Now In Theaters

Movie Title	Review	Grade
15 Minutes	Robert DeNiro! Violence! Police! Action! OK!	B-
See Spot Run	I don't know why I saw this in the first place, but I was suprised: this movie is actually pretty funny. There is some funny stuff in here, not the usual dumb kid movie.	B
The Mexican	Why did Tony Saprano (James Galdolfini) have to be gay? Don't ask me why, but that ruined everything (but there was not much to ruin). It was long and stupid, don't go see this!	D-
Down to Earth	Chris Rock is hilarious comedian, but how does he do on the big screen? Really good. If you like, what I call, Klassic Kris Komedy, you'll love this movie. It uses a lot of the same stand up as his acts, but the other stuff is really good. Its an A+ if you haven't seen the KKK before, but if you have, its a B+ (I have).	B+
Hannibal	I didn't see it, but I heard that it sucks or is too intelectual. My friend didn't like it.	B
Oh Brother, Where Art Though	Oh Brother, Where Art Though kicks ass on 10 levels. George Clooney shines, not as a dead fisherman, but as an escaped convict with a great supporting cast. Joel & Ethan Coen have done it again with this funny, yet cool movie. Just go see the fucking movie, and watch for the great sex scene with the Sirens!	A++
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon	No, that's not what you got in your fortune cookie, it's Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. Starring Chow-yung Fat and Michelle Yo, like it matters, is a whimsicle tale of flying and hitting shit. Sort of like a Chinese version of Peter Pan, where you can't tell Michael from Wendy. The fights scenes are great, ranging from swords to chop sticks, all quick and confusing. Other than the fight scenes, this movie fails on 9 levels. Bettween desert flash backs and stolen swords, this leaves a bad taste in my mouth, yearning for a sionide pill. Don't ask me why I gave it a grade, just go pay the $7.50 to see it you cheap fuck!	A-
Cast Away	Imagine Survivor not sucking without the Gilligan Aspect. And you got yourself Cast Away pie, fresh from Robert Zemekis' and Tom Hanks toasty cheecks. The movie is exciting, entertaining, and most of all, NOT GAY. Go see it, Tom Hanks is amazing not being a fag.	A
Unbreakable	I must say this right now; THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST FILMS EVER! Don't go if you are one of those ADHD type of people who have to see bright colors and excitement every 10 seconds. But still, very good and an amazing follow up to the 6th Sense. Oh yea, here is a clue; Look for a black cat.	A+
How the Grinh Stole Christmas	I had to sit through this piece of crap. At least they didn't make me see rugrats. But, anyhow, Jim Carrey did a really good job on the grinch part, a little over acting, but still nice. The whole movie is VERY boring. I suggest you either make this a movie to see on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day, or wait until it comes out on video.	C-
The 6th Day	It's Officail: Arnold is now a wuss. He opted NOT to go ahead and kill a few bad guys to lower the violence factor, he instead ruined the movie a lot. What ever happened to the Arnold of the 80's in Predator and Commando when he would mow down 70 guys with a 30 round clip and then axe off thier arms with a saw blade? Those days were the best. Just cuz 50 puny senators say violence is bad don't mean shit. Arnold rocks, but he is showing age. He is still good, but not like the Arnold of the 80's. Still, entertaining.	B
Charlies Angels	With all of the political correctness going around, this movie hit the right mixture of that with only 1 person that was non-white main charactor. Besides that, the action was okay (hard to believe Drew Berrymore could beat up 4 guys, but who cares, it was cool) and the humor was almost non-existant. Good for the Teenie-Boppers. Very Entertaining, but don't go see it if your a serious movie goer.	B
Nurse Betty	Hey, it was good. I liked Betty's husband the best, but other than that the rest of the cast was okay. Most played supporting roles to Betty, who wasn't funny. In the catagory of a comedy, this movie fails and as a drama it fails, but as a Dramady it is a success. Mixes the two worlds together to get a good movie. Chris Rock's Comic relief isn't all that special. Don't go to the movie expecting a funny Chris Rock supporting role as in Lethal Weapon. Rock has SOME funny scenes, but not too many.	B+
Hollow Man	Nice plot, cool effects, scarey, and Kevin Bacon's cock. I really don't want to see that. Nor will you. It ruins the whole movie, when you see it four times. Wait until this arrives on video to fast foward the dick parts. Still, this movie has the scariest scene ever, when you know he's naked, but you don't want to see his cock but do. Magic Numbers: 4 and 2, Cock 4 times, Ass twice.	F-
The Cell	Jennifor Lopez can't act. Would have been cool with another actress in there. Still good, but not scarey.	C
The Replacements	Sure you say, looks like another gay comedy with tons of fart jokes. But its not, its actually funny. Go see it. May not be as funny as the early summer comedies like Me Myself And Irene and Scarey Movie, but still fun to watch.	B
The Nutty Professor 2: The Klumps	I know this is kinda old, but I had to review it. THIS IS THE WORST MOVIE I HAVE EVER SEEN besides celebrity. Tries to repeat it self too often, nothing new, gets boring in the end, fails as a follow up to original. The first Nutty Professor was a hilarious movie that was new and had tons of scenes that made you feel like your stomach would fall out. But this, this is worse than Hollow Man, so bad, I can't write about it anymore. If this is still in theaters, DO NOT SEE IT! Don't worry though, Eddie Murphy will make his 4th movie spoof with the Incredible Shrinking Man next year that is surely going to suck if they put him in charge.	DOG SHIT AWARD. BELOW F-

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Video

Magnolia	Absolutely the best movie you will ever see. First after watching it you'll say "What the hell did I just see". Pull out a Bible and look around a bit then you'll understand. Should have won an Oscar, best movie you'll see.	A+
Any Given Sunday	Now, this was a pretty cool movie. Even though you see Laurance Taylors cock in this movie, it still was good enough to get it a better grade. At times it was long and boring, and by the end you want to leave. Rent it, it's pretty good.	B+
T2: Judgement Day Ultimate Edition	One of my all time favorite movies gets another showing on DVD. So, I am going to grade this on the features and other stuff. If I was grading the movie, it'd be and easy A+. The special features lead from Deleted scenes, The Making of, Making of T2:3D, Biographies, Special Edition Movie, Director Commentary, and a whole bunch more of meaningless stuff like subtitles. 23 minutes in deleted scenes. You can watch them inseted into the movie, or in a special featurette that has James Cameron tell you why he cut what he cut. Also included are the making of's, which each are a half hour. All in all, this is one of the best DVD's out there, and I recommend you buy it. Hey, who wouldn't want to see the deleted scene were they go into Arnold's brain and look at the chip, buy this movie now.	A
Fight Club	What is it with me giving every Movie on Video a good review? Oh, well. 1999's wierdest movie is so cool, it's not even funny. If you get this movie, get it on DVD though. Two disks for this movie, one that's all features. Even though this is one of the greatest movies in the 90's (for being original), it is a million times better when you can see the full scene of Edward Norton punishing the blonde haired kid and replying "I felt like destroying something beautiful" time after time again. WON'T say anything on the movie it self, though, don't want to give anything away, just rent it.	A-