Chap 5

Doctor Janet Fraiser guided her red Ford Bronco to its parking place in front of Colonel Jack O'Neill's suburban residence. Sam Carter was in the passenger side front seat and Cassie; her fourteen-year-old adopted daughter was in the back seat balancing the already prepared meal that they had purchased at the local supermarket. She was glad to bring the feast, happy to be seeing Sam so relaxed and very pleased to be checking on her two most worrisome patients after several days of leave.

When the Colonel and Teal'c had returned to the SGC almost three weeks ago without their two teammates it had begun a two week long nightmare for the whole command. That two people, one a workaholic genius Air Force officer and the other a rather reticent, shy civilian consultant could have made themselves so necessary and precious to so many people had never even occurred to her. Everybody worried, from the Two Star General to the administration staff to the mechanics to the cooks in the commissary. Have we heard anything? Do we know anything? Do they need volunteers? One or two of her own nurses or med techs were always listening for the alarm klaxons, to rush pell mell to the Gate Room at the drop of a hat to assist in a medical emergency. Then, half a cake, Carter back...and with very, very fortuitous timing. But bad news on Jackson. Missing... really missing... Needing the assistance of the Tok'ra...The Colonel's fear and determination shaping his expressive face into something hard and frightening. Then away again... for days without news. Then finally, the rescue. Their beloved, favorite civilian returned to them in such horrendous condition, the gentle young man beaten so severely as to require multiple treatments on his wounds and the alien drug interactions on his system. The nightmares, the fears, the tears... were the price, all needing to be dealt with.

But he was back now. Back with the people who loved him. All that had to happen now was for Daniel to accept it and put the past behind him. At first, she'd wanted to keep him in the Clinic for further observation. Her training told her to send him to a professional therapist, someone with the proper education and certification. But her common sense advised her to trust in the experience and knowledge of one certain Colonel O'Neill, who had the experience and the commitment to do the best for his friend. This visit would be the test of her decision, whether she had helped or hurt her friends.

The three women climbed out of the vehicle and carefully carried and balanced the food items as they navigated the sidewalk to the front door. Sam, being the tallest, pushed the doorbell without having to shuffle the packages. They could hear the interior bell, but no one came immediately. She rang it again and finally, the door opened.

Colonel Jack O'Neill smiled down at them from the doorway of his home. He took the top container off of Cassie's pile of containers and motioned them into the living room area. As Fraiser passed by she noted a swollen red area on the man's temple. She made a face at him and whispered sotto voce. "What happened to you?"

He made a face at her question. "Tell ya in a minute." He gestured her in. "Daniel's in the shower. I was cleaning his back when you drove up."

Carter and Cassie had already gone into the kitchen and put their food packages on the counter top. The teenager had come back to the Colonel for her welcome hug and kiss. Jack handed the remaining bag off to Carter and as the teenager got her hug, she looked critically at his eye. "Who hit ya, Jack?"

"Danny." He replied honestly. "But don't let on about it, okay. It was an accident and he feels bad about it already."

The girl nodded, sympathetically. "Okay." She looked up at him with her wise eyes and said. "Sometimes, life is a bitch."

He nodded back. "That's the truth, kiddo."

Janet had come back to the two of them and indicated he was to sit down on the couch. "Let me look," she fussed. "Did you lose consciousness?"

"Oh, yea. Several minutes I think." Jack chuckled. "I'd just taken my shower and went to wake him up. Got to woolgathering and touched him while he was still asleep, I woke up on the floor next to the bed."

"Does he know?"

The chuckle turned into a frown. "Yea, and that's the worst part of the whole damn thing." O'Neill continued. "It didn't help the mood at all. But I think we've got it sorted."

"Well, no harm seems to have been done to your Irish head." She smiled impishly down at him. "Just be careful, okay. He doesn't need any...."

"Yea, I know. He doesn't need any of that at all."

"You say he's in the shower?" She changed the subject. At O'Neill's nod, Janet continued on. "Why don't you see if he's ready to come out? I'll do the exam real quick before he gets dressed and we can enjoy the evening without that hanging over his head."

"Sound like a good plan, Doc." O'Neill got to his feet and headed down the hallway into the master bedroom.

Fraiser went into the kitchen to where Sam was futzing with the food. She was opening the containers, pulling down dishes and finding the silverware. Janet pulled the wine bottle out of the brown paper bag and started looking for a corkscrew. In the other room, Cassie had found the TV controls and could be heard surfing through the channels. "I'm going to go check out Daniel before we eat, Sam, but keep the Colonel in here with you okay." She handed the now open bottle of rose' to her friend. "Give him this and sit him down. It may take about fifteen or twenty minutes, cause I need to talk to Daniel alone."

Sam nodded at her seriously. She'd been worried to death about her `little brother' for weeks and it still hadn't worn off yet. "I'll get Cassie to help me sit on him."

Janet picked up her black bag that she had brought in from the car and went down the hallway to the closed door. She could hear the two men talking in low voices; she tapped lightly on the wood veneer door. "Are you decent? Can I come in?"

Jack's voice spoke out loudly. "No, but come in anyway."

She turned the doorknob and pushed into the bedroom. The covers of the bed had been thrown up over the pillows, but it was obvious that it had been slept in a short while ago, both sides of the bed. Daniel was sitting on the edge of the mattress, hair still damp from his shower, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers. Jack was standing in front of him and the two men had been talking she could tell. Jack smiled down at the younger man and patted him on the shoulder, turned and walked past her into the hall. "Be gentle with him. He's still shook."

She nodded at the tone in the Colonel's voice. "It won't hurt a bit."

She crossed over to the bed and her patient. Daniel looked up at her, sans his glasses. "Promise?"

"Sure, sweetie. For you, anything."

Daniel rewarded her lightness with a full-fledged smile complete with teeth. "Hi, Janet."

"Hi, yourself." She put the bag down and pulled her equipment out. Janet gently started to take his vitals so that she had baseline knowledge of where he was. This also was giving him time to adjust to her presence after several days of personal privacy. She knew that he was still mentally suffering from the lack of control over his own body that he had endured during his captivity. While she did these mundane things, he could reach into himself to allow her the more intimate touches that she would need to perform. After doing the basics, she slipped on her gloves, turned him around and looked critically at his back then had him stretch out on the bed. She gently pulled the boxers down, exposing the injured skin on his buttocks. The bruising on his back and rear was still very livid, but that was more due to his fair skin than serious complications. Some of the scabs had come off during the shower and new pink skin showed healthily against his uninjured areas. "Daniel, I'm going to touch you...there. Okay?" He nodded. She quickly did a very cursory anal exam. No new bruising had revealed itself in the several days since his return. That pleased her in more than one way. Whatever penetration that had occurred had done no tissue damage at least. She changed her gloves again. "Daniel, there are some stitches that need to come out. Do you want a shot to relax you?"

"Not really." Came the matter of fact reply. "I kind of like to feel things now."

"Good. I was hoping you'd say that. I'll be careful." She did her work quickly and efficiently, making it as much a non-event as possible. After several different areas had been taken care of, She stood back and allowed him to adjust his boxer shorts.

Next she examined the new injuries that he had inflicted upon himself during his sleepwalking adventure. The cuts were not as bad as she had feared and the Colonel had done a good job of cleaning and treating them with the first aid kit. After rebandaging his hand and foot, she sat down next to him on the bed and turned him around to face her. "So, how are things going otherwise?"

He looked at her and managed a small smile, more for her than himself. "Well, I'm a little shaky still but I feel better. A little more energy, and I'm always hungry." Daniel's smiled at her. "Jack has made it his mission in life to feed me everything in sight."

"Well, as long as it's real food and not just junk." She smiled back, pleased by his demeanor.

"Oh, yes. He's even into listing food groups. Protein, carbos, fresh fruit on waffles, chocolate calcium, the works." He shook his head. "Going with him to a restaurant is an eye opening experience."

"Sounds like a waist expanding one too."

"Oh my God. Janet, I didn't think I could ever eat so much at one time. But watching him is downright scary." He chuckled. "From now on, on missions, I'm making sure there's lots of food. I don't want us to be left alone with him if he ever really gets hungry."

Janet Fraiser was pleased with the casual way he'd just mentioned the Stargate. No hesitation, no fears, just work talk. "Well, if you're ready to get dressed, we stopped at the super on the way in and picked up some food. You can demonstrate your newfound appetite to us." She crinkled her eyes at him. "Cassie picked this special pie that you Must Love."

"If Cassie picked it out, I'm sure I will." Daniel unfolded his long thin frame and stood up by the bed. Then Janet saw it. A bright red mark on his belly. Daniel must have realized the same time she did what she was seeing. He immediately did a most impressive about face and grabbed a tee shirt from the top of the dresser and pulled it over his head.

"Daniel."

"Uh,...yes."

"What is that mark on your stomach?"

"Mark?"

"Bite."

"Oh..."

"Daniel?"

