The Healer's Way

Personal Journal:

Entry 1: Day 1

All of this is so strange to me. I am used to machines, tests and my education to make a diagnosis. Where I am from, a planet on the outer rim of the galaxy, we are called Doctors or Physicians. Here they are called 'Healers'. They use something called 'The Force' to diagnose illness, heal wounds, and relieve pain. That's why I am here. I have been chosen to learn the way of the 'Jedi Healer', to bring this knowledge home to my people. They tell me it will be at least a year or more before I will return to my friends and family. I hope the time goes fast.

I am no one special, my name is Iliana Solfina and I am a Family Practice Physician. My practice is in a small village where rewards are few and I do my work for the love of it. I love my job; perhaps that is why I was chosen. I don't really know. The committee said I possessed the qualities of a healer and they felt I could easily accept and learn this mysterious art. Art, if that is the correct word; no, I think profession is the better word.

My arrival on the planet was uneventful, at least to those around me. I was overcome by the enormity of this place. The entire planet of Coruscant is one big City! I was escorted to the 'Jedi Temple', the place I will call home until my training is complete. This place is huge! My understanding is that it is the central headquarters of the 'Jedi'. The Jedi are the guardians of peace and justice. Much like the Knights of folklore, I think.

The Jedi are governed by ‘The Council’; they decide where members will be sent, debate issues, and are diplomats. I was introduced to several 'Jedi Knights' and 'Council Members' upon my arrival. One Council member is 'Master Yoda'; he is a small, green fellow who commands a great deal of respect. Master Yoda is the one who gave me my assignment.

I am to observe the Jedi Healer's and assist wherever I can. I was given a place to stay and an escort. Master Yoda made no qualms about why I was here. "Learn you are here to do, help you can, that is all." Though I am not a member of the Jedi order I could think of no other response than "Yes Master Yoda." The little creature seemed amused by my show of respect.

My quarters are small; only a few amenities are afforded the Jedi. I have a single living/sleeping area, a bath and a kitchen. Though I don't think I will wear them, I have been given the uniform of a Healer. The uniform is really no different than that of the Jedi Knights that I have met today. Tunic, pants, boots, obi, belt; save for a small emblem, written in a language I have yet to understand, sewn on to the left tabard.

I brought little with me. Clothes, sundries, books, pictures of my children; the one luxury I afforded myself is my disk player and some of my favorite disks. Though the Jedi live by a strict code of conduct, I am sure they are allowed time to enjoy a favorite past time.

* * *

Entry 2, 1 day later:

Last night I could not sleep. My mind was racing with anticipation and anxiety. Would I grasp what they were doing? Understand it, learn it? I have no doubt I can diagnose any patient, human patient that is, they request me to. But I am not here to do that, I was sent here to learn how they do it, I have to.

A buzz at my door brought reality crashing down around me. I did not feel very steady, knees shaking, quezy stomach, just exactly like my first day as an Intern. I pushed the button and opened the door. My escort was a Healer Apprentice named Ila'cha, she made me feel calm as she greeted me, and her tones of voice, and her movements were all very calming and caring. She said I was not the first to do this; nor would I be the last. She sensed that I would be a great healer and that many miracles would happen through my hands. I left feeling a little better about myself and what I was doing here.

The hospital, or 'Healing Center' was a short walk from my quarters. The Jedi Temple is actually a large complex of buildings. The Jedi Knights training facility encompass' the tallest of the spires. The Healing Center was a low tower only 5 or 6 story high and dwarfed by the training facility. My escort explained that the Jedi have been around for thousands of years; they are ambassadors, protectors, diplomats, farmers (yes, farmers) healers and teachers. Every Jedi starts his or her training or 'mission' at an early age, 6 months to 1 year is the average age of the 'initiate'. The initiate lives and trains at the Temple. By an initiate's 2nd or 3rd birthday their 'Force Gift', whatever that is, is usually apparent and they are trained toward that end. I inquired about family and was told they are kept at arms length; this allows for the initiate to focus on his or her training. Eventually each initiate is given a 'Master'. If no Master can be found there is no shame. Initiates may choose to leave the order or choose another of the Jedi professions. Though by our society's standards it seems harsh to take a child at such a young age, it is a great honor here. Apparently this Force is found in all living things and those who are Force sensitive are those chosen. Master Yoda informed me during our meeting that I was Force sensitive and would learn to harness and use the Force. I have no idea what he is talking about, but I have a feeling I will find out today.

The Healing Center looks like a hospital. Though I do not recognize any of the equipment, I am sure it will be not be a problem to figure it out. Ila'cha has introduced me to Healer Tonia whom I will shadow and learn from during my stay. My new title will be Padawan Healer Iliana. She too is a calm woman, (I sense a trend here) about my age. I think she was amused with my clothes, as she commented on how much I did not look like a healer. I guess wearing my white knee length coat and green scrubs was a dead giveaway. Perhaps when I feel more comfortable here I will wear the clothes I was given.

