Sephiroth: *strolls into Big Compfy Couch Room on the Death Star and runs into Cloud* Ah, Cloud. Just the person I've been looking for! Care to battle?
Cloud: I'm not like you Sephiroth!
Sephiroth: Oh? Well maybe not anymore. You seemed to be pretty confused awhile ago...
Cloud: Shuddup! I know who I am now. I'm Cloud Strife.
Sephiroth: Are you?
Cloud: Of course! I've pulled my life back together! I know who I am!
Sephiroth: I think you are still confused, young Skywalker.
Cloud: Skywalker???
Sephiroth: *circles Cloud menicingly* Yes. You're name is Cloud Skywalker.
Cloud: No! You're only trying to mess with my mind... my emotions! You can't do this to me! I won't listen! *covers ears and hums 'Mary Had a Little Lamb'*
Sephiroth: Stop trying to hide the truth! Come out of your shell and fight, young Jedi!
Cloud: It ends here, Sephiroth! I've had enough of you! *goes to pull out sword, but instead looks down at a long thin cylinder with buttons*
Sephiroth: *pulls out light saber and a really long red beam of light comes out for the blade*
Cloud: Wh-what is this???
Sephiroth: Your light saber... don't even tell me you don't know how to use it.
Cloud: *shakes the cylinder vigerously*
Sephiroth: No you imbicile!!! You don't do that! Come here and let me show you.
Cloud: *walks over to Sephiroth who turns his light saber off*
Sephiroth: Now all you have to do it push this... see? Then the pretty blue light comes out. What you wanna do is practice pushing the button as you bring your light saber out so that the beam is full length as soon as you're in your fighting stance, okay?
Cloud: *hesitates but then nods*
Sephiroth: Good. Now where were we?
Cloud: *still studying light saber*
Sephiroth: Ah, yes! The battle! Ahem... Come Cloud! Draw your weapon! It is time! Either join me in the Dark Side or die pitifully!
Cloud: The Dark Side?
Sephiroth: *rolls eyes* You really are lost aren't you?
Cloud: I... I don't understand...
Sephiroth: Maybe it'll come back to you later... I'm not going to explain it in depth. Let's just say that the Dark Side is the bad guys.
Cloud: Why do you think I would join the Dark Side?
Sephiroth: I didn't. I just though it was worth a shot.
Cloud: Oh. Okay.
Sephiroth: So now we must battle to the death!
Cloud: Huh? Why to the death??? Why can't we just hurt each other a little until one of us gives up?
Sephiroth: It wouldn't be near as satisfying that way.
Cloud: *sighs and holds up light saber*
Sephiroth: You are too weak! You will join me on the dark side!!!
Cloud: *fools with switches* How... how do you turn this on again?
Sephiroth: *rolls eyes and walks over to Cloud* Look. Push this. To get the full effect, push it while going like this... *makes arm movements*
Cloud: Ah... I see. *pulls out light saber* Okay, now what was it you were saying?
Sephiroth: Oh, yeah... Ahem. You are weak! You will join me on the dark side!!!
Cloud: *gives Sephiroth a side ways glance and puts light saber down* Hold on a sec.
Sephiroth: What now???
Cloud I just told you I wasn't going to join the Dark Side. Now you say I am. You don't have any authority over me!
Sephiroth: Yes, I do.
Cloud: No, you don't.
Sephiroth: Yes, I do.
Cloud: No you don't.
Sephiroth: Yes I do!
Cloud: Do not!
Sephiroth: Do too!
Cloud: Do not do not do not!!!
Sephiroth: *stares at Cloud blankly* This is pointless.
Cloud: No it isn't...
Sephiroth: Oh, shut up!!!
Cloud: *mumbles something unintelligable*
Sephiroth: *sighs* Shall we fight now?
Cloud: *brings up light saber* Sure why not.
Sephiroth: Prepare to die then if you will not Join the Dark Side!!!
Cloud: Wait, wait, wait.
Sephiroth: *getting impatient* What now?
Cloud: This light saber...
Sephiroth: What about it? You had it working!
Cloud: yeah but its way too light. I need something heavier... like my sword. Where is my sword anyhow?
