“It’s because I’m Canadian, isn’t it?” Melinda asked the bedroom wall. She sat on his bed with her arms wrapped around her folded knees, upon which her chin was rested. She had her long, curly red-brown hair pulled back in a braid and was wearing pajama bottoms and a t-shirt.

He turned away from the window and to her. His green eyes searched her profile and he rubbed his sweaty palms. He shook his head and exhaled heavily.

“No, it’s because you’re fucking another man.” He put bluntly. He was very good at that, it was one of the things she loved about him. She did love him, very much. Neither had ever said the words to one another.

“He’s hardly a man if it makes you feel any better.”

“It doesn’t. I thought I had something real with you.”

She didn’t look at his pleading expression. He wanted so badly to take back walking into her apartment two days before and finding her with Dave. It had been perfect until then.

“Fuck this,” were the words he’d muttered as he left her doorframe. He’d gone home and drank about a case of beer after he’d unplugged his phone and turned out the lights. He’d sat in the darkness, alone. She’d sat in the hallway outside, crying.

“So this is it? I guess it was never really anything to begin with.” She tried to make herself feel better. She would have succeeded if she’d been laying in bed with him. All she wanted him to say was, ‘okay, what’s your side of the story,’ and maybe even an, ‘I need you.’ She wouldn’t get either though.

They looked at each other for a few long minutes before she finally stood. She went to step toward him, but he shook his head slightly to dismiss the idea. He looked profoundly saddened by the situation. ‘I already miss you.’ She wished he’d say it.

“Drive carefully.” Was what he finally said. Those two words were easily translatable in his tone. Have a nice life. I still care about you. Good luck with your future. I hope you find real love someday. He’d once said that there is more in what you don’t say.

She walked out the front door of his apartment and got in her car and drove away.

“I’m pregnant?” She gasped at the doctor. She’d gone in for her band’s physical before they went on their European tour.

“Yes, Miss Reinualt, you are.” She replied. Her mouth dropped open and she looked away and to the floor. Fuck. She looked back at the doctor.

“But I just broke up with my boyfriend!”

“That doesn’t prevent you from becoming pregnant.” Melinda sighed heavily. She wanted to cry, her body made her.

In half-an-hour she was at her place staring at the phone. Should I call Jeff? Should I tell him I’m pregnant? Will he believe it’s his?

Two hours later she was in a diner talking to Courtney.

“Can you still go on the road pregnant?”

“I don’t know. They’re worried about what the vaccinations will do to the baby.”

“Then get an abortion.”

“What?”

“Get an abortion. It’s easy and legal and probably what Jeff will tell you to do anyway. You don’t seriously think he wants to be a father? Not after how he left you.”

Melinda sat on her couch eating handfuls of Captain Crunch. She was watching videos and reading pamphlets about the procedure. He doesn’t love me, he won’t care.

Jeff sat in a cafe, reading a book and drinking coffee when Courtney flopped down in front of him.

“You’re a real son of a bitch.”

“My mother would disagree.”

“You’re mom’s Catholic, right?”

“What is your problem?”

“So, your mom would hate that my bass player is getting an abortion because her son knocked her up and left her.”

Jeff sat back and his lips moved a little while he thought.

“You’re full of shit.” He said, defensively. They hadn’t used contraceptives.

“Oh yeah, that’s why I’m taking Melinda to the clinic tomorrow morning. I thought you should at least know about the whole thing. She wasn’t going to tell you, but I thought you should know that you’re a real asshole.”

Jeff was at Melinda’s fifteen minutes later.

“Is it true?”

“Of course. Let me guess, Courtney told you.”

“Is it mine?”

“You really should have given me the benefit of the doubt, Jeff. I haven’t been with Dave since a few months before you and I got together. Dave was forcing himself on me when you saw us kissing. He came right in and decided he was going to divide and conquer so to speak. You came in too late to know that though.”

“You should have told me.”

“I wanted to, but you wouldn’t have believed me.”

He could believe just about anything. He had three sisters.

“Can we do something about this?”

“I already am.”

That hurt him. He went home wounded and laid in his bed for the next twenty-three hours sleeplessly crying.

The nurse asked her all sorts of questions even when Courtney was there. In the end she went home, alone in the darkness. Courtney had driven her there, but she wasn’t there. Melinda spent the rest of the day curled up under her sheets.

The lock turned in her front door and she heard the footsteps advance to her bedside in the evening. She felt his hand as he ran it down her arm as he laid down beside her. He didn’t know how to touch her.

“I know what’s done is done, Melinda. I know I screwed up and I’m very sorry for that. You don’t know how sorry. I never realized how much I loved you until Courtney told me you were pregnant. I wanted to run to you and beg your forgiveness and that you would take me back. I wanted you back in my life more than I’ve wanted anything else. Even now, I still feel this way. I love you and I want to spend my life with you.”

She rolled over and gazed at his tear streaked face.

“I didn’t have the abortion.”

“What?” He asked, confused in disbelief.

“I didn’t go through with the abortion, I’m still pregnant.”

“You didn’t have the abortion?” He asked, the information began to settle in.

“No. After Courtney left me alone with the counselor I started having second thoughts. I guess I asked myself why you would bother to come to me last night after Courtney told you I was going to abort your child.”

“And?”

“I decided that maybe you loved me and maybe I should hold out in hopes that we could still have a chance together. Do you believe that I am with you and you alone? Do you believe that there is no one else in my life?”

“Yes.” He spoke without hesitation.

“So what do we do now?”

“God.” He said looking toward the ceiling.

“I thought you didn’t believe.”

“Man, I gotta ask someone. What do you want to do? Do you want to get married?”

“Is that a proposal?”

“Yeah.”

“You have to do better than that. I am the mother of your child.”

He pulled a box out of his pocket and handed it to her. She opened it up and saw the engagement ring inside.

“Wow, this is pretty nice.” She said.

“Yeah, I would have given it to you sooner, but...” He stopped and looked at her seriously. She looked back at him surprised.

“But you saw Dave kissing me.” Her eyes widened and she sat up and moved close to him. “You were going to propose to me then?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh my God! Then this is a legitimate proposal, not an ‘oh shit she’s pregnant’ proposal.”

“Yeah. We’ve been carrying on together for a while and I love you.”

She smiled and kissed him and after he slipped the ring on her finger. He looked at her and chuckled.

“I forgot the ring I snuck from you to size this at my place. I’ll get it back to you sometime.” She laughed and they kissed again.