I once knew a minister who retired in the 1960’s, but who then served as the pastor of a Disciples church for 20-some years. By the time I knew him, a few years following his second retirement, he was pretty long in the tooth.
The old man soon became severely debilitated, and on the days when I went and sat with him in his bedroom as he wavered between awareness and something else, he sometimes suddenly looked at me and asked, “What is grace?”
It was a haunting question, I thought, because I never once assumed he wanted my definition. Rather, it seemed to me he was trying to sort it out for himself after more than 90 years of life, mostly spent mediating grace to others. I don’t know whether he ever found peace about that. But, up to the end of his life it was on his mind, even when it was difficult to decipher his other thoughts.
We easily get caught up in acting as if God’s love for us were dependent upon our doing something to earn it, measuring up to a standard of acceptability. We can forget that right now. We never will succeed.
I think what God wants most from us is a relationship. The grace comes in God’s willingness to embrace us as we turn to God, admitting our weakness, confessing our dependence on God for all things, and trying to understand how our lives might reflect God’s love as we relate to others.
God’s grace is an on-going reality and blessing, leaving us room even to make mistakes and fail as we try faithfully to grow spiritually, opening our hearts to God’s presence in our lives.
It’s something that blossoms through our entire lives.