Lord Woodburry's Corner: News about the Former Empire

(Dr James Woodbury Rowe though loathe to declare his whereabouts is required to report whenever he is in a present or former British territory. Out of courtesy to him, this item is maintained. Contributors may offer any item of general offbeat interest or amusement.)

Mr Prime Minister

PM Tony Blair and his 45 year old wife are now expecting their fourth child. Apparantly, old Tony was pretty busy this year between attempts to resolve Britain's 900 year war and to close the stodgy House of Lords. What will he think of next?

Twice Told Tales

Lord Jeffrey Archer Conservative candidate for Mayor of London has run afoul of the press which accuses him of hiring an alibii witness in a libel trial. The witness never testified at trial and Lord Archer recovered from a paper which accused him of patronising a prostitue. It looks bleak for the well known author says the Manchester Guardian, don't count Archer out until you put him in the box and light it afire.

Holy Hillery!

Hillery Rodmann leads the Mayor of New York City in the polls in the race for the US senate. The critical gap is the number of secret service guards surrounding Hillery, said to exceed the population of the state capitol at Albany. Meanwhile confusion in Hillery's cap was resolved when it was explained that she was running for Member of the senate and not Madam of the House. The Inditer on line press meanwhile celebrates a very Clinton Christmas.

No guts no soiled undies

President Clinton brings tears to the eyes of his Presidential guard when he asked us armed forces to make more sacrifices for the cause of freedom. "they laughed so hard they wet their pants," an oberserver said.