Delusions of Adequacy (Rochester, NY)
Greatest Hits (Cherub Records)
"Planted firmly somewhere in the vast territory between sincere electronic mix-mash music and joke music made for nothing more than a kick, Kids Techno is probably laughing at us. Sometimes, it's easy to tell which way this artist is leaning, as he takes on a true homage to Wesley Willis one moment and later puts together a chilling, tight track. Sometimes, however, it's hard to tell if you're supposed to laugh, cringe, or be impressed.
That's Kids Techno's greatest fault. You can't always tell when the artist is taking himself seriously, and that makes the music at times difficult to take seriously. But if you can overlook the blatantly bad for the sake of being bad tunes, there's some good music on this release. Kid Techno (the man behind Kids Techno) does just about all the instruments himself, mixing in beats and samples and recording to a 4-track. I can't even begin to tell you what it sounds like, so we'll leave it at that.
There's no real cohesion here. In between actual songs, Kids Techno splices in telephone calls to stores asking if they carry Kids Techno, odd sounds and samples, and annoying little tunes that may be fun to make but are hardly fun to listen to. But you get the sense that Kids Techno knows when they're good and when they're bad, and they include both here purposefully.
Looking at the real tracks here, "Death Comes to People Who Eat" is a heavily distorted instrumental of beats and fuzz, while "Learn to Listen" is a nice (if slightly unoriginal) mix of samples from a audio set-up tape and slick beats and bass. Proving that anybody can do what Wesley Willis does - and thus that artist's draw is clearly more than his music - "Tribute to Wesley" is just another Willis song about Kids Techno, only by Kids Techno. The best track here is the 8-minute "Sleeping Beats," a slick combination of acoustic guitar, record-bips and pops, and sampled vocals that almost send you into a trance. This is a fine piece, the best on the album. And the fuzzed-out album closer would be a decent noisy rock track if not for the Casio beats.
Everyone's going to point out how terrible some of these "songs" are, but the point isn't to compare all of Kids Techno's songs to your favorite band. This guy isn't trying to be slick and well produced. He's trying to have fun, to mix things up, to keep you guessing. And if you're willing to sit through some weird, messy tracks, you'll find some surprisingly good gems on this release. So why the bad songs when he has the talent to do better? I'm not quite sure, but without knowing, I'm not going to deride him for it."
- Jeff (D of A)
Zoopa Loop (France)
Greatest Hits (Cherub Records)
"Kids techno is a mysterious solo project created around Kid techno, the main man behind all the instruments. Only two guys, Paul and David helped him on the funny noisy pop track "First song" where they play bass and guitar. The first thing to say is that "Greatest hits" is not an easy record, the music goes in the opposite direction where all is pretty close to experimentation, sometimes in the funniest way.
There are lots of short tracks on this album, i can call these ones interludes. Some of these numbers are telephone conversations between a guy searching to buy Kids techno's records ( it may be Kid techno himself) and some records salesmen. It seems It's very hard to find these albums. Kid techno uses lots of samples and others bizarre sounds within its music. Some tracks as "Death comes to people who eat", "Sleeping beast" have a big industrial feel in their structures. The spoken words appearing on "Death..." create a robotic effect on the whole song. This one is close to what Scattered Planets recorded on "Drinking with aliens". Others songs as "Learn to listen" or "The joy of bright lights " slightly goes to others musical dimensions. "Learn to listen" explores a more ambient and groovier side as much as "The joy of bright lights"'s structurre turns around some punkish guitars and bass that disappear in the middle of the song to let a more mellow part rising.
I can describe Kids Techno music as a melting pot of sounds, samples, tronics and rock with lots of industrial vibes. If you erase the funny interludes, the songs could be the transcription into music of a very dark Sci-Fi book."
Splendind Ezine
Cherub Comp v1 (Cherub Records)
Next up are "Cowboy" and "Captain T. Neal", both by Kids Techno, just in time to release most the tension created by Order of the Dying Orchid. Kids Techno's vocals sound like the vocalist just sucked up eight helium balloons; the lyrics, however, make up for this annoying effect. "Captain T. Neal" is especially entertaining, pairing lyrics about cleaning poop decks with larger than life, guitar-induced choruses.
