What Buffy Told Giles
By Sha

Title:What Buffy Told Giles
Author: Sha
Disclaimer:I sadly own naught. Joss and Co. does.
Spoilers:Beauty and the Beasts.
Rating:umm PG (?)
Notes: IMPORTANT!! This is a chalange from caps site on what if Buffy tells Giles the truth about Angel in the library.So..... this picks up AFTER the gang thinks Oz wolf may have killed someone and AFTER Buffy finds Angel,wild in the woods.And yes I know I butchered the episode but it goes back to it's original shape.Thanks to Andra.And to Darcy, who will always be Queen of B/G.

Thoughts denoted by: <>

Thanks for the help I recieved with the transcript to this epi.

<Buffy? I wonder what she's doing here? And with the card catalog at that! Oh my beautiful Buffy,even in sleep you light up the room. What I wouldn't give fo-
Ahh forget it old man. She is so fresh and young and always seems to belong to another.
Just be thankful you get to share as much of her life as you do.>

Giles heartfelt sigh awakened Buffy from her sleep.
Rubbing tired eyes she smiled up at Giles." Hey." "Hmm. Hello."Giles mumbled,distracted while reading the title to the book Buffy had in her lap.
Buffy quickly realized what it must look like, her surrounded by all the books, and tried to play it off.
"Oh. Boy. Faith and her nutty books."
"'Exploring Demon Dimensions' and 'Mystery of Acathla'.Are you quite sure these are hers Buffy?"

"Yeah! And to think she still listens to heavy metal. Freaky deaky." Buffy got up and started to walk down the stairs in the library. <Darnit Giles, why can't you just be blind for once? But then you wouldn't be my Giles would you?>

"Buffy..." <What are you trying to hide my dear?>
She realized that he didn't buy it and leaned against the railing.
"What if... I told you that... I had a dream about Angel... and, um... it brought up some questions?" <Oh please don't give me that hurt look.I can hardly bare it! I need help and only you can give it to me!I know it's not fair after everything.....>

<Darn! Will I never hear the end of that pillock?> "I'd say it was to be expected. Must have been some dream. I didn't think you knew what a card index was for."
"I dreamt that he came back."

She sat down on the steps waiting, dreading to hear Giles response. Giles sat beside her. "Of course. After Jenny was killed, I had dreams that she was s-still alive, that I saved her." <Yes my dear,I saw that flinch. Well cruel it may be but the reminder is automatic I'm afraid.>

"This was vivid. Really vivid. Three-dimensional,surround sound, the hills are alive..."

"Do you believe it was a prophecy?
"No. I-I don't know. I... I guess it just... it made me wonder." <Can I... dare I tell you...what would you do Watcher mine?>
Giles looked away in thought.
"Is there a chance even? Could it happen?"
"Well, there's no record of anyone returning from a demon dimension once the... gate was closed. I-I-I can't imagine how it could happen or-or why." <But with my bloody luck? He'll be back tomorrow.>

"Let's just pretend for a second that... Angel somehow found his way back to Sunnydale. What would he be like?"

"I really can't say. From what is known about that dimension, i- it would suggest a world of... brutal torment. And time moves quite differently there, so..."
"I remember. So he would've been down there for hundreds of years." <Oh god this sucks. I should just tell him.It's the least I owe him.>
"Yes."
"Of torture." <Oh Angel, I am *so* ,so sorry.>
"It would take someone of extraordinary... will and character to survive that and, uh, retain any semblance of self." Giles stated,swallowing hard." Most likely, he'd be, be a monster." <You remember what that was like hmm?> "A lost cause." <No please, Angel doesn't deserve this too.>
"Maybe. Maybe not. In my experience, there are... two types of monster. The first, uh, can be redeemed, or more importantly, wants to be redeemed."
"And the second type?" She whispered,her voice cracking slightly.
"The second is void of humanity, cannot respond to reason... or love." <She's about to..damnit Willow just a few more minutes and Buffy would open up to me! Of all the bloody luck. Please Buffy tell me what's bothering you.What ever it is you can trust me with it my love.>

Willow had, unexpectedly, come in bringing a box of donuts with her.
"Hey guys,I thought Faith was on duty."
<Yes! A small break from those soulful eyes.> "Oh, hey. Change of plans."
"Glazed or cake? It's fun to watch them make them. They use this spritzy thing, and they drop the batter into this..."
"Couldn't sleep, huh?"
Willow sighed,giving Buffy a small smile," I've been at Mister Donut since the TV did that snowy thing."
"How come *you're* the Wakey Girl? I mean, this time, it's not your boyfriend who's the cold-blooded..."
She noticed Buffy looking behind her with wide eyes. Oz was standing there,putting on his shirt.
"Hey Oz, Jelly doughnut?"
Shaking his head 'no' Oz got straight to the point." Everything all right?"
<Damn, I almost forgot! Please oh please don't let it have been Angel!> "Yeah. Uh, what happened with the inspection of the body?"
Willow avoided the issue with a smile and wave of a donut. "Anyone? They're yummy delicious!" "Willow, come on. Was it werewolf?"
Willow set the box down on the table. Her expression showed that she's not overly anxious to say.

