Legal Disclaimer: I own nothing but the original characters. Paramount owns Star Trek.

Chapel trailed McCoy lackadaisically towards Sickbay. Under the combined influences of the Arcturian fizzes and Mudd's invisibility potion, she was experiencing one of the oddest highs she'd ever had. The incident in Kirk's cabin had made her uncomfortably aware of her heightened senses--she looked around the familiar corridors with new interest. The colored doors and walls, which she'd considered a bit tacky to begin with, now shimmered with vibrancy. Every movement caught her eye, every sound made her turn and almost stumble as she struggled to maintain a safe distance from McCoy. She could smell the Kentucky bourbon on him as plainly as if he were holding a bottle under her nose.

From her standpoint in the back, Chapel was beginning to develop a totally new appreciation of Doctor Leonard McCoy. Maybe it was the invisibility potion; maybe it was the six Arcturian fizzes she'd never quite gotten out of her system. But from this vantage point it became quite apparent to the nurse that Dr. McCoy had a very attractive tush.

Chapel stifled a giggle at the thought as she ducked into the turbo after McCoy. It was definitely the Arcturian fizzes. Leonard McCoy was a dear man--but staring at his rear? She swallowed down another giggle. It's like lusting after your uncle.

"Officers' quarters," McCoy drawled as the turbo paused for his command.

At his order, a flicker of panic sparked in Chapel's stomach. They were supposed to be going to Sickbay. As the lift began its steady ascent, though, the nurse relaxed. After all, this might be better. You'll go there, get him at the right moment, and confess your sins in the privacy of his cabin rather than in front of half a dozen people you're going to have to face every day. Let's see...`Dr. McCoy, I have the funniest thing to tell you...' No, that's no good. How 'bout, `Ya know, Leonard, life is really crazy sometimes...' Chapel leaned quietly against the wall of the turbo. Yeah, right. You show up in his cabin naked and invisible and try to use interaction skills on the man. Smooth, Chris. Once you peel him off the ceiling, he's gonna be really receptive to your humor.

The turbo door slid open, and Chapel followed McCoy out into the hall. She had never realized how chilly the damn ship was. Then again, she'd rarely been out of her cabin in this condition. The nurse hugged herself as she slid past the sensors, just brushing against McCoy as she entered his cabin.

The doctor stiffened. Chapel could almost swear she saw the hair on his neck stand straight on end. "Who's there?" he asked quickly, darting his hazy blue eyes around the room. Chapel held her breath until he nodded his head suspiciously and relaxed. "Last time I go to some stupid college bar..." he muttered to himself as he began pulling off his shirt. "Cheap liquor and smart women. What kinda shore leave is that?"

Chapel felt a tug of horror in her gut as McCoy began undressing. She knew she'd have to talk quickly before he got either too sleepy or too grumpy or too naked to be of use to her, but her voice was like a giant glob of peanut butter stuck in her throat. As the black undershirt followed his civilian dress shirt, the nurse felt her throat constricting even more. Brother-figure or no, McCoy was definitely an attractive man, and those damn Arcturian fizzes were wreaking havoc with her hormones. Leonard, before you go any further...Doctor, I have something to...Stop taking off your clothes for gods' sake and... Just as he began unfastening the catch of his trousers, a summons from Communications saved the day.

"Incoming communications from the Versailles, Doctor," the night shift communications officer chirped, absolutely too chipper and too sober for his own damn good, in Chapel's opinion.

McCoy smiled gregariously and flopped down onto the bunk. "Why, that's right nice of you to send it on up, son. Relay that message onto my screen."

"It's on a secure channel, sir. I'll need your identity code."

Chapel rolled her eyes. Officious little bastard, she thought to herself. You know it's McCoy, I know it's McCoy, just pipe the damn thing in. I'm getting cold.

