Cait Sith: Here we are at the Golden Saucer, ready to witness one of the most amazing feats on the face of this planet... whatever they call it!!! We will be watching as 10 chocobos race at amazing speeds on this winding twisting track. Who will be the victim.. er victor?
Ryan: Hey I'm Ryan! You don't know me, but, that's all right.
Matt: Hey! I'm Bethany's friend, not you!
Ryan: I can be her friend too you know.
Matt: *holds up an intimidating fist*
Cid: What the &$%$ are you two %#$%^# doing???
Ryan: Matt over here thinks he owns Bethany.
Matt: I knew her longer than you!
Ryan: That doesn't mean anything!
Cid: Quit yer ^%#%^# squabbling!
Matt and Ryan: *stick tongues out at each other*
Bethany: You guys are so immature!
Sephiroth: Oooo! Can I cut them up into pieces?
Bethany: Sephy...
Sephiroth: Please???
Bethany: No.
Sephiroth: *goes off and sulks in the ever popular sulking corner*
Bethany: *shruggs* Men.
Rude: *walks to chocobo counter to make a bet*
Lady at the counter: Hello, may I help you?
Rude: ... ... ...?
Lady at the counter: Excuse me sir, can I help you?
Rude: ... ... ...?
Lady at the counter: Look, mister, you wanna place a bet, or what?
Rude: *nodds*
Lady at the counter: Which one? *holds up chart*
Rude: *points at a multi-colored one... the one that Bethany is riding*
Lady at the counter: Brist? The colorful one?
Rude: *nodds, places bet, and walks away*
Lady at the counter: We get some strange ones here.
Sephiroth: *standing at consession stand* Come and get em!
Chocobo Jockey: One well done chocoburger, please.
Sephiroth: One well done chocobo, comin up!
Cloud: Sephiroth... at the chocoburger stand?!
Sephiroth: What, you have a problem with that?
Cloud: No. Its just... You... serving Chocobo burgers... I'm not seeing it.
Sephiroth: Now you do.
Cloud: *walks away somewhat confused*
Sephiroth: Chocoburgers! Hot off the Grill!
Aeris: What???
Sephiroth: Chocoburgers. You want one?
Aeris: Chocoburgers???
Sephiroth: Yeah, made from freshly diced chocobos.
Aeris: *disgusted, covers mouth and runs*
Sephiroth: Hmmm... these things aren't going over too well...
Cait Sith: Attention All Chocobo Jockeys!!! Please Get your chocobos and line up!!!
Barret, Cid, Ryan, Matt, Aeris, Bethany, Cloud, Marlene, Mog, and Yuffie: *get their chocobos and line up on chocobo track*
Bethany: Look! I have a psychedelic chocobo!
Ryan: Cool! Mine is Forest Green.
Matt: Forest Green?
Ryan: Yeah, Forest Green.
Matt: Why don't you just say green?
Ryan: Because. It isn't just green, its Forest Green.
Matt: Well my chocobo is chartreuse.
Ryan: Well... so?
Aeris: My chocobo is pink.
Matt: Like we care.
Aeris: Well, since everyone was naming the color of their chocobo, I thought I would tell you mine too.
Ryan: Bethany, why did you even let her in this ramble???
Bethany: Its funny?
Matt: Ha ha.
Barret: Would ya'll shut yer traps! The race's bout ta begin.
Aeris: Why Barret! Your chocobo is a lovely shade of brown!
Barret: Why thank you, Aeris!
Bethany: Well, she's the only person I know who can melt Barret's foul attitude.
Marlene: Daddy Daddy! Looky at my chocobo!
Barret: Yeah, honey. Its really... small.
Marlene: An' isn't it a pretty purple color too?
Barret: You bet sweetie pies! *looks around at everyone staring at him* What the %^$#'s yer problem???
Bethany: Okay, the only other person besides Marlene...
Cid: What the @#*& is taking so $#%@ long???
Cait Sith: We seem to be having some difficulty. We can't find a chocobo who will let Mog ride it, and we don't know if Cid's Mechanical Chocobo over there is legal.
