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Meet the Characters
Roger
Father, husband and corporate cog. Still trying to master the technologies of the 1970s. Subscribes to the "Let-Mom-handle-it" philosophy of crisis management. Sports nut.
Andy
Mother, housewife, writer and grievance mediator. Always wanted to have lots of children; now knows better. Cooks a mean -- if not downright cruel -- tofu casserole. Sanest of the lot.
Peter
High-school junior with a senior-size ego. Bottomless stomach. Often forgets that football, soccer and baseball are meant to be played outdoors -- at least not in the living room. Procrastinator without equal.
Paige
High-school freshman, yet queen of the mall. Desperately waiting for Mr. Right to come along. Or Mr. Almost-Right. Or Mr. Almost-Almost-Right. Driven nuts by younger brother. Very well-read, if one counts Cosmo.
Jason
The younger brother. 10 years old and too smart for his own -- or his family's -- good. Loves math, science, comic books and tormenting his sister. Hobbies include plans for world domination.
Quincy
Jason's pet iguana.
Eats, sleeps, throws up on Paige's pillow.
The perfect pet.