McCoy scrunched up his face momentarily. "My identity code, my identity..." His face wrinkled up in a cross between inebriated amusement and chagrin. "Why, son, I don't rightly know my identity code. Would it be in the officers' manual? I can look it up if you--"

The twirp at communications obviously thought better of his nitpicking and said, "That's okay, Doctor. I'll just pipe it on through." Chapel made a mental note to take extra long on the man's next routine physical, and to make sure that the instruments were extra cold.

A feminine face flickered onto McCoy's comm screen, and Chapel groaned inwardly. Tonia Barrow. The nurse folded her arms across her chest and leaned against the dresser. Chapel made it her business to stay out of McCoy's personal business, and she would never presume to tell him who to date. But on the Moh's Scale of Hussies, Tonia Barrow was just short of diamond level.

"Tonia!" McCoy, on the other hand, obviously thought otherwise. A huge grin widened his face, and his eyes took on an even brighter sparkle. "Why didn't you tell me you were in town?"

Barrow returned his grin. "We just established orbit, Leonard. Quick layover for supplies before we ship out for the Gamma Epsilon system." A look of flirtatious disappointment flickered across her features. "Not enough time for a proper shore leave, I'm afraid, Poopsie."

Poopsie?? Chapel caught the edge of the dresser for support. I think I'm going to be ill.

"Well, that's a real shame, darlin'," McCoy said slowly. "It's been too long." He leaned casually against the pillows on one elbow. "I'd think a second officer would be able to finagle an hour or two...that is, if she wanted it bad enough."

"Sorry, Leonard. It took all the finagling I had to get this hook-up." Barrow's expression took on a cat-like air. "But I intend to make it worth your while."

McCoy's eyes crinkled in amusement. "And just what did you have in mind, my dear?"

Chapel stifled a yawn. Would you two just get on with it already?

The transmission's picture zoomed outward to allow a full view of her body. The second officer of the Versailles was clad only in a skimpy black lace teddy, fishnet stockings and five-inch stiletto heels. She leaned forward onto one hand, revealing an expanse of ample cleavage to McCoy's eyes. "What did you think I had in mind, Killer?" she cooed.

The nurse's eyes rolled backwards in her head. The woman was one big, giant, walking cliche. McCoy would never fall for such an unimaginative, tacky display of...

The drool was just forming on the corner of McCoy's lips as he nodded, bug-eyed, to Barrow. His voice was a full half-octave higher and his drawl even more pronounced as he choked out, "Tonia, darling, are you sure...I mean, is this channel safe?"

Barrow grinned seductively. "Now, we can't really be sure of that, can we?"

"But...but, what if someone--"

"That's what makes it all the more thrilling, Leonard." She eased down on the other hand as the view widened. Barrow had gone down on all fours on her bunk, her body flexing like a Siamese cat during a particularly good stretch. "And you are definitely a thrilling man, Leonard McCoy," she purred, her lips puckering together into a full red pout. "I want to do so many things to you...nasty things," she added in a secretively seductive tone.

Chapel leaned onto one elbow on the dresser, her face in her hand. Yup, Tonia Barrow was definitely a diamond on the Hussy scale. The nurse watched in amazement as McCoy ate it up, loosening his trousers with one hand as his eyes greedily drank in Barrow's every move. As the scantily clad woman continued her steamy monologue, McCoy's hand drifted to his stiff cock, gripping and stroking the long shaft.

"Oooh, I want to fuck you, baby," Barrow continued to croon into the screen. "I wanna fuck you long and hard."

Now, that was an original line, Chapel thought uncharitably in the direction of Barrow.

"You're so big and hard," Barrow sighed, her contrived speech punctuated by girlish squeaks and moans. "I want you so bad."

That's it. I'm getting bored, now. Chapel waited more or less patiently as McCoy's rhythmic pumping grew faster and harder. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oooh, baby, oh, baby, fuck me hard, fuck me long. Just get on with it.