"Was it a vampire?"
"I-it wasn't conclusive."
" How could it not be conclusive? What did it look like? Was he bit?"
"Buffy, let it go for now." <So unlike you Buffy, come on tell me damnit! What is going on in that head of yours?> Realizing the sensitivity of the issue with Oz standing right there, Buffy let it drop. "I'm sorry." Buffy made her way to the door in a attempt to leave and avoid Giles probing eyes.
She got three steps before he stopped her.

"Buffy wait! Willow, OZ, you may go now.I-I would like to talk to Buffy in private."

The two said their goodbye's and left the library, leaving Buffy and Giles alone.

"Buffy,I needant tell you that as your watcher that yo-you h-have cer-"
"Giles, stop, I know.What I'm about to tell you is very hard so I'm just going to tell you and that's that." <Whew! This is so hard.Couldn't I just run naked through the school screaming I love Snyder?> "Um Giles...... AngelisbackfromhellIfoundhiminthewoodslastnightwhenIknockedhimoutandtiedhimupinthemansion."
<What the hell did she just say?!Angel is what?> Umm Buffy speak a little slower because I could swear you just said that Angel is back." <And that bloody well better not be what I heard.>

"You heard me right. Angel is back.I found him in the woods last night.He was-was like a animal and I knocked him out and tied him up in chains in the mansion.And I'm s-so sorry that I can't do anything right. I couldn't kill Angelus when you needed me too and then I had to kill Angel and now..now this."Buffy threw herself into Giles arms sobbing.

"Hush Buffy no more tears..not now dear.We'll figure this out but I don't think I need to tell you about your dutys as far as you and Angel are concerned.I know you still love him but..."

"Giles! You think that's what this is about? I stopped loving Angel after all that happened. I know that I can't be with him.I don't *want* to be with him.Yes, it's true that the hardest thing I ever had to do was send him to hell.Not because of what you think though.It's the guilt that's eating me up Giles.The guilt that I caused ALL of this pain everyone is feeling.You,Angel,hell even Xander to a point. Giles,hurting you, knowing I hurt you has been killing me.If I could change everything I would.But I can't and now this. Just when everthing was better and we were healing..this happens.And I feel bad about feeling that way because after what I took from Angel what right do I have to wish he wasn't back.That he wasn't out of that mind altering torture? Oh Giles if you only knew how I felt about you.." Buffy wiped her eyes and pushing away from Giles she rushed on,"I gotta go.I can't.... I just gotta go for now."

Before Giles could stop her she ran from the room.

<Well bloody hell...she has feelings for me.Maybe,if I'm judging the look in her eyes right, loves me. Congrats old man.The one wish you've always wanted and you act like a jack ass and run her off before you can tell her the truth.>

***************************************************************************************

Buffy walked to the mansion, she had to see Angel.Had to believe that maybe he would be all right. Going through the heavy curtain she saw him, crouched against the wall,whimpering.

Slowly she walked towards him. Angel remained hunched over in his crouch, not looking up or giving any indication that she was there.
"Angel? Angel do you understand me?"
Still nothing from him. She came even closer. The tattoo on his back beckoning to her. Slowly she reached out and touched him lightly on the shoulder. He suddenly and very violently lashed out at her and roared.

"Good lord Buffy! What are you trying to do?" Giles outraged roar was a pretty good imitation of Angels animal one.
Buffy flinched and spun around to see Giles standing just a few feet away from her and the vampire. <Oh god,why did he come here? Please I just need to be alone. I can't face anyone right now.>
"Giles please I know that this looks bad but....."
Angels whimpering stopped them both. Looking over at him they could see that he was upset at Buffy's tears. Buffy ,again, tried to approach him.Softly crooning his name.
Once more he lashed out at her.
"Buffy, come here.He is responding to pure emotions.Be it his or yours but it is all pure emotions. Come on.We need to talk. Don't fear though, I believe,given time,he'll come around and be himself again."

With one backward glance, the two walked out of the mansion together.
Once outside, Giles gave her a big hug and then set her away from him. "Buffy, first let me say that it isn't Angel who did the killing. The school councelor was found dead just a few minutes ago.He was killed the same as the others.Secondly, I understand and will help you get Angel back on his feet. All this guilt between us must stop Buffy. What's done is done. Together, we must move on.THe past can't be changed and we can't take responsibility for others actions. You weren't the soul person involved in this."
Giles tenderly wiped away Buffy's tears smiling at her, with a small sad smile.
"Buffy, we all made mistakes. ALL. Even Jenny.But none of this pain and guilt is going to bring her back or make Angel whole again. So, we are going to leave it behind and worry about the now. We, me and you, are going to help Angel and each other."

"Giles, have I ever told you how much I love you? And not fatherly before you say anything I'll regret. I, Buffy Anne Summers, love you,Rupert Watcher Giles, with all my heart and soul. Now lets go find us a killer."

Saying that Buffy smiled to herself and walked towards Giles car.<Chew on that a while my stuttering,sexy,hunk-o-man.>
She was unprepared to have a strong arm wrap around her waist and pull her around.So she gasped to find herself face to face,only an inch apart, with Giles.And the *very* intense look in his gorgeous green eyes.

<Thought you were the only one would could cause such a surprise didn't you dear?>
"Buffy? I love you too.Very, very much." Then Giles did what he had wanted to do for so long....
He kissed his Slayer senseless.

END