| I Have No One To Complain To. Lucky You Who Is Reading This! |
Today being Cinco De Mayo.
I really dislike living in a predominatly hispanic neighborhood. I mean I am hispanic myself. I just could go for some peace and quiet after work. I come home to honking horns and drunk people everywhere. So I leave and escape reality for a bit with my friend.
I find it funny when I arrive at my apartment to find in my hallway, a twelve pack of Tecate beer laid out. I mean someone must of gotten really bored to sit and stack these cans up in a row of 3 or 4 with 2 cans on each row.
Seriously, though. In my opinion I see no reason for all these people being out. I saw a lil 13 yr old girl (I'm guessing that's her age) flash her boobs. It's like ok. One you are the kind of kid who makes me ashamed to be a teenager. Two you are the kind of girl who makes me ashamed to be a female. Yet I am a lady and respect myself. I am just recently sickened by the lil girls running around trying to act grown-up. When in all reality. The sh!t is gonna hit the fan when they do actually grow up. It's sad really. So, I sit and ask myself. Do I really want a career is Child Pyschology?
I want to to help kids with problems in life. Because, I never had anyone to talk to. I look at these kids and they make me question my path in life. Oh well.. That's life. I will just work harder at changing the things I don't like.
:o) |
| I've Escaped Reality Once Again. |
Ok So The Honking Is Still Going On Today. Oh Well, I Deal. I've Made Many Updates On The Site Today.
New Pictures And Such. I Still Have Many More To Scan And Upload. Also, Backgrounds I've Created. Kinda Of Like The Ones You See On My Pages.
I Talked To A Friend Of Mine Who I Haven't Seen In Ages It Seems. It Was Great To Hear His Voice And Know That He's Doing Good. Not Great. But Good Is Still Better Than Nothing.
My Foot Has Fallen Asleep Many Times Today. It's Rather Annoying. I Should Stop Sitting Indian Style In My Computer Chair. Yah Yah..
Well Back To Updating The Site. Adios
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| I am here. You are there. I Have written. You are reading. |
Today was a good day. I smiled more than once. That's always a good thing. I saw my friend Ed today also.
We walked around downtown and talked. It was great.
I'm listening to Ben Harper right now. He's amazing.
I am counting the days till I get paid. Then it's off to buy Eric Clapton tickets. Hopefully they are not sold out. Then it's off to buy myself a guitar. Learn to play some more. First song to learn is Bob Marley's "One Love/People Get Ready". Then some Clapton. I have nothing more to say. I wrote some new poems that will be posted soon.
So I found out that my brother is the one who left the beer cans out in the hallway.
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| I was so afraid of you. |
I guess I could sya it's been awhile. Let's see. well not much new. been working. taking up space in resturants. I love doing that. I was refused a navel piercing. the guy said that I didn't have enough skin there. oh well. lets see. I cut my hair added a few lil highlighted strands of hair. it is now right above my shoulder black with some dark brown highlights. I will buy a digital camera on friday and get new pics of me online. I bought an inlfateable monkey his name is gerrald. went on my frist bike ride (crotch rocket) last saturday. it was great! I am listening to erykah badu N D'Angelo = your precious love.. right now. it's great. I've been spending alot of time reading the MOC Board.. entertaining. eating faaaaaaaaaaar too much ice cream. oh well all the fat goes to my tummy. and there isn't much there. I need bigger legs ya know...
I was so afraid of liking more than I wanted to. I was so afraid of falling for a person like you. someone who had made me happy. kept me laughing. a smile on my face. but sorry I had to end it. I couldn't take the emotions running through my body. they were too powerful. forgive me. if not today. tommorrow? someday you will have to look me in the eye and hopefully you will say you forgive me. I was selfish. I was scared of you. you are so much more than I. you can be greater and are greater than I. frightened that you would eventually realize I was not worth being with you so I left. gone. alone. sad. what shall I do. how can I make it without you. I will have to be strong. and carry on.
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