Barrow's eyes were glistening as she leaned forward onto her elbows, the black spaghetti strap of her teddy falling over her shoulders. Her moans grew longer and louder as she watched McCoy speed towards climax. "Oh, yes! Oh, yes, Daddy, come on home!" she cried out in rapture as McCoy's pelvis began convulsing. The doctor groaned with pleasure as the orgasm racked his body. Barrow moaned and screamed from across the channel, an orgasm--authentic or artificial, Chapel couldn't tell--sending her body into violent spasms.

As the excitement died down, Barrow rose back onto her elbows, her face flush with exertion. "Oh, baby, you were so good. Baby?" Her eyes narrowed into dark slits. "Leonard?" But McCoy was sound asleep, snoring loudly on the bunk. Barrow shook her head, then sighed. "Good talking to you, dear. Sleep well." And she ended the transmission.

Chapel stared at the blank screen for a moment, then down at the unconscious doctor. Well, thanks a whole hell of a lot, Tonia. The nurse leaned over McCoy's shoulder, tapping lightly. "Doctor?" she whispered. McCoy groaned and rolled over onto his side. Chapel tried harder, giving his shoulder a little shake with her hand. "Doctor McCoy?"

McCoy grabbed the hand, still sleeping, and cuddled it to his chest, almost throwing Chapel off-balance in the process. He mumbled something about `sweet baby' and chocolate sauce and went back to his snoring.

Chapel sighed, carefully extricating her hand from his grip. "Oh, great," she muttered quietly. "Now what the hell am I supposed to do?" Even under the influence of troffe and invisibility potion, the nurse in her knew that McCoy would be out for hours, and would be in no condition when he woke up to deal with an invisible head nurse. A small smile touched Chapel's lips as she pulled the covers over McCoy. "Guess I'm going to have to brave Sickbay," she murmured, planting an impulsive peck on his forehead.

As she headed for the door, a thought occurred to Chapel. She spun on her heels, turning to the synthesizer on the far wall. Quickly punching in her security code, she made an order. Two detox tablets appeared on the little stand before her, and she scooped them up to place on the bedside next to the sleeping doctor. McCoy was going to have one hell of a hangover the next morning. Something told Chapel she was going to have trouble enough dealing with her own to deal with his.

The doors of McCoy's cabin slid open before her. Chapel looked cautiously out into the hall to make sure the coast was clear. Although the immediate hallway was clear, a small group of ensigns were loitering around the turbolift. Well, that option is out. Better think of another way to Sickbay, Chris. Following her nose, she walked down the hall until a familiar laugh caught her attention.

Arex! Chapel followed the laugh until it was just behind a closed door. Misjudging, she stepped too close. The sensors registered her body readings and opened it for her. Oops. From the sound in the gym, however, Chapel needn't have worried. Arex and Patterson were a bit preoccupied.

"POINT!" The ball whizzed against the back wall, stopping harmlessly in the null grav field. Lucy Patterson bent over at the waist, her hands hanging lifelessly by her ankles as she struggled to catch her breath. "My game."

"Best two out of three," Arex panted, hefting a second ball into the air before pounding it with a grunt towards the far wall.

"When are you going to face the fact that I've got you outmatched?" The ball whizzed past the diminutive woman, who spun around just in time to slam it back. "Even with three arms and three legs, you can't beat me!"

"For that, you will suffer...umph," Arex hurled himself past Patterson in a last ditch effort. The ball just barely caught the reversed gravity field of his wrist band and spun wildly out of control, hitting Chapel square in the shoulder.

Ow, ow, ow, ow. Chapel bit her lip to avoid yelping aloud as Arex and Patterson stared blankly at the ball.

"Did you see that?" Patterson blinked hard as she leaned over to pick up the ball, only narrowly missing Chapel, who spun out of reach at the last moment. "It just stopped mid-air." She turned to Arex. "That ball was nowhere near the null-grav field."

"Must have been a gravitational flux or something," Arex paused for a moment as he caught his breath. "My point."

