Mountain bikers were banned from South Mountain because a few isolated genuine concerns were magnified way out of proportion by professional agitators who had no concern for the real issues, only their desire to ban bikes. Nevertheless, the misrepresentation of mountain bikers and mountain biking helped get riders banned in Essex.
In Union County, that same misrepresentation was at work, only at a much more below-the-radar level; the ultimate decision was made at a closed door meeting and people were not informed until afterwards. However, the Union County government was basing its actions on the misrepresentations of mountain bikers everywhere, including at Essex County. When asked to produce the documents they relied on to determine mountain biking should be banned at Watchung in an open public records act request, Union County provided the questionable trail survey done at South Mountain, not Watchung, and three random news articles about biking “conflicts” in trails other than Watchung – one in Connecticut.
Reviewing how both bans came to be, one feeding off the misrepresentations of the other, one is struck by the similarities to Daniel Greenfield’s satirical column in which he provides – in jest – a blueprint for how to report on the middle east with consistent bias. So let’s examine (with apologies to Mr. Greenfield),
How to write about mountain biking:
Writing about mountain biking is a booming field. Cycling is an increasingly popular sport, and gets a boost in popularity both from modern environmental and health-centered trends. Mountain biking is no exception.Writing about mountain biking is not hard. Anyone who has consumed a steady diet of average media fare already knows most of the main points. The trick is to regurgitate and present them in the right order for the day’s latest outrage.Mountain bikers get hot, even in winter, being engaged as they are in physical activity, and wearing packs and helmets and other vaguely paramilitary-looking gear that many find unsettling, so it is easy to suggest that there is conflict – even violence – simmering just under the surface. The trails and woods in which they ride should be described as “troubled land”. Throw in ironic references and metaphors comparing conflict between mountain bikers and others as a tense standoff, and insisting that peace is very far away.
There are two types of people involved in the issue of mountain biking; the mountain bikers with their multi-thousand-dollar machines and their moisture-wicking shirts and helmets and the latest in electronic and technological gear, and everyone else, mainly, hikers and equestrians. The mountain bikers are fanatical; the hikers and equestrians are passionate. The mountain bikers are destructive and hate-filled; the hikers and equestrians are simply embittered. The mountain bikers want everything; the hikers and equestrians feel they will be left with nothing. Never bother to mention that many of the hikers have just as many technical do-dads as the mountain bikers; indeed, make sure not to write about any of the BMW’s and Mercedeses you see in the lot by the local hiking trail head.
If you happen to notice that, as happened in Essex County, some of the hikers went out of their way to sabotage the trail with tacks or glass, or blatently lied about and misrepresented the conduct of the bikers, don’t mention it.
Don’t ask the hiker (or equestrian) how many mountain bikers he caused to crash with sabotage or slandered, or how much he makes a month. Likewise, with equestrians, you may notice that their horses eat better than some mountain bikers. Do not comment on this. Instead, ask both the hikers and equestrians about their hopes for peace on the trail. Nod knowingly when they say it’s up to the bikers.
Weigh every story one way; depersonalize the bikers, personalize the hikers and equestrians. One is a statistic, the other a precious individual. A ban on bikes, or even deliberate trail sabotage against bikers, is always justified retaliation for something, but the mountain bikers who try to ride trails after they’ve been closed are perpetuating a “cycle of violence”. Center everything around negotiations. If mountain bikers do things besides shred and tear up trails, such as maintaining them, or volunteering, don’t dwell on it. Frame everything in terms of how the mountain bikers will compromise, and what they are willing to give up for peace.
Mountain bikers can be divided into two categories; there are the good bikers, who wear glasses, live in young trendy neighborhoods, and use i-pads. They typically have a trendy hybrid car with a rack on top and drive to the trailhead, where they mount up their logo-covered brand-new bike that still has the price-tag on it. They drink overpriced Starbucks lattes and fancy energy drinks. They do often donate to or volunteer for some environmental cause, but don’t mention that. However, mention that they are the only hope of an otherwise brutish group that is too busy having an adrenaline rush to hear the tortured screams of mother earth. Then there are the bad mountain bikers. These are the tanned, often somewhat older riders. They may or may not wear glasses, but most of their gear is not new; it gets too much use. Many of them will ride to the trail head -- if their local trails remain open. Often they work on or rebuild their own bikes, many of which have no logos, or are covered in stickers, but they probably don’t know how to use i-pads. They drink plain old black coffee, or water or Gatorade. A good IPA is considered a well-earned post-ride refreshment. They are interested in riding, not environmental activism and Gaea theory. If asked, they’d tell you they are an environmentalist in the same way that Teddy Roosevelt was. In fact, they may even use the sexist, old-fashioned term outdoorsman! If you have to write about them, make sure you present them as out-of-touch with the earth, and totally lacking in a social conscience.
Mountain bikers generally should be depicted as looming menacingly over children and little old ladies. They are also best shown as zooming past. If you can get a photo of someone on a downhill, the blurrier, the better. Make it seem as if the speeds reached on long straight downhills are typical of tight winding turns and narrow climbs.
When reporting on any actual trail conflict, try your best to make sure the hiker who claims she was run off the trail by the speeding biker is a pregnant woman. Failing that, two elderly people are best. If you can’t find any cases of actual trail conflict, make them up. Are there no incidents of bikers endangering people? Then quote hikers who say the cyclists give them dirty looks, or were “rude”. Rudeness is extremely useful; it makes one an instant victim yet it actually means nothing, anyone can be perceived as rude according to some standard.
Do not ever mention any connection some of the hiker-equestrian agitators or parks officials might have with anti-bike groups or agendas. If a groups, like the Sierra Club, is well-thought of, keep it that way; do not mention that they have a policy of advocating the exclusion of bicycles from offroad trails. This allows them, when quoted, to seem like a neutral party. Meanwhile, convey to your readers that there is something alarming about how mountain bikers cling stubbornly to their trails, while making it clear that they will have to be ethnically cleansed from the parks for there to be peace. But do not use the word ethnically cleansed, or others like it, such as apartheid, which suggest, quite rightly, that you would be unfairly targeting or singling out one group of trail users. Instead, say they will be banned for the protection of other trail users – and the betterment of the environment.
Write about the hills and the blood-red sunsets over the trees, mention all the soldiers from the American Revolution that probably passed over them in a history you never bothered to learn. Talk about your mixed feelings as a former mountain biker, or someone who has bicycling friends, at the sight of mountain bikers oppressing another people. Describe the deep soulful eyes of a hiking or equestrian or government parks department leader or agitator.
Write about tire tracks. Specifically, compare tracks to ruts, even if this isn’t really honest, and then compare ruts to scars on mother earth. Write about how all the bicycle tire tracks you see on the trail make you uncomfortable, but never dare mention a footprint, let alone a steaming pile of horse poop. Close with an old man who expresses hope that one day peace will come to this troubled land. Then go home.
Sound a lot like most media coverage of mountain biking controversies? Surprise!
…In short, it is as easy to denounce mountain biking as it is to report on the middle east in ways that bias the issue. You just have to tilt your viewpoint slightly off center, in everything.
If this seems like satire, it is, but then again, it also isn’t. The sad truth, is it might very well have been the blueprints used to denounce and forbid mountain biking at two of New Jersey’s best local parks.
And that says a lot.
Updated: Friday, 22 August 2014 11:43 PM EDT
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