Healer Tonia introduced me to the other healers and apprentices or 'Padawan's' I will be working with. I have been assigned to what I discovered was the equivalent of the Emergency Room. Being a country Doctor I am used to emergencies of all types so I have no problem with the assignment.

The first case… A Jedi Knight's Padawan had been sparring with an energy weapon called a 'lightsaber'. I am not so sure I would allow a 10-year-old boy to use a weapon made of light energy, but it's not my place to question it. They young Padawan had been struck in the arm and a severe burn had been the result. His Master did not seem too concerned as she joked with him about his skills as a swordsman.

Healer Tonia examined the wound much in the same way I would. I expected her to apply antibiotic salve and a bandage. Instead she applied something she called 'Bacta', which I later found out is a substance used as a salve; or in an immersion tank, or digested for internal problems. I was rather astonished when she asked the boy if he had taken any time to heal himself. His answer was "yes". To which she smiled and praised him for his accepting the pain and working through it. I was impressed at they Padawan's composure. If only some adults I know could be so composed.

Healer Tonia then asked the boy to relax, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, the boy and his Master did the same. Suddenly I felt a strange sensation, almost as if a wave of energy was coursing through my body. I too closed my eye, and when the energy stopped opened them. To my amazement the boy's wound was almost completely healed! Only a small patch of red skin remained! I was speechless and they all must have seen the look on my face as they all smiled and broke into laughter.

After the examination and healing was over I asked Healer Tonia to explain what had happened? "The Force is what you felt. I was channeling my Force energy into the boys wound. He was channeling his Force energy into the wound as will. Soon you will understand it, you have felt it and that is the first step."

The rest of the day was filled with witnessing the wonder of the Force. I have begun to sense the energy in each patient I meet. I don't know why, cannot explain how I know I am sensing them, I just am. Be it a small girl with a sliver or an old gentleman (I think it was a he, it was hard to tell as the patient was a Wookie) with a heart problem. I began to feel them, feel their pain, their illnesses.

Later in the evening I was again visited by Jedi Master Yoda. His small green body reminded me of one of my children's toys. A slight chuckle escaped me to which he tapped my leg with his cane. "Find me funny, do you?"

"No, Master Yoda." I said rubbing my leg.

"Why do you laugh, hmmmmm?" Yoda cocked his head and twitched one of his ears.

"I was just remembering my children, Master Yoda."

"When 900 years old you become, a toy you will look like, no?" With that Master Yoda settled himself on a cushion and began my lesson.

Master Yoda kept me up most of the night teaching me to mediate and focus on the Force. I began to sense things around me, not their physical form, but their Force form. The Force, Master Yoda inform me resides in all living things in the form of Midichlorians, Symbiotic beings. I tried to grasp all he was saying, but I am not sure I fully understand.

I can hardly wait to see what tomorrow bring.

* * *

Entry 3: Day 8

Adjustment has not been easy. The life of a Jedi is a hard one. Every day brings new challenges and rewards. Learning to use the Force is not easy. Master Yoda is a patient teacher, and that is a good thing, because I am not sure I will ever get this Force thing down. I struggle day in and day out to sense anything, some days it seems I can sense something, others days, nothing. Master Yoda says that for someone my age the Force must be found within and nourished. It has been with me all my life, and I am just now learning to use it. I think it is like learning to walk all over again. Baby steps will hopefully lead to bigger ones.

I have been taking my meals in my quarters since I arrived, but was talked by my Master into having dinner in the Temple dining room. The food is something to get use to as well. I have never tasted such exotic items and none of them tasted like chicken! The dining area is the communal meeting place of the Jedi. They meet to eat; discuss the events of the day; tell a tale of their last mission or to just sit quietly and watch everything around them. I witnessed the latter with many of the elder Jedi. They just sit and watch, absorbing every thing, revealing nothing.

* * *

Entry 4: Day 14

A lot has happened in the last 2 weeks. I am no longer feeling homesick. I do miss my children very much, and I know they miss me too. I have made many friends and am starting to do some healing with the help of my Master (mentor). Though it has only been a short time and I have come a long way, there is still a lot to learn. I have seen many wonderful things and participated in many miracles (they were miracles in my eyes). During a recent visit to the Jedi Temple I watched a Master and his Padawan spar using their lightsabers. I was amazed at the agility and skill possessed by the two. They were sparring against each other, yet they moved as one. After the match I was introduced to them. Master Kenobi appears to be a year or two younger then me and his Padawan, Anakin, is 12 or 13. I have begun to use the Force to sense people's emotions and I sensed these two were very close, like brothers. I have met several Jedi Masters who I sensed were like Fathers or Mothers to their Padawan's, but this relationship was different; like brother teaching brother. Master Kenobi is very personable with a hint of boyish charm in his voice. I blushed a little as he took my hand. He is handsome with eyes that pierce the soul and a smile that melts the heart. Anakin, his Padawan, is a likeable young boy with a bubbly personality and a serious side when it comes to his training. I hope to run into them again.

