gecko, or other bad things. The only problem was I set the time machine to go back five minutes instead of ten minutes. When I got there the toast had already toasted, my time machine wasn’t there, and the gecko was running away so quickly I think he knew I was going to step on him. I soon came to the realization that I only got my time machine after I had stepped on the gecko. So after chasing him around for about five minutes I finally stepped on him and started heading back towards my time machine. When I got there I set it for ten minutes ago. Upon arriving there I immediately threw the toaster over the cliff and stepped on the gecko. Now that I had my time machine and my toaster hadn’t made toast I could go back in time and figure out how the dinosaurs, which was my original assignment.
I gathered my supplies and set the time machine to the Jurassic Period. Upon reaching my destination, I looked up just in time to see a Tyrannosaurus Rex eat a gecko. I thought that was weird, but don’t worry it has something to do with my story. Well it turns out the toaster, which I threw off the cliff, was not completely broken and was still half way making toast. My point is that the past had been mixed with the future. When I thought that things couldn’t have been any worse, the same T-Rex that ate the gecko ate me too.
Before I go on I’ll warn all you readers by telling you that if you don’t like roller coasters then don’t go through the digestive system of a large hungry beast. After my wild ride I found myself in the stomach of the dinosaur along with the gecko. After about twenty minutes inside the stomach I started talking to the gecko, and to my surprise, he talked back. After some small talk we got into a conversation about all the different things we could do with the time machine. We decided that we would go to the early nineteen hundreds and invent automobile insurance. He wanted to call the company Gecko because he was a gecko and I wanted to call it Guy because that’s what I am. After a heated debate we decided to mix the two and call the company Gieco. All our dreams depended on if the beast ate the toaster too. This was a big if considering I had thrown the toaster off a cliff into tundra that seemed to expand for miles and miles. I guess it was my turn for a little bit of good luck because the gecko and I were soon joined by my now not so shiny toaster. We were now on our way to the early nineteen hundreds.
The nineteen hundreds were really weird because all the cars were black and identical and everything was so cheap. To illustrate my point, I bought 20 plots of land with a fraction of my Christmas money. These twenty plots of land were the first Gieco offices. As the business grew I became more and more curious about Gieco’s status in the future. So when I had a break I took a quick stroll to the early years of the second millennium. I found good news because Gieco was still the best and there didn’t even seem to be any real competition. I did happen to see an unusual sight though. There was a guy with a toaster talking to a duck that kept saying, “Aflak!”
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