He inhaled, then exhaled, then turned around. "Uh, well...."

She sat, not saying a word, waiting. What did she think? Janet didn't know what to think. It looked for all the world like a ... hickey. But...

"Oh, nuts, Jan. Look, Jack was asleep. I woke up and started picking on him. We started to...play...you know roughhouse. We got silly." He shrugged. "It's not a big deal."

She looked at him questioningly and crossed her arms in front of herself. "Okay, if you say so. But you've got to be careful you know. Those drugs are still in your system. You get too wound up; you could have a fainting spell or another blackout."

"Yes Jan."

"Honestly, you men are like little kids."

"Yes Jan."

She shook tilted her head and gave him snake eyes.

"Jan?"

"Daniel."

"Can we go eat now? Jack has probably started on the pie."

*****

The two of them emerged from the bedroom together. Daniel had pulled on a pair of Jack's old sweat pants and tucked the tee shirt in the tied string waist. He and Doctor Fraiser were talking between themselves.

When Cassie saw her second-favorite-uncle she immediately put her plate down and trotted over to Daniel, but she stopped a foot or so in front of him and looked up into his face with a serious expression. "Hi, Daniel."

He stopped and returned her look. "Hi, Cassie."

"How are you feeling?"

He smiled at her. "I'm feeling much better, but I have a problem."

Her eyes grew in size and a determined look came over her face. "What?"

"I really need a hug. Your mom took some stitches out and I hurt a little bit, so I need a hug, but a kinda easy one."

"I can do hugs; easy hugs are my special tonight." She slipped her arms around his waist and softly wrapped them around him. He bent and kissed her on the top of her head. "Thank you, Cassie."

Sam wandered over beside the two huggers. "Can I have one too?"

He looked up and smiled, with teeth this time. "I guess, what do you think, Cass?"

"Okay, but watch her...she hugs hard."

Sam laughed at the girl. "I promise I'll be careful."

*****

Several hours later, Doctor Fraiser managed to corner and contain one Full Bird Colonel who had been on the run from her for the entire evening.

He'd gone off to get the last piece of the Apple Carmel Pecan Pie that was the desert. He hadn't had any yet...had in fact, insisted that Daniel have at least two pieces. That left the three for the girls and the one lone survivor for him. When he took the crust off of Danny's plate, the younger man had given him a direct order and told Jack to go eat it before he just drooled away at the very thought of the remaining piece. He lifted the plate and was about to return to the living room when he turned and nearly stepped on the petite physician. "Oops sorry, Doc. Didn't see ya there."

"Colonel O'Neill, we have to talk."

"Talk?" He looked over her head and realized the kitchen door was no longer propped open. It had been closed...and probably had a Do Not Disturb sign on its other side.

"Talk," she said firmly.

"Okay." He motioned her to the breakfast nook. He put the plate down on the counter and followed her progress, stopping only to pour two cups of coffee for them. They sat down across from each other. "So talk."

"I did a complete exam on Daniel this afternoon when I got here." She added a teaspoon of sugar to her cup of coffee. "A complete exam."

"Yes." He nodded sipping his black plain coffee. "I remember that."

"I want to talk to you about my discoveries."

He sat waiting.

"First of all, I want to say that I am very pleased with his recovery status." She started out. "His injuries are healing well and quickly. His overall condition is much better and he has regained much of his normal outlook and attitude of life. He's gained weight successfully...I don't know how much exactly without a scale, but I can see he's filling out again. I am concerned about one or two things, though."

Jack nodded. This was okay so far; in fact it sounded great to him.

"First, I'm concerned about the blackouts and sleep disturbances. Is he talking about dreams or flashbacks at all?"

"Yea, at his apartment I witnessed a flashback. But it only lasted a minute or two and he figured out what was causing it. I think he handled it successfully." At her look, he continued to tell her about the fish tank episode.

She nodded. "That's good. I can report that to MacKenzie tomorrow, in a generic sense of the word. He doesn't need to know the details. It's very good." She indicated O'Neill's growing black eye. "What about that?"

He shrugged. "This was my fault, as I told you. I put my hand on him to wake him up, he spooked and swung around and caught me with a fist." He raised his hand to the bruise. "I know better now."

"How did he react?" She looked concerned.

"When I woke up on the floor, he was sitting next to me holding on to my hand with a grip like iron. He was out of it for a while, but with slight stimulation, he came around and we talked about it."

"What kind of stimulation?" She looked at him sharply.

"I, uh, I tapped him on the cheek with my open hand. Not hard, just enough to get his attention."

She nodded. "Colonel. Did you bite Daniel?"

Jack wanted to just curl up and die...right then...right there, but Daniel was the important one here and he wouldn't lie to her direct question. "Uh huh."

She continued on not reacting. "I saw it during the exam. I asked Daniel what had happened. He told me that you were asleep and he started playing with you." Jack sat upright in his chair. She ignored him and kept talking. "He said you woke up and the two of you started to `roughhouse', was the word he used. Daniel said you two were `playing'." She stopped and looked up at Jack. "What do you say?"

He looked into his black coffee in his white mug. "Yes, yes, that's what happened. He was picking on me and we wrestled a bit. I guess, I don't know...I guess I did...a little...."

Janet took pity on the suffering man. "Look Colonel...I do not pretend to comprehend your friendship with Daniel, I know you'd do anything for him. But Jack, please be careful. He's been through a lot. He needs you. But don't do this to him. He's not your son. I don't want to have to worry about you both."

He just stared at her.

She continued. "Too much activity could still cause a reaction to the drugs his system has yet to shed. Excessive exercise could cause dizziness; it could stimulate another blackout, maybe even a heart attack. Just be careful, okay?"

"Careful, heart attack?" was all he could manage. "Careful."

"Yes, I'm going to recommend another week of medical leave for him until I'm sure we've got all the chemicals purged from his system. I'm sure it's just a matter of time. Just keep feeding him all that protein, carbohydrates, chocolate calcium...you know. The good stuff." She smiled at him. "And Colonel...no more hickeys please. It embarrassed the hell out of him." She smiled at him, got up, walked over to the counter, picked up his piece of pie and put it in front of him. Then she turned and walked out into the living room.

Then the door closed and Jack O'Neill dropped his head to the table with a thump.

Chap 6

It was dark outside when the women left that evening. They had gotten together as friends, and for Doc Fraiser to check on Daniel's condition. It had all been innocent enough in the beginning. Then, the legendary O'Neill luck had raised its ugly head and started to look around for victims.

He should have known it was too good to be true, too easy to be right, too desired to be real. He loved Daniel Jackson. No strike that statement, your honor. He was 'in love' with Doctor Daniel Jackson: Egyptologist, Archeologist, Linguist, Anthropologist, Sociologist, Historian, Psychologist, Geekologist, Space-monkey, Plant-boy, Grasshopper, and the sole proprietor of the bluest eyes in the known Galaxy. He was in love, so be it, no problem. That little piece of heaven was still number one on his hit parade. But, he was doomed...by a five foot three inch U. S. A. F. Medical Doctor. And why?

"Cause I have the moral turpitude of a fourteen year old football star on steroids, that's why!" Jack mumbled to himself as he closed and locked the door behind his nemesis. "Because I was handed a treasure and I had to carve my initials in the side panel." He stood for a moment in front of the dead bolted, metal-cored exterior door and he rested his forehead against the faux wood grain.

Janet knew and he knew she knew that he knew she knew. And she was a Military Doctor, and as such had regulations, requirements and codes of behavior. She would have no choice in the matter at all; she would have to 'out' him, to report his suspicious and untoward behavior to a subordinate.

He was so lost in his internal diatribe that he didn't hear Daniel come up behind him to stand a few feet away. "Jack?"

He jumped slightly, startled by the soft voice. "Danny."

A soft hand pressed on his shoulder. "Jack, what's wrong?" O'Neill could only shake his head. The hand curled its way around his bicep and tugged gently in its direction.

"Yea, Danny." O'Neill tried to keep his emotions under wraps as he turned to face the younger man. He was a little abashed to see the concern there for him. "I'm sorry, did you want something?"

"Well, uh..." Daniel looked at him in confusion. "Jack, it's late. I'd like to go to bed. Do you uh, are you coming?"

Jack looked into the face of his friend, now lover. He knew that if he pulled away from the younger man now, at this stage of his recovery, emotionally Daniel would want to take the blame, believe that it was his fault.

But now, now Jack needed a little time to recover from the Doc`s remarks, to consider what actions were needed. Of course, it wasn't Daniel's fault, he was the victim, but that wouldn't even enter into Daniel's feelings. "I was thinking of going up to the deck for awhile." Jack avoided looking at him directly. He needed to think about what he was going to do and if he went with Daniel...well, thinking was not going to be what happened in the next lotsa hours. "I need to....get some fresh air."