Sephiroth: You can't have a sword! They're too heavy and burdonsome to carry around! That's why they designed these!
Cloud: No... no. I still would rather have my sword.
Sephiroth: Just use what you have!
Cloud: But... but it isn't fair!
Sephiroth: *grinds teeth* Just fight me!
Cloud: What if I end up beating you? Then you'll regret ever telling me to fight you.
Sephiroth: You're stalling.
Cloud: I am not. I'm just telling it like it is... or might be.
Sephiroth: No, you're stalling.
Cloud: I am not.
Sephiroth: Are too.
Cloud: Am not!
Sephiroth: Are too!
Cloud: Am not am not am not!!!
Sephiroth: OH stop it!
Cloud: You started it!
Sephiroth: I did not!
Cloud: Yes you did!
Sephiroth: I did not!
Cloud: You did too!
Sephiroth: Did not did not did not!!!
Cloud: *snickers*
Sephiroth: Stop this insanity!!!
Cloud: I didn't start it.
Sephiroth: Yes you- grrr...
Cloud: *holding up hands defensivesly* What?
Sephiroth: Would you just shut up and fight?
Cloud: Well... you asked for it. *once again pulls out light saber*
Sephiroth: One last chance... will you join the Dark Side?
Cloud: Now how many times do I-
Sephiroth: Sorry! Just asking! Sheesh!
Cloud: *tosses light saber into air* This thing is really light...
Sephiroth: That's why its called a light saber...
Cloud: Oh... well, yeah. But still...
Sephiroth: Fight!!!
Cloud: I am! I am! Gee, never saw a guy who was in such a hurry to die!
Sephiroth: What makes you so sure you'll win?
Cloud: Considering the fact that I killed you once before...
Sephiroth: Not in this galaxy!
Cloud: Where am I anyhow?
Sephiroth: Just fight me! I'll explain it to you as you slowly and painfully die from lack of limbs.
Cloud: Hmmm... so you're saying you're going to chop each limb off? Nice choice. But personally, I would...
Sephiroth: I have had enough of you...
Cloud: What'd I do?
Sephiroth: *rushes toward Cloud, light saber ready*
Cloud: *ducks and spins around, blocking Sephiroth's second attack* You're not bad...
Sephiroth: Feel my rath, young Skywalker!!! *sticks out leg as Cloud runs toward him*
Cloud: *trips and falls to one knee* AGH!
Sephiroth: *holds light saber up to Cloud's neck* No, you will die.
Cloud: You say that with such calmness its scarey.
Sephiroth: *smiles evily*
Tifa: Cloud Skywalker!
Sephiroth: Princess Tifa? What is this? How did you escape from your cell?
Tifa: Cid Solo here helped me!
Cid: *waves and pulls out laser gun* Hello, Darth Sephiroth.
Sephiroth: NO! I planned this out perfectly! This was not supposed to happen!
Tifa: *also holding up laser gun* Well, that's too bad, isn't it?
Cloud: I told you I'd win!
Sephiroth: There will be a next time, Young Jedi! Just you wait! *puts light saber away and flees*
Cloud: *stands* Wasn't that fun?
Tifa: Oh, Cloud! I thought you were done for!
Cloud: Not nearly! *pulls Tifa into his arms*
Tifa: I like a man who can... stay alive...
Cloud: And I like a woman who can come in the nic of time...
Cloud and Tifa: *kiss*
Cid: I hate to break you two up, but we have to get the Millenium Highwind up and out the *&^% of here!
Cloud: Pleasure will just have to wait!
Tifa: *sighs* Cloud?
Cloud: Yes?
Tifa: Cloud!
Cloud: What is it?
Tifa: CLOUD STRIFE!!!
Cloud: *waking up* Cloud Skywalker... I'm Cloud Skywalker...
Tifa: Cloud? Are you okay?
Cloud: Why, Princess Tifa! Did Cid Solo get the Millenium Highwind out of the Death Star before Darth Sephiroth came back and tried to convince us to join him on the Dark Side???
Tifa: *shaking head* I knew I shouldn't have let him go and see that movie!