Punchline (Richmond, VA)
Greatest Hits / Cowboy EP (Cherub Records)
Combine cheap color copy covers, equally cheap black magic marker-labeled CD-Rs, goofy speeded up/down vocals, four track sampling, cheesy keyboards, strummed reverb-ed-ed-ed-ed-ed... guitar psychedelia and a healthy disrespect for copyright law, and you have the latest D.I.Y. assault on the mass consumer corporate world. I like the shamelessly juvenile humor (several prank calls where chain store clerks are asked if they have Kids Techno music). I like the mix of genres (from techno to indie rock to rap). I like the irreverent odes to pop culture (the several mixes of "Cowboy" confirm the Beef Council's tag line, 'Beef- Its what's for dinner,' while "Tribute to Wesley Willis" shows love for retarded rocker Wesley Willis). But most of all I like this local entity because it reminds me of when Eerie Materials (Kingdom Scum, Everything Eats The Squirrels, The Popsicle Melts, etc.) based their 4-track empire in an undeserving, early '90's Richmond. Get either of these to amuse and/or annoy your CD-collecting, audiophile music snob friends for the holidays. You may or may not have heard this type of thing before, but it is good fun regardless. -Scott Burger
Splendid
Cowboy EP (Cherub Records)
There are many good-hearted, earnest, adventurous music-listening folk out there who just don't care for Ween. These well-intentioned people, many of whom are my friends, just don't see the bong-saturated genius that flowed into such milestones as The Pod, The Mollusk and 12 Golden Country Hits. Fortunately, I believe I can now objectively prove to these good people that Ween are indisputably brilliant geniuses, because Kids Techno has thoughtfully provided a counterpoint to Ween's brilliance. Cowboy EP is what you get when someone without any particular vision, aim or talent gets hold of a bunch of musical equipment and starts huffing Scotchgard. It's an album that might sound good if you were similarly...waterproofed; to those of us in the Puritanical ranks of the sober, it's just a mess. The disc consists of four tracks, including the eponymous "Cowboy", and there are three mixes of same tacked on to the end. "Cowboy" features a high-pitched vocal reminiscent of "Push Th' Little Daisies", but the Ween influence ends there; the song is flat and uninspired in a way that I think is supposed to come off as charmingly, childishly amateurish. Consider, then, that there are four versions of this song on this twelve minute disc. Consider, then, that none are any better than the first. Consider, then, that the other three songs aren't, either. Consider, then, yourself warned. -- Brett McCallon
Review by: hOOchy*
hOOchy* web site
They are: Kids Techno
Who are: Alternative
It is: ‘Greatest hits’
Urrrrrr…… ummmmm…… well….. firstly, I have to stress that it isn’t very often that I can say that I have been rendered quite speechless by a CD. However, to my surprise I almost was after listening to this musical offering! So well done there. To be fair, It isn’t very often that I find it difficult to express my opinions!! Especially with regard to music.
This piece of music certainly cannot be described as bog standard. Quite frankly I’ve never heard anything quite like it before. So, in that sense it is in a league of its own. Consequently, I cannot think of anything to compare it with, so can’t decipher whether it is good or not? Confused? I was. I think you are supposed to be! That aside gut reactions to the songs are the only means of an evaluation here, and in this respect I believe that a bog is probably where this belongs.
Criticisms aside (constructive ones you understand). I think that tenuously the record is good. This is because this record lies on the dimension where it is so bad that it is good, so hated that you begin to love it and marvel at its complete and utter pointlessness and ability to quite literally disturb you. I feel that this is true in particular to the tenth track ‘Sleeping Beauty.’ Through listening to this song, I found a striking contradiction in the emotions aroused by the background narrative (a guy giving suggestions through hypnosis in order to relax you ), and the feeling aroused through the music – which did actually make me feel quite anxious! This all left me feeling in a state of flux, and actually quite mentally drained! Or was that the consumption of too many cups of tea while ploughing through the CD? All the same I’m still worried lest this music get into the wrong hands. It could cause more damage to a preadolescent youth that a limp biszkit or Eminem CD. In fact goddamnit there should be laws against this type of music!
However, I was also well…… not exactly impressed, but in admiration of this guys imagination when creating his music. With music from TV programmes and children’s toys featuring in his songs!! At least he is original and not afraid to be even though to be fair it doesn’t really work. His music isn’t commercial and I don’t see a great future ahead for this guy in the music industry, but that doesn’t mean to say that this guy should give up his creative endeavours.
Rocking or Shocking?
Shocking. 
1/5. Only for those who are sound of mind!!
Elliot_C - Victoria, British Columbia, Canada
check it out here
Well this is certainly very interesting.
I really like the way it's put together.
The monologue is very intersting if you pay attention to it for a while.
trouper26 - Tulsa, Oklahoma
check it out here
Don't Give Up on This... Just Listen!
This doesn't seem like a radio-friendly song, but I do think it's cool. At first I expected the voice to just last a little while and then the band vocals kick in. I like the electric/repetitive/guitar background sounds. They are pretty cool. But the voice alone and the background music is not enough. I thought the music could have "taken off" and given the listen something more. I like the hypnotizing spell of the voice, but the music of the band should have been more interesting and enjoyable. I see that at 4.5 min thru the song the guitars take over. I like this. It is very disturbed and I'm going to rate it high on the "mood" quality. This is something I'd like when I'm drunk and painting or depressed and spaced out. Very cool if I was a pot-head even! 5:30 min - I'm starting to like it more now. A melody is starting to form... sorta. I like the distorted guitars. 6:30 min - There's definitely a guitar melody here. And I still dig the groovy "disturbed mind" mood of this... Please wait while I sip my wine. 7:30 min - I don't like the abrupt guitar in the background. I don't like how it stops and leaves a slight gap. I like the more continuous guitar in the foreground. Overall, an engaging song! I went back and rated it higher than I originally started to. Be careful so that you make a good "first impression" on your listeners. I nearly tuned out at first, but then started digging it!! Keep up the good work! I like it!!