Daniel looked at the older man apprehensively. There was something terribly wrong here. Not six hours earlier, Jack had been in a very happy, relaxed mood. They'd discovered something about themselves; their relationship, and they'd been happily wrapped up in discovering where it could possibly go. Now, Jack was withdrawing from him. Maybe, maybe he'd been wrong, maybe Jack didn't feel the same way as he did and was he just putting up with his emotional obsessions to make him feel secure. Maybe Jack needed some room after answering all of his needs. "Okay, well...I'm a little tired...so I'm going to go to bed."

Jack nodded. "Okay. Look, I'll be up later, okay."

Daniel nodded. "I'll be waiting." He turned and limped up the stairs into the hallway that let to the bedrooms. God, that has sounded so pathetic.

*****

On the way out the back door, Jack grabbed another bottle of beer. He then headed up the steep, permanent ladder of narrow stairs that led to his observatory. It had been several weeks since he'd spent time up here. The telescopes were all locked in their permanently mounted cases. He fumbled with the combination lock in the dark for awhile but after a minute or so he just gave up and sat down on one of the metal folding chairs looking up at the stars. 'Fuck. What's wrong with me?' He wondered, tilting the beer bottle up for a long draw. The stars looked down on him without comment.

*****

Daniel undressed and lay down on the king-sized bed in the master bedroom. What was wrong with Jack? Had he said something wrong at dinner? Had he done something? He looked up at the shadowed ceiling to the spot where he knew that Jack was probably sitting right this minute. He had to figure out what was wrong. The young man started thinking back to what had happened; trying to place the moment he'd felt the change in his lover's contact with him. They'd been napping in each other's arms after a rather emotional lovemaking episode. Daniel had to smile. When he had taken Jack in his mouth and his lover had lost control, he felt like he held one of Jack's astronomical heavenly bodies by a leash and it had gone nova in his arms. The man was a force of nature. No, that was not a reason for this new feeling he was getting. Even the after-play had been powerful, with Jack's declarations of emotional commitment couched in terms like 'eat you with a spoon'. Daniel liked that picture. Then, they had then fallen back to sleep, with Jack wrapping both arms around him and holding him like he'd never let him go.

Then things had gone so wrong. The next thing he remembered, Jack was sitting on the floor with him, gently tapping his cheek, while he slowly became aware of where they were. He didn't remember how they got there nor did he have any idea of how long. But when he realized why they were there...that he'd attacked Jack in his sleep and injured him, he had been badly shaken. His wild blow to the temple could have seriously hurt or killed Jack! O'Neill had laughed it off, saying that he should have known better that to wake him up by touching him; but for some reason, the feelings of acceptance had moved on to nervousness. Yea, well if someone he thought loved him reached over and cold-cocked him for no apparent reason he might be nervous too. He might even be a little concerned for that person's mental status. Immediately after that, Jack had rushed him into the shower and then announced that Janet was on her way and she wanted to examine him. Daniel frowned; an unappealing idea was beginning to take shape. Did Jack think that he'd become unstable? That he was crazy, dangerous or both? That Janet had been called at all bothered him. Jack had said that it was because of the injuries he'd sustained during his blackout...Daniel closed his eyes...yes. That was it...the blackouts, the night terrors, the sleepwalking, the assault. Jack thinks I'm crazy. That must be it. Jack thinks I'm crazy, and he's trying to figure out what to do with me. No! He told me...he wants to retire...and me to resign. So he can stay here with me and take care of me....oh, god.... what's happening to me!

*****

There's got to be a way that I can stop this from happening to Daniel. Jack's thoughts were running around in his head like little fireflies, lots of little pieces that wouldn't stay together long enough to form a plan. Course, he had to admit that three or four beers and a couple of glasses of that expensive wine that Janet kept buying for them... He shook his head. Stop it ...got to think.

First, he'd have to find out what Danny had said to Fraiser. What in the world had made him give Daniel a hickey for god's sake? 'It embarrassed the hell of him', that's what the mini-doc had said. Well, what did he expect, of course it would...it embarrassed the hell out of him and he's the one that did it. And after spending two weeks as a slave being trained by abuse and drugs, of course Daniel would be scared of being used like that again... by someone he'd trusted to take care of him. Someone who said he loved him.

*****

He had to talk to Jack... Daniel got up and pulled his sweats and shirt back on. He had to find out what Jack had said to Janet about his craziness, hpw he was dangerous to be around. Oh, he knew, well was pretty sure, that Jack wouldn't let him be committed or anything... Why else would he talk about retiring. Daniel, in his haste, left the house by the closest door, the front door. After he stepped outside, the heavy steel cored door swung shut behind him. "Damn it Daniel. C'mon, get a grip for Pete's sake." The frustrated man spoke out loud to himself as he realized that he'd just locked himself out of the house. He shook his head and walked around to the back yard, limping on his bare feet as the cold wet night grass soaked through the bandage on his cut foot.

*****

Well, sitting up here was not doing anyone any good, Jack decided. He had to talk to Daniel. Jack got up from his perch on the rooftop and climbed down the steep rungs to the ground. He quickly made ground level and entered through the rear, kitchen door. Jack turned the button, insuring that he had locked the door, then he went through the house and started up the short flight of stairs to the upper level bedrooms.

******

Janet Fraiser pulled her Bronco into Sam Carter's driveway. "Mom," her daughter popped up over the back seat, "Mom, I have to use the bathroom."

"Okay, honey. I want to talk to Sam anyway." She glanced over at her friend sitting in the front seat next to her.

"Well, come in then." Carter opened her door and handed the house keys to Cassie. "I'll make a pot of coffee. I guess SG1 is still on downtime so I can come in and work on that experiment tomorrow when I want to."

Janet nodded as she followed the tall blonde woman up the sidewalk. They followed the teenager into the small comfortable house.

*****

Daniel climbed the ladder to the roof slowly. The night breeze had picked up and the thin sweats and tee shirt he was wearing was no protection against the damp air. He winced as the soggy bandage on his foot slipped, leaving the now exposed wound unprotected. As he got to the top of the landing, he realized that Jack was no longer there. Too tired and cold from his exertions, Daniel sat down numbly on the metal chair. Jack was gone.

*****

Jack hurried up to his bedroom and turned on the light. No Daniel, damn it! What? Didn't he even feel comfortable enough to sleep in their bed? Where was he? Jack turned and went into Daniel's old room where he had stayed when he'd first returned from Abydos with Jack. Not there either. Jack quickly checked the hall bathroom. Then, he had a thought. Daniel had been talking to Cassie about his fish; maybe he'd said something about going to his apartment. Jack didn't know what to think. He looked for the truck keys.they were still on the hook in the kitchen. He hadn't driven, where was he? Surely he wouldn't have walked anywhere, it was too late, and it was turning off cool.

*****

After the coffee had brewed and Cassie taken over the television controls, Janet and Sam were able to sit down at the table and talk without interruption.

Sam added an almond-flavored creamer to her cup of coffee and Janet stirred in some sweetener in hers. "So, what?' Carter looked across the table.

"Hum, yes, well what indeed." Janet replied mysteriously. She studied the hot black liquid swirling in her coffee cup after she removed the spoon. "What do you think about the relationship between the Colonel and Daniel?"

Sam smiled at her friend. "As far as I know, they are good close friends. They know more about each other than anyone else does. Daniel has died at least once, on Abydos, to save the Colonel. He threw himself in front of a staff weapon blast. I know the Colonel has risked his life and limb to save Daniel more than once." She took a sip of her coffee. "Of course, they've also done the same thing for Teal's and I."

"Humm," Janet looked at her.

"What? What are you thinking?"

"How close is too close, Sam?"

"Oh, no.not me Janet. I love both those guys. I don't know anything. I don't ask and I don't care!" She shook her head definitely. "Sorry, mean you're my friend and all.."

"Whoa, whoa. Take it easy." Janet reached over and took her hand. "Sam, first of all I can't ask...and I sure couldn't say anything to you or anyone else for that matter. I don't care a flip about anything except something that might be damaging or harmful to my patients." After Carter calmed down, she released her pal and patted her hand.

"Well, the Colonel would not hurt Daniel in any way, shape or form." Sam stated firmly.

"I know that, Sam."

"Janet, Jack O'Neill would die before he hurt Daniel." Sam frowned in her direction. "Any of us would."

"I know that too, Sam," the doctor admitted.

Carter looked at her suspiciously. "Then why? What are you asking? Did you see something?"

Janet shook her head. "No, nothing of any importance." She smiled at her friend. "Except Daniel looks a lot better, he's gained weight and he has a lot more energy." She continued. "Daniel said that the Colonel is on a mission, and has been feeding him...a lot."

Sam giggled. "The Colonel has been trying to get Daniel fattened up since we came back from Abydos the first time. Now, he's got Daniel in his clutches and he looks like he's taking advantage of the opportunity."

"Well, whatever he's doing, it's working." Janet nodded. "Now, if he could just keep Daniel from hurting himself anymore with these episodes of his."