* * *

Entry 5: Day 30

Death, a time of sorrow and of joy. Sorrow that someone we know has passed from this life and joy for the journey they are about to take. Today I witnessed the death of an elderly Jedi Master. I do not know his name, but his face I will never forget. He was brought to the Center some time ago to deal with a cancer that had invaded his body. I knew something was up when a group of Knights began to hold vigil. We made him as comfortable as possible and waited. When death finally claimed him, no one cried, except me. The only words that were spoken came from one of the Knights. “You are one with the Force, my Master, rejoice.” With that the Knights departed. Not knowing what to do I began to recite a verse I had heard long ago.

"Now cracks a noble heart. Good night, sweet prince, and flights of angels sing thee to thy rest."

Shakespeare

One of the Knights turned and thanked me for saying such beautiful words. I think the verse was more for my comfort than any ones.

* * *

Entry 6: Day 45

Not much time to write. I have spent most of my waking hours at the Healing Center. Master Tonia and I have become very close. She has become a good friend who listens to me when I am sad, or laughs with me when I am in a silly mood. Many nights are spent in meditation then talking to all hours of the morning. I think she is just trying to keep me tired; keep me on my toes. She informed me I would be given a mission in the near future; I am excited about the chance to do field work.

Today I witnessed a wonderful thing; I still tear up when I think about it. I will describe it in detail as it really touched me. I was called to diagnose a woman who had been brought in by her Husband. I arrived as the Healers were attempting to remove him from the room. I noticed Master Kenobi and his Padawan looking very worried, I smiled and touched their shoulders as I passed them, hoping to give them peace. The Husband was a tall man, in his early 50's who was being called Master Jinn by all in the room. He refused to leave his wife's side no matter how much anyone pleaded. For some reason I felt I could get him to leave; as my Master says, "It's the will of the Force." I approached this rather tall, intimidating man and placed my hand on his. I pushed a little of the Force through my touch and got his attention. His eyes left his wife and looked into mine, into my soul it seemed. Master Jinn then kissed his unconscious wife and left us to do our work.

The patient was groggy and coming around, she looked very pale. I decided to sit by her bedside and allow her to fully wake up before I began my examination. She appeared to be a woman in her lat 40's with dark graying hair and small features.

"How are you feeling?" A silly question, but it opens the door up for conversation. "A little tired and the headache is worse." Her voice was quiet and I sensed she really did not want all this attention.

Though I have been given a data pad, I still prefer to use pencil and paper (an obvious habit as with this journal). I take notes and place them into the data pad later. Though I have been here almost 6 weeks, I still use cheat sheets to remember all of the letters of their alphabet. Shmi Jinn, my patient, took note of my writing and commented on it. As I began to diagnose her condition I explained who I was and why I did things a little different. Shmi had been suffering from headaches, dizziness and weight loss over the last few weeks. She was not sleeping well and had frequent bouts with nausea. I wanted to run for my stethoscope and my bag to examine her, but they will not let me. I must use my hands and the Force to sense what is going on. Once I centered on her, I felt her presence and then another, fainter presence within her. Realizing what I had just sensed, I almost fainted myself. Taking a deep breath and regaining my composure, I continued with her examination. I knew she was pregnant, but still needed the test results to back my 'feeling' up. About 45 minutes later my 'feeling' was correct and the test results were positive.

I decided to enter my notes into the data pad as Healer Elman went to get Shmi's husband. Sitting at the small desk in the room I witnessed a sight I had seen over and over, but always touches me. This is a part of my job which I enjoy the most; telling a couple they will be bringing another life into the world fills me with joy for weeks to come.

Master Jinn, Qui-Gon, I believe is his name. Looked as though his knees were jello and his jaw had lost all muscle control. Shmi's eyes grew bright and her skin flushed past healthy to red as she tried to comprehend the news. Healer Elman and I decided to leave the happy couple to absorb the news and get over the initial shock.

Soon after Master Jinn emerged to break the news to Master Kenobi and Anakin, I explained to Shmi that the symptoms she had now would soon pass, but because of her age she would need to see her Healer more frequently and get more rest. She said she had not been pregnant for 13 years and could not remember what it was like. Having 2 children of my own, I assured her that her body would remember and so would she.

The wonder of today will carry me for weeks to come. I have sensed the miracle of life, and watched a family embark on a new journey. I think I am going to like being a Healer.




Return to Archive List

Continue on to Part Two