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Steve Austin Vs. Vince McMahon |
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A classic Employee vs. Boss sorta deal. After Steve Austin badmouths his boss, he is challenged to a Celebrity Deathmatch Match. Vince comes in with a coffin and tombstone ("Stone Cold Steve Austin: Hell Yeah! He's Dead!") and starts off the match with the upper hand. He stomps on Steve's feet and Austin isn't given a chance to strike back. He is barreled into the stage while McMahon taunts into the hole. From behind, Steve smashes through the floor and performs a Stone Cold Stutter, which earns him the win. But he's not done yet. Encouranged by the crowd, he bashes Vince into pieces with the tombstone and places the shards into the coffin, awaiting to set it ablaze.
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Adam Sandler Vs. Chris Rock |
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Okay, so they didn't WILLFULLY fight each other, but the viewer is always right in the Celebrity Deathmatch Faaaaaaaaandemooooooooniuuuuuum! So the crack team of CD SWAT Teams captured them and brought them to the Arena. At first they refused to fight but when pressured, they pretended to fight, which no one bought. Mills Lane lost his patience. "Alright, if you won't get it on, I'll get it on for you!" Mills cries as he turns on the Fan of Fandemonium (tm) which descends on the fighters and both with die if they don't have a winner. So after painstaking fighting, Chris Rock executes a Mexican Liver Punch and throws Sandler into the Fan's control panel which officially shocks him to death. But Lane can't stop the Fan, and when Chris Rock tries to get out of the ring he is cut to pieces.
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Carmen Electra Vs. Jenny Mccarthy |
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Buxom babes with mud and blood is what you wanted, so you get it! Celebrity Deathmatch Champion Howard Stern will be our ref, who is hoping for some hardcore action. Every so often when the battle heats up, Stern sends them back to their corners and flirts around with one of the opponents. Once they get fed up, they both go against Stern and push him into the mud. "Hey, you want what I gave to Kathie Lee?" He threatens as he bends over and tries to pass some gas. But his butt is caked with mud and is clogging up his colon. Jenny warns Electra to run, then exclaims, "Sucker!" as she kicks away the mud blocking the gas. Stern goes flying--- straight into Electra, and they go into a brick wall. Howard Stern is moaning. "Oh, God, my ass, it's ruined! Hey Carmen, was it good for you too? ....Carmen?"