"He will. The Colonel will figure something out." Carter nodded confidently "He always does. He knows Daniel better than anyone else, well, except for Sha'uri."

Fraiser could only nod. "I'm just afraid that the Colonel is too close to see what's going on, that he won't recognize Daniel's needs in time." She took a sip of her coffee. "I did warn him not to let Daniel get too active too soon. He was so. concerned. I just told him to be more careful and not let Daniel get worked up over anything. He's still got too many unknown drugs in his system and he might have another blackout or something." she pursed her lips at the memory of that conversation. "You know, I think I scared him. I didn't even realize it at the time.

******

Daniel sat on the roof for a few minutes before he decided that it was stupid to sit up on the roof and freeze. He'd have to try and get into the house somehow. Where the hell had Jack gone? As he swung over the edge and put his foot down on the narrow stairs, the wet bandage from his foot hung on a splinter and caught, throwing his weight distribution off and putting it on his injury. Daniel grabbed for the roof, and got a purchase with his injured hand and the tender newly forming flesh tore through. He jerked back in pain and lost his balance. As he hung between heaven and earth, he could hear the blood in his ears and everything went black.

*****

The phone rang in the living room. The heard Cassie answer it. "Hi Jack. Yea, just a minute." The girl brought the cordless receiver into the kitchen. "It's Colonel Jack.he sounds upset."

Carter took the instrument from her. "Colonel, it's Carter. What.? No." She looked at Janet. "No, sir. Yes, sir, we'll come right over." She turned the phone off. "Daniel's gone."

*****

O'Neill had just disconnected the phone from Carter. He'd looked all over the house and around the front yard. Daniel's tennis shoes were still in the bedroom. His light jacket was still in the closet and the only clothes that were missing was his own disreputable sweat pants and t-shirt that Danny had been wearing that evening. The truck keys were there; he hadn't left with the women. Jack stood in the middle of the living room. Then he heard a heavy sound in the back yard. It had sounded all the world like.... A body falling.

*****

Fifteen minutes later, the Bronco was pulling into O'Neill's street. All the lights in the Colonel's house were on and the front door was wide open. The three women ran in the house. The phone was lying on the floor disconnected, and O'Neill was nowhere to be seen. The back door was also standing ajar.

"Colonel!" Sam called out in a loud voice. "Colonel, where are you?"

"Carter, Doc." Jack's voice rang from the back yard. "He's out here.I think he fell from the roof."

"Ohmygod!" Sam ran towards the back door.

Janet caught Cassie before she ran after Carter. "Go get my bag from the car! Go. Quick!" Then she ran following the other woman out the back door.

The yard's lighting was turned full on. O'Neill was crouched down over the fallen man. Daniel had landed on his back and was lying flat out on the cold wet grass. "He's breathing, but he unconscious...I haven't moved him, Doc. I've just.I've."

"Colonel, here. It's fine. Let me look, okay." She knelt down next the her patient and started checking her patient for more injuries. Sam moved in and put her hands on O'Neill's shoulders to calm him and keep him from blocking the doctor's light.

He looked up at her. "I'm okay. I couldn't find him in the house. Just when you hung up, I heard him."

"Why would he leave the house?" Sam asked confused.

"He was a little upset." Jack rubbed his hands across his face. "I.so was I. I had gone up to the deck for a while, and I guess he was looking for me."

Fraiser sat up on her knees, breathing in relief. "As far as I can tell, he's just knocked out.there's no blood or even much of a bump." She looked up at the edge of the roof where a small telltale strip of gauze fluttered in the breeze. "He might have just gotten dizzy from the height and.fainted."

Carter looked at her in amazement. "Janet, Daniel has stayed conscious through a staff weapon blast. He doesn't faint!"

Fraiser shook her head. "That's what I keep telling everyone, but no one is hearing what I`m saying. This is NOT the Daniel you all know. He's still full of unknown alien drugs! His metabolism is still out of whack. It's only been a week! That's why he's so.emotional and flighty." A slight movement from the still form on the ground at her knees brought their attention back to him. "Daniel." She bent down again. "Daniel, can you hear me?"

"Oh, shit." A soft moan. "God that hurts." He looked up at the four worried sets of eyes. "What happened?" He moaned.

"What hurts, honey? Your head?" Janet felt around the back of his skull again, searching for anything she might have missed.

"No, my hand. I think I tore it open again." Daniel grimaced as Janet gently picked up the wounded extremity and turned it over into the light.

"Oh, God.yes, yes you did." Jack muttered when he saw the injury. Daniel's whole palm looked like it had been peeled back.

Janet looked at it critically, then shook her head, releasing the injured member. "You sure did, sweety." Then she looked at O'Neill. "Help me roll him over, Colonel." Then she and O'Neill shifted him to his left side facing Jack. The Doctor continued her palpations of his neck and spine. "Do you hurt anywhere on your back or your butt?"

"No, just my hand and my foot." He tried to sit up. "Knocked the breath out of me."

Jack put a gentle hand on his shoulder and held him down. "Just lay there, please." He pleaded, shook his head and took a deep breath. "What the hell were you doing on the roof anyway?"

"Looking for you. I couldn't find you." Daniel answered in a subdued voice.

Jack picked up Daniel's hand and held it gently, examining the reopened wound in the floodlights of the backyard.

"I was in the house looking for you, you crazy idiot!" As he watched, Daniel's expression dropped. "What? What's wrong?"

"I'm not crazy, Jack. At least I don't think so" He looked from Jack to Janet. "I just fell, I'm okay."

"Yea, right. You just fell off the damned roof." O'Neill blustered, becoming flustered now that it was over and disaster-Danny had apparently not been seriously injured.

"He's right, Daniel. You could have been killed." Fraiser frowned at him, then glanced at O'Neill. "As far as I can tell, Colonel, he's not seriously hurt. The ground was damp and soft enough to absorb the impact. His being unconscious when he hit probably helped also."

"I think I was." Daniel admitted sheepishly. "I was climbing down and stepped on my sore foot, then when I grabbed the eve of the house I hung my hand and I think I passed out from the pain up there."

O'Neill just dropped his head and shook it. He didn't say another word.

Fraiser looked at the little tableau for a second and twitched. "Come on, Daniel. Let's get you up and into the house." She grasped him by his forearms and supported him as he sat up. O'Neill shifted around behind him and put his arms under Daniel's shoulders and lifted him bodily. Together they got Daniel standing and O'Neill pulled Daniel's arm around his shoulder to support him on his injured foot. Janet, Sam and Cassie followed them into the kitchen.

Fraiser opened her med kit and pulled out her equipment. As soon as they got Jackson sitting down she started with his baseline readings, matching them to the ones she had taken earlier.

O'Neill stood and watched with his hands on his hips. Cassie slipped up beside him and hugged Jack's slender waist. "Can I help you, Jack?"

He smiled down at her earnest expression and kissed her on the forehead. "You already did baby; you got your Mom here." O'Neill looked around, then asked. "Can you go and turn off all my lights and close the doors for me?"

The adolescent girl nodded, released him and trotted off. Carter came up and put her hand on her C.O.'s shoulder. "Any orders for me?"

He shook his head. "Thanks Carter, you've already done it all." He hugged her and kissed her on the side of her head. She looked up at him and he shook his head. "What am I gonna do with him?" He mourned. "He's gonna kill me one way or another."

Carter giggled. After the panic when she learned her friend was missing again, then his location and subsequently being all right, the release was inevitable. O'Neill looked at her and tried not to laugh but wound up chuckling also and the two Air Force Officers, clasping each other around the shoulders left Janet and Daniel in the kitchen and staggered into the living room laughing hysterically.

Janet looked up from examining Daniel's hand injury and stared at them as they left the room. She looked from them to her patient. He just shrugged. She pulled her black bag open and started gathering the necessary equipment.

Chap 7

Daniel watched with interest as Janet tried to salvage as much of his palm's skin as she could. They were sitting in the kitchen at the table. Janet had chosen this spot because of the strong light that allowed her to see properly. She wanted to do this quickly, before the wound began to deteriorate. He could see the way her mouth moved and little words came out as she `talked' to the suture needle and `encouraged' the tissues of his hand back together. He hand was completely numb from several deadening agents she had injected into it before starting the difficult task. A calm part of his archeologist mind identified it as a healing prayer right out of the human races ancient past.

"Jan, can I ask you something?"

"Um hum."

He sat there a moment, trying to use the words to get the maximum result. "Janet, am I...uh, well...crazy?"

She looked up at him and shook her head. "Are you what? Crazy? Daniel, what made you ask that?"

"Well. I mean, I'm not your average guy." He started reasonably enough. "I've always been a little different. Could it be that I'm, well...eccentric...and getting worse?"

"Daniel, you're not crazy! You just have a different perspective than some people, but that`s because you grew up differently." She gave him a little smile. "You're not mentally unstable or unbalanced at all, and if you're crazy, it's like a fox." She paused. "What made you ask that?"

