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Dexedrine 2

saturday, september 15, 2001
5:39am
i took 3 tablets of dexedrine um...a while ago. i am feeling happy :) and energetic. i have that feeling i get in my back that makes me wanna shake spastically and alters my speech. i'm excited for no reason! yay! i'm still tired tho cuz it's like early and late and stuff but i couldn't go to sleep if i tried which is what i want because i need to be up in the morning!

5:44am
you know what the best feeling is? feeling patient and content. i’m not upset when the computer doesn’t load something right away because i’m all happy and stuff no matter what happens. :) yay :)

5:46am
i have a feeling i’m going to be on dexedrine all day.

6:01am
um the dry mouth kicked in a while ago. a few minutes? ten minutes? fifteen minutes? i have no conception of time. i almost want to be hyper and i have the slight urge to but i’m still kinda tired and not overjoyed, just kinda content. not as content as i was before because i miss people but more content than i would be. my mouth is dry.

6:06am
i want to be on a dexedrine high for the rest of my life.

6:19am
i’m not as happy and cheerful as i would like to be and i want to take more dexedrine but i don’t think i should.

6:22am
someone in a yahoo chat room got that white rabbit song stuck in my head. i’m late. i’m late. for a very important date. no time to say hello goodbye i’m late i’m late i’m late i’m late and when i wave i lose the time i save, my fuzzy ears and whiskers took me too much time to shave.

6:25am
yahoo chat sucks.

6:29am
you see, i’m overdue. i’m in a rabbit stew. can’t even say goodbye, hello, i’m late i’m late i’m late.

6:30am
my back hurts. i forgot that dexedrine seems to make my spine and shoulders crack way more than usual. that’s probably bad. but i don’t really care at the moment.

6:37am
i’m sweaty and stinky but i don’t want to take a shower until someone else wakes up. but i’m going to go to the basement and do a load of laundry right now. does that make sense? is this logical? no, it is not. i have to pee. i’m going to pee first, then i’m going to do laundry. then i’m going to come back up here. yeah.

6:46am
on my way back up the stairs i looked out the window and got all excited like....oooh...*grin* the sun i rising... *grin* all right! hooray for the sun! rising! just like it does every morning!

6:48am
i don’t really have anything to do right now. i could read my email, but it’s depressing. so i’m not gonna. i’m gonna play with search engines.

6:52am
my back hurts and i’m out of breath cuz i’m sitting up straight, kind of.

6:54am
i should probably find out more stuff about dexedrine. huh.

6:58am
dude, i’m sitting here on dexedrine, reading about why i shouldn’t take dexedrine. the sad thing is i’m probably gonna take more before the day is out.

7:01am
ah ha! perhaps i AM becoming tolerant! (that’s not a good thing.)
“People who abuse amphetamines and other stimulants--usually in attempts to lose weight or stay awake for prolonged periods--often find that a dose that had worked for a while is suddenly ineffective and they need a higher dose. They then become "tolerant" to the higher dose and have to increase the dose again. Soon, the person is addicted to the drug. Stopping it suddenly leads to a severe withdrawal reaction characterized by bad depression and extreme fatigue. Suicides have been reported in people who suddenly stop taking amphetamines.”
i’m an idiot! *grin*

7:06am
i think i’ll make caffeine my new drug of choice. now i just have to get some.

7:09am
i’m starting to be less energetic and more dazed. still feel good tho. i’m hungry.

7:15am
i’m hungry.

7:16am
as i walk through the valley of the shadow of death, i take a look at my life and realize there’s nothing left, cuz i’ve been blasting and laughing so long that even my mama thinks that my mind is gone.

7:21am
but i ain’t never crossed a man that didn’t deserve it. he be treated like a punk, you know that’s unheard of.

7:23am
owie. my back hurts.

7:25am
i just stuck a pen up my nose and made myself sneeze 4 times.

7:28am
i almost fell down the basement stairs.

7:30am
sit up straight, dammit! my legs are sore cuz i rode my bike a short distance the other day. something tells me that shouldn’t happen. i’m really fucking out of shape. you know what i need? i need a punching bag. or a person to beat the crap out of.

7:32am
i’m hungry.

7:36am
i just realised that it’s saturday. i knew this already, but i had forgotten that erin doesn’t go to school on saturday.

7:38am
i’m hungry.

7:40am
drinking water isn’t making me not hungry.

8:02am
dude, there’s still water in my cup? woah.

8:04am
man, my legs are sore.

8:08am
my fingers are cold. another side effect. i should probably take a shower soon, but no one else is up.

8:11am
i could so totally be a drug addict.

8:21am
i’m all lightheaded and stuff because i keep sitting up straight and stretching and stuff. wait a minute...i’m not doing any of that right now and i’m still lightheaded. never mind.

8:25am
i want to take more dexedrine right now, but i WILL NOT! ha, showed you, evil temptation. dexedrine rules. hell yes. but, i don’t want to stay up for 3 days again. i will take another tablet, later. not right now. god i love dexedrine. i think i heard the sounds of maybe people getting up. i hope so. i’m going to play minesweeper now.

8:28am
i have to go take a shower now. i will not be able to tell you like what’s going on and stuff while i’m in the shower or riding to traverse city. but i will try to sum it all up when i get there.

i think i took two more tablets that day. i felt kinda tired and stuff. i went to sleep at 8:00pm and woke up at 10:00am.