Q:Why do women like to play Pac-man?
A:Because they can get eaten three times for a quarter.
Q:Why is life like a penis?
A:Because when it's soft it's hard to beat, but when it's hard you get screwed.
Q: What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
A: A bingo machine.
Q: What is Rodeo Sex?
A: Well, it's where your lady friend is on all fours, you are firmly ensconced from the rear with a breast in each hand, and you say to her, "This is the way your sister likes it too." You have eight seconds to stay in the saddle.
Q: What do you call a smiling Roman with pubic hair between his teeth?
A: Gladiator! (Glad he ate her)
Q: What is 69 squared?
A: Dinner for 4.
Q: What is the difference between erotic sex and kinky sex?
A: During erotic sex you use a feather, during kinky sex you use the whole chicken.
Q: What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?
A: A tea bag.
Q: What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
A: Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be a hell of a blowjob!
Q: When does a Cub Scout become a Boy Scout?
A: When he eats his first Brownie.
Prior to take off, passengers on a major airline were surprised to hear a woman's voice on the pilot's intercom.
She said, "Although I am a woman, I also am a fully qualified pilot and will be your Captain on this flight. I've had extensive training on all types of aircraft and can fly them as well, or better, than any man."
"If you wish to see a demonstration of my flying skills; once we have reached our scheduled flying altitude and the seat-belt sign has been turned off, feel free to unbuckle your seat-belt, stroll down the aisle and join me in the cuntpit."