"Jan," He took a deep calming breath before he continued. "I attacked Jack. I hurt him, and I don't even remember doing it." He looked at her intently. "I keep losing track of things while I'm doing them. I wake up in places I don't remember going to sleep in and I've done things that I don't remember doing or why I did them."

She looked at him seriously. "Let me finish this, and we`ll talk." She said as she took a series of very fine stitches along the edge of his palm. She then wrapped it tightly first in heavy gauze, then in an ace bandage. Then she got up and pulled the remaining wine out of the refrigerator and poured two glasses full.

"Getting me tipsy isn't going to make my questions go away." Daniel told her sadly.

"No," the doctor replied lifting an eyebrow at her patient. "But maybe it will relax you enough to listen to my answers...not that you've been listening until now anyway." She sat one of the glasses down on the table in front of him and one in front of herself. She pulled her chair closer to him. "Daniel...you are not crazy, you are suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome."

He opened his mouth to speak. Janet laid a finger on his lips. "Your body was wounded. Then, it was poisoned by drugs not meant to be used on humans, well, Earth humans anyway. People got inside your head and made you do things and did things to you that you had difficulty dealing with...so your body and mind dealt with it as best it could. You ran, you hid and you fought back as would any normal person. Then, suddenly, you're back home, voila! But your subconscious mind is having a little trouble accepting that this is real. Add to that, all those drugs are still in your body...making it believe that you are still at risk. So, when you're surprised either by someone startling you or by a situation or certain action, the subconscious mind reacts in a way it deems necessary." She gently laid her hand on his forearm and stroked it. He stared at her hand. "It wouldn't matter if it were the Colonel or Sam or even Cassandra; if someone sneaks up behind you and grabs you, you will try to defend yourself. That it happened to be Jack O'Neill is just a coincidence...or at least. Just because he was the one there to do it."

Daniel took a deep breath and nodded. "That's what he said." Then he grinned ruefully at the door.

Jack was leaning in with an innocent look on his face. "Can I come in?"

Fraiser looked at Daniel. "I'm not sure..."

Daniel smiled at him. "It's okay Jan. Really."

She looked back at Jack and shrugged. "For now..."

O'Neill slipped in and closed the door into the living room. "Carter and Cassie are watching some Warrior Princess thing on TV," he added for no apparent reason. He then went to the fridge, grabbed a beer and sat down across the table from Daniel and the doctor.

Fraiser looked at O'Neill with a warning. He was to be there for support only. He nodded, message received. "So, as we were saying Daniel, you're just reacting in a very normal way to a very abnormal situation. You hit Jack because Jack startled you, not because you wanted to hit Jack."

"But what about the blackouts?"

She thought a moment. "Tell me about one, then we'll talk about when you went blank. Let's find the trigger mechanism."

Daniel looked at Jack and he nodded supportively. "The first time I can think of was at my apartment. I was looking at the fish and I noticed that the male had gotten in with the females. I'm going to have so many fish; I'll have to start an adoption agency." He tried to laugh it off. "So I took the net and was going to scoop the male out when..." his voice wavered. "I saw Sam's face. It just appeared in front of me...and the next thing I woke up in my bed." He looked at Jack. "I don't know what happened."

Jack shifted in his chair, but didn't say a word. Janet looked at him curiously. "You were there, weren't you?" He nodded. "Do you have an idea?" He nodded. She looked at him. "Go ahead Colonel. Tell us what you saw."

"Daniel was scooping fish. Then suddenly, he backed away, bumped into the wall and fell, just staring at the tank. I went over and talked to him." Jack looked at the younger man. "You said `They shouldn't be separated...like they separated Sam and me'. I knew it was a flashback." O'Neill frowned and glanced at Fraiser. "When we found Carter on the planet, she reported what had happened to you. I remember she had said that you had tried to convince your captors to keep the two of you together."

Daniel nodded. "Yes, I thought we'd be easier to trace, so I told them that we were a `breeding pair`. He didn't care, he said we were worth more separate."

"How, they shouldn't be separated...like they separated Sam and me." Jack repeated softly. "You were separating the fish...the breeding pair."

Janet looked at him. "Almost your exact words, Daniel." She looked at O'Neill. "What happened next?"

"I got him up off the floor, and took him into his bedroom. He didn't say a word. I put him to bed and then just cleaned up the mess, hung around and called out for Thai food. After about an hour, Daniel woke up and seemed pretty normal. We ate and started to veg out." Daniel nodded, O'Neill continued. "He decided to sleep on the couch so I went to the bedroom. Then several hours later...I heard him." He looked at Daniel. "You were having a nightmare. By the time I got up, you were in the bathroom. Then something broke and I found you on the floor again, cut and bleeding from some broken glass."

"Colonel, what do you think precipitates these `episodes'?" Janet asked.

"Do you mean the individual trigger mechanisms, or the underlying cause?" he asked her seriously. He then shrugged. "A trigger is going to be something slightly different each time. The fish thing was from an image of being separated from Carter. When he hit me, it was because I startled him." He sighed, then shook his head. "Now this roof deal is a total loss on me. I don't know what...."

"No, Jack, I didn't have a blackout on the roof." Daniel put in. "I passed out because I ripped my hand open again when I was climbing down."

Fraiser looked at him curiously. "Why were you on the roof, anyway?"

Daniel looked at O'Neill. "I was looking for Jack."

Jack stared back at him. "I was in the house looking for you."

"I looked in the house, you weren't there."

"Well, I was just on the roof and you weren't there either." Jack shook his head in amazement.

"Why were you looking for me?" Daniel asked confused. "You were just avoiding me."

"No, I said I had to do some thinking. I wasn't avoiding you. You said you were tired and went to bed." Jack looked at Daniel. "I came looking for you in the bed and you'd left."

"Well, I had been to bed but you didn't come and so I got up and went looking for you, ass!"

"I'm an ass? I'm not the one who gets up out of a warm bed and climbs up on a cold roof and falls twenty-five feet just so he can make me crazy."

Daniel's eyes got bigger. "I didn't..."

Fraiser had been watching this exchange with interest, but she had a feeling that it was going to be a long discussion. She cleared her throat. "Colonel, Daniel, look." She glanced at her watch, then the wall clock. Both timepieces agreed that it was a different day than when she had started out. After she had their attention, Janet continued. "It's after midnight. Cassie's got school in the morning and Sam and I are going in to work." She stood up. "You two need to sort through this, but I'm not really a part of this equation. So I'm going home. Just do me a favor, and...talk this out. Daniel, you're running out of new body areas to bruise, honey; be more careful. If you need me, call me, okay?"

Jack arose from the table and gave the woman a warm hug. "Thanks, Doc...for everything."

"Colonel, just remember...I'm a doctor first, your friend second and a Major third. If I can help I will. I`ll lock the front door on the way out." She went into the living room, "Come on, girls. The bus is leaving."

*****

After another chorus of good nights, the two men found themselves alone again. Daniel looked exhausted from his newest round of excitement and O'Neill offered him his hand.

"C'mon, let's put this to bed for the night."

Daniel nodded. "I think Janet drugged my wine."

"I think you're just tired." He slipped a supporting arm around the younger man's chest and lifted him from the chair to his own feet. He shifted holds and led him towards the bedroom hallway. They came to the master room, Jack glanced down at the almost sleepwalker and turned in. He wasn't going to lose track of him again. He sat Daniel down on the bed and helped him remove his still damp clothing, then turned the bed down and settled him under the comforter. Jack went around to the other side, stripped off his own clothes, turned off the lights, and climbed into bed next to the chilled body. He spooned up next to Daniel and carefully slid his arm around the battered torso.

Daniel shifted, seeking more heat and comfort. "I'm sorry."

Jack adjusted his hold, trying to reach more of the chilled skin. "I love you, Daniel. Whatever you need, just take. We'll worry about the rest of it...later." He was rewarded with the soft regular breathing of a sleeping Daniel Jackson in his arms.

*****

The following day dawned sunny and warm and presented Jack O'Neill with an opportunity to look a long time at one of his new favorite celestial class bodies in the known universe.

Daniel was asleep; completely, happily, relaxed, and asleep. He was on his back, the long, light brown hair falling softly from his wide forehead, the arched eyebrows and large eyes relaxed in slumber, allowing some prematurely formed lines to smooth back into place. The high cheekbones held a slight flush, probably from a touch of fever after last night's adventures. The mobile, talented, infuriating and beloved mouth still and serene. The full lips were slightly open and there appeared to be some swelling of the bottom lip. The firm jaw was relaxed in sleep. His Daniel in His bed; he liked that idea, a lot. Now, if he could just convince Daniel that this was where he truly belonged.

Then Jack noticed something in the morning sunlight. Daniel's skin tone seemed to be more of a normal color. The striking golden tan glow that had permeated the fair skin seemed to be fading. A closer examination revealed that Daniel's hair also had darker roots than the thick mane itself. The slaver drugs that had been controlling him and attacking his system finally seem to be working they way out and allowing Danny's physiology to reestablish its more normal coloration. He blew out a breath in relief. Maybe, just maybe this nightmare would finally come to an end.