Cid: My #$%@ chocobo is fine! I built it with my own @$#% hands! Of course its %*&$ legal you stupid cat!!!
Cait Sith: *gulp* Well we still have the problem of Mog... no chocobos will let him ride.
Marelene: You can ride with me, Mr. Mog!
Barret: Darling, I'm sure he'd love to, but if he rides that scrawny bird of yers, there won't be much left of it when he gits off!
Yuffie: Can't we just get going all ready? I have a chocobo race to win here!
Matt: Hey Bette.
Bethany: Yeah Matt?
Matt: Why don't you just write in a chocobo that Mog can ride. Remember, you're the author.
Ryan: That's right, I guess you can do that, can't you?
Bethany: Yeah, I guess I can... Hey Mog! Your chocobo is in the corner over there!
Mog: *looks in corner, only to find a big golden chocobo sitting in the corner. It practically gets under Mog itself, and lines up, ready to race*
Cait Sith: Are we all saddled up and ready?
Everyone: *nods or mumbles*
Cait Sith: Well then... On Your Mark!... Get Set!... GOOO!!!
All chocobos immediately bolt from starting line.
Cait Sith: And their off!!! It looks like Marlene's small purple bird taking the lead! Wait, coming around the bend... here comes Mog and his gold Chocobo! Pulling up next to Mog is Ryan in his Forest Green Chocobo, but wait, here comes Matt on his powerful Chartreuse chocobo! Bethany is moving up, slowly, but surely... but Barret passes her, moving at an incredible speed! And here comes Yuffie, taking the lead. Wait... all the other chocobos seem to be, what's this, turning around and going in the wrong direction!... In exception for Cid's chocobo, which seems to have completely run out of fuel... What is going on!?
Yuffie: *as she crosses finish line* YEAH! I won! I knew I'd do it! I knew it!
Bethany: *pulling chocobo to a stop and riding up to Yuffie* What did you do???
Yuffie: *innocently* What are you talking about?
Matt: All our chocobos seemed to turn in the opposite direction as we neared the finish line.
Yuffie: Its not my fault your birds are stupid.
Bethany: Wait a minute... Cid's chocobo wasn't affected was it?
Ryan: Huh-uh... wait... Do I smell materia?
Matt: Yeah, yellow, manipulative?
Yuffie: Would I do a thing like that?
Cid: $%^% &^$%#(* mechanical chocobo!!!
Barret: &$%^! I lost! *Barret fires gimick arm, sending bullets in all directions. Everyone ducks except for... Aeris*
Aeris: OW! *bullets fly through her body*
Everyone: AERIS!
Aeris: Its okay. I'm all ready dead, so it doesn't matter! Everyone, be happy!
Bethany: This has been fun.
Ryan: Ummm... yes.
Matt: Shuddup, Ryan. No one asked you.
Bethany: You guys, don't.
Ryan: You wanna piece of this?
Matt: No thanks, I'm not like that.
Ryan: You know what I meant.
Bethany: Oh, well.
Yuffie: I won! I won!
Bethany: Cait Sith, tell her what her prize is!
Cait Sith: Guess What? For cheating to win the chocobo races, you've won an all expense paid trip to the ever famous "Corel Prison"! You will be accompanied by the scum of the planet prisoners, you'll eat some wonderful delicacies such as decaying desert worm sausage and sun dried bone fragments! You'll be staying in anything you can find laying around. Hope you have fun!!!
Yuffie: Hey wait- *vanishes into thin air... teleported strit to the Corel Prison*
Ryan: Heh, cool.
Barret: Its what that immature snot deserved.
Cait Sith: All right, what's next? How bout a game show? Anyone up for it?
Everyone but Cait: *leaves*
Cait Sith: Oh, come on! You guys!!!
Sephiroth: Want to buy a chocoburger? They're good!
Well, First of all, thanks Ryan for playing a big part in the story and helping me write the thing! I appreciate it! ^_^ I didn't know where this story was going, and as you can see, it really isn't that long. I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless!