"What?" Patterson waved her arm wildly, coming so close to the nurse that she had to spin out of her path. "That ball was out of bounds by ten parsecs."

"It was in."

"Not fair. It hit some freak gravity flux and dropped like a potato. Re-serve."

"The play stands."

Patterson was chin to chin with Arex now, the ball gripped tightly in her fist. Granted, Arex would never make a professional basketball player; but even so, the top of Patterson's head only reached nose level. "Listen, buddy. I don't care if you cheat at golf. I can look the other way when you overstep at ching'sai." The ball dropped with a thud at her side as the corners of her lips curved upwards. She twisted her fingers in the front of Arex's exercise tunic to pull him down to her. "But when you make a rotten call at z-ball, that's when I get mean, mister."

Arex smiled with mock offense. "I do not cheat at golf."

Chapel's eyes bugged out as Patterson ran her fingers along the front of Arex's tunic, opening the hidden seam as she did.

"Yes, you do cheat. I've seen you nudge the ball half a dozen times." She had worked his tunic open now and was pulling it out of his trousers. "Just because I only have two legs doesn't mean I'm stupid."

Arex looked nervously to the door as the young woman wriggled closer against him. "Lucy, do you really think..."

Oh, my goodness gracious. Chapel forgot her throbbing shoulder as Patterson opened Arex's trousers and reached in like a kid going for the ginger snaps. Chapel had heard about shipboard romances between species, had even had her share of fantasies concerning a certain non-human science officer, but this was...different. Her eyes widened even more as Patterson pulled out Arex's meaty cock. Not that long, but... Then again, there's a lot to be said for cultural diversity. Arex's manhood was heavy and at least two inches thick. Ooh, not bad at all. Chapel felt a tingling between her legs at the thought. A rather imaginative section of her foggy mind was coming up with all sorts of creative ways to utilize a lover with three hands.

Arex, however, was not as comfortable with the situation. "Lucy, what if someone comes?"

The tiny woman smiled as she dropped to her knees. "Somebody will come. Make no mistakes about that." As she slowly began to suck his crimson cock, Arex closed his bulbous eyes. Maybe it was the different facial expressions of his people, but Chapel really couldn't tell if Arex wanted to laugh or to cry.

With a choking squeak made almost indistinguishable by his thick accent, Arex said, "Computer, lock the door."

Patterson let loose her prize long enough to shake her head. "Coward. Unlock," she commanded the computer, daring Arex to belay her order.

The navigator pulled her to her feet by her elbows, all hesitation vanishing at her insult. "I am no coward," he murmured, pulling her into a hard, punishing kiss. His third hand tugged at her uniform while the first two held her firmly in place.

Chapel, who'd been watching this with a mixture of amusement and fascination, felt her knees wobble at the sight. She'd never really gotten to know Arex that well. While she was sure he was a nice enough fellow, he'd always struck her as sort of low key--somewhat shy. Right, she thought as he pulled Patterson out of her form-fitting exercise jumper and drew her against him. We may have to revise our opinion of Mr. Arex. Once again, he claimed Patterson's mouth with his, silencing her giggles as he pushed her toward the wall.

As the couple entered the null-grav field lining two sides of the gymnasium, their movements slowed to half-speed. Chapel gaped as Arex guided Patterson, lifting her easily until she was floating hip level. She reached up for the handgrips on the wall as he positioned himself behind her, holding her thighs as he aimed his hard cock against her dark-haired vulva.

It seemed an eternity as he slid weightlessly into her and began a slow motion drive in and out of her. Chapel felt her own hand slithering down her belly again. First one, then two fingers curled their way into the long valley of her opening. She manipulated her clit slowly, dumbfounded as she stared at the floating couple. The sight of their writhing bodies, combined with the chemicals in her system, were too much for the nurse. She mirrored Patterson as the first orgasm hit her body, clouding her vision. Slumping against the door for support, she forgot that her body weight would open it...