He shifted, rolling over on his side, propping his head up on his elbow. What exactly had happened yesterday that had started the ball rolling down that last awful, slippery slope? After examining all their actions, Jack could only put it to one cause: fear. It wasn't lack of love, it was Daniel's fear of himself and his fear of loss. It had also been Jack's fear of discovery by Janet Fraiser and Carter that had pushed him away from Daniel in a mistaken attempt to protect him from job related consequences. All things considered, he was more than a little ashamed of himself for ever thinking that either woman would ever want to do anything but protect a hurt Danny. As long as they knew he would do what was best, they would support him. Of course, he also knew that the minute Jack O'Neill tried `anything' funny, they'd be on him like furies. And if there were ever two people that he was be afraid of, it was them!

As O'Neill lay there thinking, the eyelids and lashes that he was watching, slowly cracked open to reveal two blue irises returning his gaze. It took them a moment to focus. They closed and opened a few times before recognition began to assert itself and the brain began to engage. But finally and inevitably, it did. Jack smiled at him. "Hey, sleepyhead."

The beautiful mouth licked its lips and tried to enunciate something but it came out a groan. Then some painfully expressed words evolved. "Oh, god."

"Nope, just me." Jack slid over closer and propped his chin on his doubled fists, staring at Daniel.

"Oh, shit. I hurt."

"Well, that burst my bubble. The most beautiful sight in my world and the first thing out of his mouth is a blasphemy and the second is an obscenity." Jack looked on him with compassion. "I bet you hurt. You did fall off the roof last night."

"I was afraid you'd say that; I was hoping it was a dream."

"No, sorry, your reality and my nightmare." Jack shook his head. "I'm sorry, love. Can I do anything for you?"

"Can you go pee for me?"

"No."

"Can you help me get up?"

"Yea, that I can do." Jack rolled off the bed and went around to Daniel's side. He sat down facing the suffering man and grasped both his forearms, pulling him to a sitting position. Jack then slid around to Daniel's back and carefully wrapped his arms around Daniel's chest and stood up with him. "You okay?" He asked concernedly.

"Um-hum." The reply came through gritted teeth.

Jack kissed him on the nape of the neck. "Sorry."

"You're not the idiot that fell off the roof, Jack."

"I know, but you're my favorite idiot. and I don't like to see you in pain." He replied consolingly.

Daniel leaned his head back on Jack's shoulder. "Thank you."

He kissed the ear. "You're welcome." He moved down the neck. "You are so stiff and tight, and not in the right places at all. C'mon." Jack guided the younger man into the bathroom.

"Jack, I can manage this by myself."

O'Neill shifted this hold slightly. "Probably, but humor me, okay, it makes me feel useful. I'll handle the standing and walking; you take care of everything else."

A few minutes later, Jack eased him back into the bed. The phone rang, and he picked up the phone on the bed stand. "O'Neill."

"Colonel? It's Fraiser."

"Hi Doc. What's up." He sat down next to Daniel and stroked his bare chest. Daniel made a face at him.

"How's the patient?"

"Definitely not up." O'Neill answered. "He's having a hard time getting out of bed."

"I'm not surprised." She continued. "Look, Colonel. I'm taking a half-day today. I'd like to drop off some meds for Daniel if you're going to be home."

"Sure, great." He nodded at Daniel and smiled. "I'm sure he'd appreciate the pain meds. Yea, see you shortly." He hung up the phone. "Doc's going to drop something off for you."

Daniel didn't answer, he was asleep.

*****

Noon and the doorbell rang. O'Neill opened the door to Janet Fraiser with a pizza box in one hand and a brown paper bag in the other. He stepped back and allowed her free passage, snagging the pizza. She glanced around the living room. Jack shrugged.

"Still in bed."

"I'm not surprised." She continued on into the kitchen and put her purse and bag on the counter. She took the fresh bottle of wine out of the bag and then unloaded several small pill bottles. "Now, he can have one or the other, or a little of both. But not a lot of either, okay?"

"Okay, what's what?"

"Tylenol, a muscle relaxer and a mild blood thinner to prevent blood clots. He's got a lot of bruises and I'm a little concerned about that."

Jack nodded. He was too. "Doc, how about the whirlpool?"

"Whirlpool?"

He shrugged. "The tub in the main bathroom." At her raised eyebrows, he continued. "Hey, I'm a well-paid Colonel with nobody to spend money on except my own comfort and my team." He explained honestly. "And I seem to get banged around as much as the younger ones do."

Fraiser looked at him critically. "How's the eye?" She asked as they sat down to the Pizza.

Jack grimaced. "Not bad, I don't even notice it unless I look in a mirror.

She shook her head at him as they each took a piece of their lunch. "Do you want to get Daniel?"

"Nah, I don't think he could eat it. He bit his tongue and lip last night in the fall. He's not chewing too well today either."

Janet cringed. "Poor Daniel. I can't even begin to imagine what he's feeling." She watched Jack, who shook his head.

"I can, and I just want this whole thing to go away...so we can get back to normal around here."

She smiled at him. "Do you think it ever will, get back to normal I mean?"

He smiled back. "Well, at least for what passes for normal here." He took another bite of the pizza. "I'd like you to check something for me."

"Certainly. What?"

"This morning, I noticed he was changing color." At her confused look, he explained more. "That gold tone he's been sporting since we got him back, it's fading. He's beginning to look, well, more human. And his hair is growing back brown again." He looked happily at her. "The drugs are finally beginning to leave his system...or at least it looks that way to me."

She nodded. "That's the key right there. When they do clear his system, you'll have the old Daniel back on your hands."

"Thank god for that."

She looked up at him. "Are you sure?"

"What?" O'Neill looked at her. "What's that supposed to mean? Of course I want him back the way he was. Why wouldn't I?"

Janet took a deep breath. "Colonel..."

He shook his head at her, having a good idea where this was going to go. "If you're gonna talk to me like I think you are, you'd better call me Jack."

"Okay, Jack." She pursed her lips then began. "You know the drugs are what's making him so...emotional." She accepted his nod. "I'm just afraid that when he recovers that..."

"He won't need me as much?" Jack looked at her and smiled. "Look, Doc...er, Janet. I guess you could say that Daniel and I have always had an unusual friendship. We understand each other on different levels for different reasons, I've never tried to define it, I'm just satisfied that it's there. And oh, yea. We fight and fuss. I've learned in my long life that the line between love and hate is easy to cross and it moves once and awhile. But if you stay there long enough with your toes on it...it'll come back. Maybe in a different way or form, but back none the less." He looked at her. "I told Danny when this started that I was here for him and to take what he needed. That's what's happening now. He's still taking...but that's okay. Later on, well, we'll worry about that later."

Janet looked at the man sitting in front of her with amazement. "That's the most unselfish thing I've ever heard."

"Not really." He continued on. "Because I'm selfish enough not to ever leave that `line' because if you leave the line, you've lost the battle and everything you've ever fought for. I left it once, but not again. I'm here for the war's duration."

She smiled. "Okay, I'll change it to the bravest man I ever knew."

"Nah, there's one braver, Jan. And he's probably getting hungry about now." He tilted his head, "So you want to check on him? I'll make him some soup."

******

Doctor Fraiser finished her exam of Daniel and put her medical instruments back in her carry bag. She looked happily at her patient. "Other than the fact, you are bruised beyond belief, young man, I'd say you were on the mend. I've left some meds with Jack to help take the worst of the pain off, but mainly you need to rest and eat. And since you have the convenience of a whirlpool tub, use it and let mother nature take its course."

Daniel nodded from his bed. "Thanks for everything, Jan. I'm sorry to be such a bother."

"It just gives me a reason to stop by and visit you." She looked at him a moment and then reached over and gave him a motherly kiss on the cheek. "And I can't do this in my infirmary."She was rewarded by a blush and a smile. Janet stood up, picked up her bag and went down into the living room area where she knew the Colonel would be waiting.

Sure enough, he stood up from the couch and met her. "How's he doing?"

"Good, but it'll be a few days before he gets comfortable again." She nodded her satisfaction to him. "Just keep feeding him up and I'd say twice a day in the tub will help a lot. Follow the instructions on the med's bottles but if he doesn't need the Tylenol or the muscle relaxers don't use them, okay. The goal is to get 'all' drugs out of his system."

Jack nodded. "Gotcha." He glanced up the short flight of stairs towards Daniel's location.

She followed his gaze. "I'll let myself out. You go get him into the tub. He'll feel better for it." As she walked off she called back. "Call me if you need me." There was no answer. They didn't need her now...of that she was sure.

Chap 8

An hour later, the two men were sharing the large whirlpool bath. Jack was leaning against the back of the tub and Daniel was sitting between his legs enjoying the soft gentle back massage of a terry wash cloth and antibacterial soap while the tub's water flowed over around and between them.

