-I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
~~~Rita Rudner
-(Online)
Brian: But I am making an effort to suck les
Brian: ...wherever he is.
-If a person offends you, do not resort to extremes, simply watch for your chance and hit him with a brick.
~~~Mark Twain
-Yes, my sexy beast, shall we commit some genetic tomfoolery as I thrust my slobster into you???
~~~Fred
-Molly: Not like I jump every guy that hits on me at the bowling alley.
Molly: Just the cute little high schoolers that would be perfect cock sucking height if I had a penis.
-(While playing CoH)
Taylor: eee
Taylor: That's the sound a level 36 makes when struck by a level 50 mob.
-(Online)Taylor: Don't worry aboiut it.
Taylor: Or that i.
-Brian: Whoa. So on the website there's an advertisement for a show called "Friday Night Lights"
Brian: For some reason I read it as "Friday Night Jesus"
-Greg: I want free DP
-Taylor: ahg, I broke a dragon!
-Avril Lavigne is not fuckin' punk rock.
~~~Mike Ness, Social Distortion
-(Online)
Brian: Oh man, I can't wait for [my copy of the Whose Line DVD] to get here.
Brian: ...well... [get to my] home... I think my ravenous family will violently tear it open and drink it.
Brian: ...watch it
Brian: What the fuck?
-(Online)Brian: Probably not. Erica's rather deaf.
Brian: I almost typed death, instead of deaf.
Brian: Didn't want to state the obvious, though.
Brian: Since Erica is a walking pile o' death.
-I'm kupo for kupo nuts!
~~~Moguta, FFIX
-Molly: Blow and Greg do NOT belong in the same subject paragraph.
-Alex: NINJAS ARE INFESTING YOUR VAGINA!
-Greg: I've never once had writers block while writing lesbian porn.
-(Online, to me)
Brian: But you'll figure it out. It'll hit you like a truck hits a bug on the freeway, knocking you off your chair
and splattering you against the wall.
-(Online)
Greg: Naming stadiums after companies seems stupid to me.
Greg: Sort of like people who buy shirts that say things like "Nike" or "Aeropostale".
Greg: It just seems odd to me that people pay to advertise for other people.
Greg: I mean, I can understand wearing a shirt saying something like "Greg, Single, Free, Big".
-(Online)
Brian: Hah, I like the poll.
Brian: Which is why I chose that particular career path instead of something a little less provocative.
-Well I only have two holes left.
~~~Sister Marcia, on places for microphone cords
-All my bandwidth is downloading porn.
~~~Alex
-Spit-spot, fuckhead.
~~~Joan
-I don't think the length of my vagina is gonna affect my shirt size.
~~~Molly
-Oh yeah, I love the cock.
~~~Greg
-1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12, and they all went down to the Prostitute Picnic.
~~~Mary Kay
-I like it up the shithole.
~~~Corey
-I basically had everything but sex with...haha I said buttsex.
~~~Meredith
-God, I hate you, God!
~~~Mary Kay
-I don't like that hole. It reminds me of that one movie.
~~~Brian
-Britt is cunnilly-endowed. Wait, that's not the part of the word I wanted.
~~~Meredith
-Son of a fuck!
~~~Mary Kay
-If he doesn't have a girlfriend, they might think he's gay, or a serial killer.
~~~DeWayne
-[Corey] tried to get me to come but I didn't.
~~~Meredith