MENTAL HEALTH MOMENT
MENTAL HEALTH MOMENT
March 16, 2001
"Fall seven times, stand up eight." - Japanese Proverb
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DIVORCE EFFECT ON KIDS DEPENDS ON PARENTS' MARRIAGE
Children of couples who fight the most and loudest tend to fare
better psychologically and socially after divorce than do the
children of couples whose marriage reflects few outward signs of
strife, according to research published in the February edition of
the Journal of Marriage and the Family. The effects of divorce on
children are determined long before a marriage ends and can be either
negative or positive depending on the level of conflict between the
parents, say Penn State sociologists Alan Booth and Paul Amato. Their
research is the first to examine not only how marital conflict shapes
the impact of divorce on the long-time well-being of children, but
also the personal attitudes and social factors that influence
low-conflict couples to end a marriage or remain together. For more,
go to http://www.psu.edu/ur/2001/marriage01.html
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DECLINING MENTAL SKILLS CAN CATCH YOU UNAWARE
Penn State researchers say that we may lose some basic mental skills
and not even realize it. In a study of 15 normal, healthy aged men
and women that is the first of its kind, the researchers found that
the subjects were unable to accurately estimate their prowess at
reading maps, remaining attentive and pantomiming tool use. However,
subjects were accurate in estimating their memory, or their ability
to recall, and several others functions such as mood and vision. Dr.
Anna Barrett, assistant professor of medicine and neurology in Penn
State's College of Medicine, is the study's principal investigator.
She says, if people are unaware of their level of performance, they
can't take countermeasures or seek assistance when these skills
decline. For more on this study presented at the
International Neuropsychology Society, go to
http://www.psu.edu/ur/2001/clueless.html
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Interventions Following A Disaster
WORKERS
The following suggestions may be of use for workers during
the first hours, days and weeks following a disaster:
1. Defusing This might occur quite
spontaneously. Or it might be an organized staff
meeting following an incident or operation. It is
an informal debriefing in which personnel can begin
to talk about their thoughts and feelings about the
incident. It may happen over coffee or cleaning of
equipment. The key is to keep the tone positive and
supportive. Workers should not be criticized for how
they feel or how they functioned. Team members and
leaders should check on each other's well being and
provide support to those who seem to be hardest hit
by the incident.
2. Attend a debriefing if one is offered. Try to get
one organized if it is not offered.
3. Talk about feelings as they arise. Listen to each
other's feelings.
4. When listening, try to keep war stories to a minimum.
It doesn't really help to hear that once-upon-a-time
someone went through something worse. It doesn't help
to hear "it could have been worse, so quit your
complaining".
5. Don't take anger too personally. Anger is a normal
feeling after a traumatic event. It sometimes gets
vented at co-workers inadvertently.
6. Recognition is important. Co-workers should receive
appreciation and positive feedback for a job well
done.
7. Eat well and try to get adequate sleep in the days
following the event.
8. Relaxation and stress management techniques are
helpful.
9. Maintaining a normal routine and "taking care of
business" help maintain a sense of order and
accomplishment.
Returning Home After Disaster Work
Until recent years, little attention has been paid to the
emotional issues faced by those who work on site following
disasters. Homecomings in particular are frequently not
as pleasant and rewarding as the worker had hoped and
planned. Below are some ideas and suggestions for workers
when thinking about and planning for going home:
REST
* Few workers get enough rest while working on a
disaster. They are usually exhausted when they return
home. it is very important to catch up on rest. This
may take several days.
* The need for rest may cause family problems. The
family may want and need the worker's attention,
time, and energy. Their needs must be considered.
Try to anticipate the problem and negotiate your
respective needs carefully.
PACE
* Disaster work is usually fast paced. you may find it
difficult to gear down to a normal pace. You might
find yourself rushing through tasks, moving quickly
to additional tasks, or feeling guilty when you are
not actively engaged in something.
* Try to be tolerant of others who are moving at a
slower pace. They are usually going at a normal pace!
Resist the temptation to see others as lazy, slow,
or uncommitted.
* Before returning, try to anticipate the areas in
which problems concerning pace might come up - both
at home and at work. Thinking through situations
where problems might develop will help you prepare
for the actual situation.
Discussing The Disaster
* You may want to talk a lot about your disaster
experience. Others may be interested. However,
anticipate that:
~ others may not be interested
~ while they may be interested, they have not gone
through the experience and may not feel as intensely
as you.
~ others may want to tell you what has been happening
to them during your absence. Be tolerant and
understanding. What they have been through is as
important to them as your experiences are to you.