"How you doing?" Jack asked his partner. Daniel had been relatively quiet in the tub after an initial reaction about how good it all felt.

"Fine, great, wonderful, marvelous, fantastic, excellent, cool, groovy..."

"Groovy?"

Danny slid his hands up the legs that surrounded him in the water. "Groovy: in the groove, slick, warm..." He encountered an obstacle in the water behind him. "And interested...definitely interested in peaceful exploration."

Jack chuckled, slipping his arms around his lover's body and kissing him on the nape of the neck. "It's the Tylenol, Danny. You only think your interested cause you don't hurt this minute." He caressed the flat belly and soft genitals. "You would absolutely regret it in the morning."

"But I'd extremely enjoy it right now." He continued his study of water hazards with questing fingers. "Come on, Jack." He shifted back to put pressure on the firm object of his desire. "You know you want to..."

"Daniel...stop it...be good, for crying out loud. A man can only take so much. Stop it!"

"But that's just the point. I want it, and you want to take it."

"Yea, well, you can't have it...yet! Now stop! Let's pretend you have some common sense shall we?" O'Neill gave up and grabbed the teasing hands in his and forced them back around to Daniel's front. He held them with one hand and used his other to fondle his lover. "The playground is closed until all equipment is in proper working order. This is not open for business yet, so cease and desist. Please." Daniel sat quiet in his arms. "Please?"

"Not fair."

"No doubt in my mind..." Jack rested his chin on his lover's shoulder. "But if something were to happen...I would not be a safe person. Fraiser and Carter, Hell the entire SGC would hunt me down and shoot me like the dog I would be." He hugged the man to him. "Save it for later."

Daniel slumped back into his arms. Jack kissed his neck and Daniel tried to turn to face him. He groaned as the bruised muscles objected.

"See." Jack fussed. "Relax, enjoy the bath."

"I'm all pruny."

O'Neill rolled his eyes and pushed Daniel forward. "That's it. The Daniel-Jackson-pick-on-Jack-marathon is over." He stood up in the tub and grasped the younger man under his arms and pulled him to his feet. "You are going to take your pills and go to bed; I am going to veg out on the couch and drink beer." He grabbed a towel and guided Daniel into the hallway. The younger man acquiesced quietly and allowed it. When they got to the bedroom, Jack gently supported his friend as he lay down on the bed. Then he sat down next to him. Daniel looked up at him with suspiciously glistening eyes. Jack kissed him on the mouth and he flinched. "See." The older man chided him gently. "Even your lips hurt. Come on, Danny. Give yourself a rest."

"Jack...I'm...afraid."

"Of...?"

"I don't know. I'm just..."

He gave it up and lay down next to Daniel, cuddling the man next to his chest. "What are you afraid of?"

"I'm afraid of losing you. I'm afraid that this has made me... different...to you."

"Do you feel different?"

"In a way. Before...well, I wasn't inexperienced. But now I just feel like..."

"Whoa, Danny-boy. Stop it." Jack grasped his jaw and kissed him full on the mouth. "You do know what's going on, right?" No reply. "Listen to me..." He still had hold of Daniel's face. "Janet said it just an hour ago. Daniel, the drugs are wearing off now. For three weeks you've been living in a nightmare. Now, things are beginning to change again. Look, the chemicals in your body are finally going away. Your skin color, your hair, is changing back to normal, but your emotions are fried again because of it and that marvelous brain of yours is in panic mode." Jack released his grip and stroked the cheek to soothe the red marks caused by his fingers. "In another week or so, we'll ask this question again, but for right now...what do you want from me?"

"I want you to make love to me, Jack." Daniel looked longingly at him. "I just want you."

"Okay, fair enough, you talked me into it." He kissed Daniel again, gently this time. "I will be pleased to do that. But, it'll be my rules this time, not because I don't want to have it all, but because you're not ready, and I can`t bear to hurt you." Daniel opened his mouth to protest. Jack kissed it closed. "Uh-uh. No arguing...no fussing...only loving and only gently."

O'Neill stretched his long form over his lover, lying as lightly as he could on the tense body. He started kissing the wonderful eyes, taking the tears with him as he left. The soft mouth, tasting the metallic flavor of blood from the split lip. The graceful neck, knowing the saltiness of perspiration. The still-lean chest, knowing the smell of his lover. The flat belly, feeling the strength of the man. Then the wonderful smell of musk and the taste of the flesh as he slipped the flaccid penis in his mouth.

He could see Daniel watching him out of the corner of his eye. While Jack wasn't terribly experienced at this either, he knew what worked and what he himself liked. He figured he could learn any flourishes as he went along. He mouthed the soft organ, suckling gently. Using his tongue, he pleasured it as his fingers stroked the downy thighs and soft skin of the testicles, rolling them gently, then behind to stroke the sensitive area there.

Daniel could only stare at the unbelievable sight of Jack going down on him and then to gasp and arch into his lover's mouth. "God, oh, Jack." He whispered. The strong hands rode up his outer thighs to stroke back down his belly to his groin. Daniel arced into paradise; he rode a hazy, radiant crest to the top of his world. Then, from nowhere, he became hard...he was on fire...his spine, his muscles, his groin, his mind exploded and Daniel screamed a wordless scream of triumph. Then, he slipped away.

When his lover-mate began to respond to him, Jack was thrilled. This might actually be the turning point and, oh, how he wanted it to be good for Danny. He felt the power his touch had for Daniel and how he could use it to heal this man he loved.

Too soon, too quick, too fast Daniel came and cried out his pleasure in Jack's arms. The still frail body shook like a ship in heavy seas, battered from within, bucking against him and then slumped bonelessly on to the bed. Jack released his love, pulled himself up next to him and cradled him with his arms. "Daniel." There was no answer. "Daniel?" He took his lover's unresponsive head on his arm, cradling it with his other hand. "Danny.... Danny...no, oh god, no." O'Neill pulled his beloved's face to his chest, rocking him like a small child and wept over the still form he held, stroking the beautiful, pale, wan features and damned himself to the two most heinous of hells; the ones called Guilt and Regret.

*******

Daniel regained consciousness slowly. He was confused. There was a rocking motion that was unfamiliar, and a noise he couldn't recognize. But he felt fine, wonderful, and reborn again. Only the anomalous movement and sound was confusing. If he could just get free of whatever force was holding him so tightly, maybe he could stop it once and for all. He struggled weakly. Opening his eyes, looking up he could see Jack's face, but it was somehow powerfully altered, to reflecting only grief and pain. "Jaack?" He managed a whisper, not loud but enough.

"Danny?" A returned whisper of disbelief, then relief.

"Jack, let me... loose..."

"Danny?"

That was unusual...Jack was usually quicker on the uptake than this... "cant breath, J'ak. Too hard."

"Oh, god...Danny." The voice responded, the grip released him.

Position shifting, ouch, too quick. Ah, back, hurts... "Schiessen",Danny gasped out an imprecation.

"Danny?" Jack's voice, fearful. The strong hands supporting him again.

"Humm." Nice now. Comfortable and warm in Jack's arms. He opened his eyes again and discovered he was inches from Jack's concerned, tear-damp face.

"Daniel, say something...in English, maybe."

Oh, okay. He could do English. "What do you want me too...."

"Just tell me you're...alive...please..."

" I`m all right, I'm alive." He tried to soothe his upset Jack, "What happened?"

"When you...you came....you... passed out."

He`d passed out? It seemed like such a silly thing to do. "Sorry, rude." Daniel began to giggle, much to Jack`s dismay.

"I though you had a heart attack! or a stroke!..." Jack was holding him on his lap, cuddling him against his chest. Daniel raised his face to him and kissed Jack's chin. It had stubble on it and it tasted salty. It tasted like tears, it was tears. Jack had been crying, not crying now; but the tears were still fresh and damp.

"No, no," Daniel managed to enunciate clearly, this time. "No, wonderful, like...flying....so wonderful."

Jack kissed the mouth with the blood on it's lips. "Your mouth's bleeding, you...you stopped, you passed out. I thought I'd killed you. Janet said...."

Daniel explored his bottom lip with his tongue. "Split lip bleeding, thas all. Kiss it, make it better?" he pleaded.

Jack shook his head and bent over, leaning his forehead against Daniel's. "You're okay? You`re sure you`re okay?" His voice was still shaking.

Daniel frowned at him. "Okay." He stroked Jack's worried face. "I'm okay, I love you, so fantastic."

"Do you know what happened? Do you remember what..."

He was able to smile, oh yea...he remembered that. "You...loved... me." He replied with awe. "You...you...loved me with your mouth...oh, Jack...I've never..." He stopped and took a breath. "I've never felt...like that...god!"

"Yea, well, me neither...You passed out, scared the shit out of me."

"Why? It was wonderful." He kissed Jack, tracing his fingers over the beloved features. "Can we do it again?"