Shit! Instead of weak-kneed with orgasm, Chapel found herself sitting on the corridor floor outside of the gymnasium. She looked quickly around to see if anyone had noticed. When her perusal turned up no onlookers, she breathed heavily. Arex and Patterson had probably not even noticed. The nurse sighed to herself, Who'd have thunk it? This ship is a regular Peyton Place of torrid romance and intrigue.

Stumbling to her feet, she stretched, her shoulders and back stiff from the fall and from frustration. All right, Nurse. To Sickbay with you, she ordered silently. Chapel headed for the nearest turbolift and was about to risk entering it when M'Ress and Uhura turned a corner, headed for the same lift. Damn, so close!

The felinoid assistant communications officer paused when she neared Chapel.

"Is something wrong, M'Ress?" Uhura asked.

M'Ress wrinkled her nose, her ears twitching. The fur on her delicate face was practically standing on end. "I don't know. Therrre's something strrrange herrre..."

Chapel held her breath. Of all the people she didn't need to see, M'Ress with her cat-senses was just about at the top of the list. The invisible nurse kept absolutely still and prayed the lieutenant would just go away already.

Fortunately for Chapel, Uhura was still on leave, emotionally if not technically. "Come on, M'Ress," she laughed. "Quit stalling. You're just trying to avoid the inevitable. To the rec room. I hear a T'inga board calling your name. It's saying `M'Ress, you're going to lose.'"

M'Ress laughed her own purring laugh. "Perrrhaps," she said, stepping into the lift with one last look over her shoulders. "Perrrhaps not."

Chapel almost sighed as the lift doors closed behind them. Those pointed Caitian ears could be her downfall if Chapel wasn't careful.

A random synapse fired in Chapel's brain as she tried to figure out how to get to Sickbay without being noticed. The synapse grew into an unconscious thought, then into a fully conscious one--pointed Caitian ears, pointed ears, pointed Vulcan ears...

Chapel stepped out of the deserted turbolift in front of Spock's cabin, carefully checking the hallway for bystanders. When she determined the coast was clear, she headed for the door.

She paused momentarily before entering. Granted, she'd never walk in on Spock while he was in his cabin. Okay, maybe if he hadn't been eating, and she thought he might like some plomeek soup. Okay, then again, maybe if she had very important news to tell him. But aside from those two exceptions, Christine Chapel would never dream of entering the first officer's cabin without an express invitation.

Unless, of course, he wasn't there. It wasn't Chapel's fault she had memorized his work schedule. It's important to know things like that. She checked the hallways once more, then without further hesitation, stepped into the unlocked cabin.

The flame pot was flickering in the reddish glow of Spock's cabin. Chapel walked to it, placing her hand as close as she dared given her limited depth perception. The cabin was empty, of course. Mr. Spock might have beautiful eyes, a superior mind, and a damn fine ass, but he was predictable as hell. "Alpha shift duty, then fifty-five minutes conditioning exercises in the gym, three minute shower, then twenty-five minutes for dinner, two hours socializing with Kirk and McCoy, then off to his cabin," Chapel listed aloud in the privacy of the abandoned quarters. "Mr. Spock, you really should add a bit of variety to your schedule."

She wandered the quarters, exploring. The warmth of the cabin gave her a cozy feeling of security. "And that flame pot," Chapel continued her running monologue. "Is a fire hazard. You're putting the entire ship at risk. Just for that, you're going to have to fuck the head nurse until she screams like a Banshee. Sorry, buddy, them's the breaks."

Chapel giggled, picking up a black data pad from off the shelf. "Hmm, what have we here? Am I in your little black book, darling?" She pushed a single button and groaned in disappointment. "Fuel consumption reports? Oh, Spock, how could you?"

Chapel yawned, plopping down in a chair. "Mr. Spock, we're going to have to talk about this madcap existence of yours. I think it's time you settle down, stop all of this gadding about, give up the bachelor life for something..." She smiled, stretching into the cushions, then hugging herself sleepily. "More substantial."