* Remember that just because people seem uninterested
in hearing about the disaster, they aren't
uninterested in you. The disaster has been so much
a part of your life for the last few days and weeks
that you may be pre-occupied with your experience
when you return home. While others will be concerned
about your well-being, they may have little interest
in your disaster experience.
* You may not want to talk a lot about your disaster
experience - especially if the experience was a
particularly difficult one for you or if you are
very fatigued. Help those around you understand that
you are still processing or recovering from your
experience and are not ready to talk yet. You may
want to reassure them that this is not an effort to
exclude them, but that you just need some time.
* Understand that you may alternate between wanting
and not wanting to talk about your disaster experience.
This switching may be disconcerting because you may
not be able to predict or control these shifts. You
probably heard the same thing from victims who were
afraid because they could not control their emotions.
Over time, these shifts will become less frequent and
surprising. Understand, and help those around you
understand, that this is a normal and natural response.
Emotional Reactions
Most workers, upon returning home, have emotional reactions
that surprise and sometimes frighten them. If you can
anticipate some of these emotions, you can manage them
better. Below are some examples:
* Disappointment often results when expectations about
returning home do not match the reception. You may
have anticipated happy reunions with family and
colleagues only to find them angry because of your
absence. Try to keep reunion expectations realistic.
* Workers sometimes experience frustration and conflict
when their needs are inconsistent with the needs of
family and colleagues. You often hear of the disaster
worker who returns home after weeks of eating hotel
food, desperately wanting a home-cooked meal, only to
find a spouse who can't wait to go out for dinner!
* You may become angry when you are exposed to people's
problems that seem minor or even trivial compared to
what you have seen at the disaster site. This may
happen reading the paper, watching TV, or talking
with family and friends. it is important to remember
that you can easily hurt people by minimizing their
concerns and problems.
* Most workers have been introduced to the concept of
"victim identification". You have a strong emotional
response to some victims because, in some way, they
remind you of yourself or someone important to you.
The flip side of the same concept occurs when you
return home. Thjat is, friends and family members
(children, spouse, parents, etc.) may remind you of
disaster victims you have seen. This may produce
intense emotional reactions that not only surprise
you, but also surprise and confuse the unwitting
recipient of these emotions. Help others understand
this phenomenon.
* Mood swings are common upon return home. You may
change frequently from happy to sad, tense to relaxed,
outgoing to quiet, etc. These mood swings are normal
and natural. They are part of the process by which
you resolve conflicting and contradictory feelings.
As time passes, these mood swings will become less
dramatic, less frequent, and less surprising.
Children
Dealing with children upon returning home deserves some
special note. It is important to give children information
in ways that help increase their understanding and do
not confuse or frighten them. Help young children understand
why you were away and what you did. Think in advance about
the kind of information they might want and the level of
detail you should provide. It is usually not advisable to
provide dramatic stories or graphic details of damage that
might frighten children and generate fears of their own
vulnerability as well as yours. If you have collected
newspaper pictures and stories, you may want to share them
with older children. Don't forget to encourage children
to talk about what happened in their lives during your
absence. They will find your interest reassuring.
Growth
The days and weeks after returning home from working on
a disaster provide good opportunities for introspection.
You have seen stress, disruption, and destruction. You
have seen people at their strongest and at their most
vulnerable. You have worked under difficult and stressful
circumstances. You have been pulled away, for a variety
of motives, from your day-to-day life, worked and lived
in strange surroundings, and returned home again. You
have undoubtedly gone through some personal growth. To
help understand how you may have changed, ask yourself
the following questions:
* Have you learned anything that can help you grow?
* What was rewarding about the experience?
* What have you learned about your own abilities?
* What have you learned about other people?
* Are there things you would like to do differently
in the future?
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For further information on this topic and to search for and purchase books online,
go to the following search engine and begin your search by trying the following
descriptors: Disasters, disasters and children, disasters and defusing, disasters
and debriefing, disasters and stress, disasters and emotions, disaster workers
and stress, disaster workers and emotions, disaster workers and debriefing, etc.
https://www.angelfire.com/biz/odochartaigh/searchbooks.html
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Contact your local Mental Health Center or
check the yellow pages for counselors, psychologists,
therapists, and other Mental health Professionals in
your area for further information.
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George W. Doherty
O'Dochartaigh Associates
Box 786
Laramie, WY 82073-0786
MENTAL HEALTH MOMENT Online: https://www.angelfire.com/biz3/news