"No!"

******

That evening, after a meal and a solo whirlpool bath for Daniel, the two lovers settled comfortably into the king sized bed. Jack was reading a report that he'd brought home several days earlier when life was supposed to have been much easier than it had become in the last three. Daniel was leaning back against Jack, comfortably propped up with several pillows and was watching an old movie, The Egyptian, on the television.

Jack made it through the wormhole and into the village as outlined by Lieutenant Colonel Bannon of SG5, when he felt something tickle his hip. He ignored the provocation on general principals and continued to read the report. Daniel continued to lie quietly next to him, watching the Egyptian physician Sinuah practice medicine and court intrigue in Akenaten's palace. The tickling of Jack would occur at odd moments during the movie and commercials. After finishing the document and noting his comments to be attached later, Jack rolled over next to Daniel, wrapped an arm around the younger man and pressed his free hand on his lover's chest, feeling for the steady throb of Daniel's heart.

Slightly amused, Daniel looked up at him. "You know, it is still beating, I'm fine. I just passed out."

"I've never seen anyone do that, Danny." Jack looked at him with concern. "Have you ever done that before?"

"I don`t think so." He looked up at Jack's concerned eyes. "but I've never... Jack, that...what happened was so... amazing, so overwhelming."

"You can say that again." Jack shook his head. "It must be the drugs in your system."

Daniel looked up at him. "Why? Why must it be the drugs? You said yourself I'm getting back to normal." He smiled up at Jack. "Maybe it's just us, what you do to me."

"Sara never passed out."

Daniel struggled to sit up. The bruised muscles in his back objecting. Jack slipped a hand under him, giving him support. Finally, when he could face his lover on an even plane, Daniel turned. "Maybe...I don't know, she just didn't. Maybe, we just have a better connection." He leaned into Jack. "In french, they call it..."

"Yea, yea, la petite morte, I know Daniel. I'm not an idiot here. I know what orgasms are and what they feel like...even in France. The older man shook his head. "Danny, I can't take much more. Please...if something happened to you...especially now..."

Daniel stared at his lover in confusion. "Jack..."

"Jack shit! Danny..." O'Neill shook his head and reached for his lover. He slipped his hand behind Daniel`s neck and held him. "Janet has been warning me and telling me it's too soon and I just keep on letting you talk me into things."

"Jack?"

I shouldn't even be on the same team with you now, much less your leader. I can't control you, I can't command you and I sure as hell can't lose you."

"You never could control me, I let you command me and you'll never lose me." He leaned forward into Jack's supportive arms with a kiss. "And I'll only follow you, so it's the only way it can be."

"You do know that this is not going to make a bit of difference?"

Innocent blue eyes turned on him. "What?"

"The tickling thing."

"Tickling?"

"Yes. Tickling is very low on my eroticism level right now." He gazed into his lover's sweet, warm expression for a moment then gently leaned over into a kiss, their lips grazing against each others before their tongues met.

Daniel literally melted against him, slipping arms around Jack's firm strong chest. He loved kissing Jack. He loved being kissed by Jack. He opened his mouth and teased Jack farther in, to duel tongues, to taste him, to breathe him. "How's that on your eroticism level?" He murmured."

"You are so not fighting fair." Jack pulled back and looked at his lover.

Daniel chuckled. "All's fair in love and war, Jack."

Jack pushed Daniel down into the pillows. "Right. So here's where I stop this before it gets out of hand...again." He placed a gentle hand over Daniel's mouth. "No. Not now, save it for later." The blue eyes narrowed. Jack shook his head. "No, later, much later" Finally, a sigh, exhaled through the nostrils. Jack released him and rolled over to lay back on his pillows. Daniel snuggled up under his arm and lay his head on Jack's shoulder.

Jack looked down at him. "You know, Doc says that this is all due to a drug induced chemical imbalance and when your system gets back to normal, you won't need me anymore."

Daniel lay a hand on his flat belly and swirled his fingers through the soft, curly hair below Jack's navel. "She's wrong."

"Maybe, maybe not. It's still up to you, Daniel." Jack looked at him. Daniel needed him, he knew. Right now, Daniel really needed him. The old Jack O'Neill of three years ago was gone, lost in a tumble of sand dunes and kids with M-16s in their hands. The newer, cleaner version was here. And if that was who and what Daniel wanted and needed he could have him. He could have him for as long as the drugs made Daniel want him, as long as their feelings lasted for each other, as long as their lives were intertwined, as long as the SGC existed, as long the sun rose in the morning. O'Neill surrendered.

***********************

EPILOGUE

Teal'c had returned that morning from his visit with his son, Ryac in the Land of Light. He headed for O'Neill's office to check in and to see how Danieljackson fared in his recovery. Teal'c found the two men in O'Neill's office. The Colonel was seated behind his desk, the younger civilian was sitting on O'Neill's desk facing him. When the door opened they turned to see the Jaffa warrior enter.

"Teal'c, welcome back." Jackson greeted his friend with enthusiasm, leaping off the desk to come to the big man. He shook his hand, then clasped the large man`s upper arm with a firm grip. "How's Ryac?"

"Thank you, Danieljackson. Ryac grows tall and strong." He looked at his friend in concern then looked at O'Neill. The Colonel was seated at his desk, smiling, waiting for the Archeologist and the Jaffa to finish exchanging greetings. "How fare you?"

"Good," the young man nodded affably. "Ready to get back to work." He smiled at Teal'c then back over his shoulder at O'Neill.

Teal'c looked at his friend in concern. Daniel still appeared underweight and pale, but his voice and attitude were both strong. However, something about the young man had changed. He identified it almost immediately. "It is good to see you recovering from your trials, Danieljackson. I too look forward to returning to our duty."

"Well, I've got things sitting on my desk and I know Jack will want to brief you on our next mission." Daniel started towards the door. "Shall we have dinner together? I'll call Sam if you want?"

O'Neill nodded. "That would be great, Danny. Teal'c?"

"It would be good to eat the evening meal with my teammates. Thank you. I will see you then, Danieljackson."

As the office door closed behind the young man, Teal'c crossed to the Colonel's desk. "You did not wait long, O'Neill."

"What? Wait long for what, T?" Jack looked at him curiously.

"To claim Danieljackson as your own." The big man looked at O'Neill disapprovingly. "You should have given him more time to assimilate his experiences."

Jack O'Neill was shocked at Teal's comments. "Wait a minute" He stood up and came around the desk. "I didn't `claim' anything of Danny. What happened was mutual." He looked at the warrior in surprise. "You don't think that I forced him, do you?"

Teal'c looked at his team leader and friend for a long space of time with searching eyes. "No, O'Neill, I do not believe that. You care too much for Danieljackson to ever do that."

"Damn right!" O'Neill raised his right hand with it's index finger pointing up. He opened his mouth to say something, when Daniel reentered the room.

"What's going on guys?' He looked from one man to the other curiously. "Jack, Teal'c? Is there a problem?"

Jack dropped his hand and looked at Daniel, his expression softening. "No, Danny." He replied in a soft voice. "No problem." He looked at his other friend, Teal'c.

Teal'c's sharp eyes went from one man to the other. He saw the happiness and openness in Danieljackson's eyes and he saw the care in O'Neill's. No, there was no coercion there. Only deep emotions. He nodded, satisfied. "No, my friend." He responded to the young scientist's question. "There is no problem."

"Well, uh," Jackson looked from one man to the other. "What time is good for dinner? So I can tell Sam."

O'Neill looked at the warrior with curiosity and concern. "Six o'clock is good for me. Teal'c?"

"It is good for me, also." The warrior nodded slowly, looking at O'Neill "I am satisfied. It is a good thing."

Daniel glanced back between the two men, frowning slightly. He'd missed something, he knew he had. He'd have to get Jack to explain it to him tonight, after they returned home together.

Jack O'Neill smiled as his Danny looked at him in confusion and then turned and left to pass the message on to their teammember. He then looked at Teal'c. "How did you know?"

"It is obvious to those who know you." Teal'c nodded knowingly. "The warrior bond is not lightly taken in my culture."

"It's not in ours either." O'Neill nodded. "In fact, it's not supposed to be taken at all, my friend. This type of relationship is forbidden in our military." He sighed, "But, I can't do anything else."

Teal'c looked in confusion to O'Neill, "It is obvious that Danieljackson is happy and that you are the reason for his feelings. How can this not be a positive thing?"

Jack only shook his head. "Just don't mention it to anyone, okay." Jack looked up at the big man.

"It is not anyone's concern. I will protect your privacy, as you protect Danieljackson."

"Thank you my friend." The two warriors locked eyes, Teal'c nodded and O'Neill smiled at his friend, relieved that Teal'c understood. "Now I know he's really safe."

The warrior bowed his head. "As he should be, O'Neill. As we will keep him."

Finish.

A meridian is only an imaginary line on a stupid map. De Nile doesn't have one.