Series: Final Fantasy X

Pairings: Jecht + Auron, Implied Auron + Braska

Warnings: sort of experimental…but not really. ^^;;  **sweatdrops**

Very much inspired by the trippiness of Utada Hikaru’s music video for her song, “Sakura Drops.”  So that’s what I named it.

Hooray for creativity, I know. >.<

Written for the FFX Yaoi’s Lyric Wheel challenge.  This time’s lyrics are from Savage Garden’s “Break Me Shake Me.”

Sakura Drops

It’s world of mystical impossibilities.  Not at all how I imagined the Farplane, but I shan’t complain.

::Jecht?  Where are you?::

I look around myself, at the bright blue sky, the shining water, the too-green colors of the forest around me.  I bend to look at the white flowers, and find that they have  bird’s heads, peering at me intently and chirping delightedly. 

I smile, lost in this colorful, kaleidoscopic world.  Not that I mind idling here for a moment.  There is a carpet of flowers beneath my feet, spinning like a child’s pinwheels in the wind.  They bend not to my weight, but seem to curl around me instead, letting me pass through them.  How odd.  I lie down, and stare at the sky, watching various clouds in the form of fish and birds fly by, flapping their wings or moving their fins to ethereal air of this land. 

I can’t find Jecht, nor Braska either, but I feel as if in no hurry.  There is a quiet peace about me, like I am wrapped in the warm blankets of a comforting embrace, with no real wish to leave.  I am content to stay as I am for now, the yellow flowers curled around me like young children, laying their soft flowery skins at my cheek.

“You know, Jecht,” I begin saying, as if he’s really there and listening, “you moved me in a way that I’d never known.”  I grin, remembering his exuberant good humor and courage.  Somehow, that brought me out of the shell of isolation I’d enclosed myself in, once I realized that Braska would never be mine.  I had sworn to myself that I’d never love another man, but straight away, Jecht just moved into my heart.

It was confusing at first, having Braska treat that man as if he was his own brother, letting the man get drunk, get surly, address him rudely and not as “my lord.”  It angered me at first, the way he carried himself, but somehow…

I shake my head, sighing.  I lift my hand up, and catch a stray petal the wind has blown to me.  It blinks at me with its pink eyes, curiosity intent behind its gaze.

“Well,” I continue, speaking to Jecht, myself, and the thing in my hand, “I had to live with a ton of regrets back then.”  If the petal could have nodded, I’m sure it would have.

Braska and I had been friends since we were children, and it had always been a madness to withhold my emotions from him, not to tell him how much I loved him.  I didn’t want the other people to know.

He’d protected me when I was younger, so I thought to do the same when we grew up.  It was some sort of obsession.  If I couldn’t love him, then at least it would be all right to protect him.  And I’d have done anything for him back then.

A large feathered bird alights next to me, stretching its impressive wingspan and giving me a knowing look.

“Yes,” I say, nodding to its words, which had crept into my head.  I’d have done anything for Braska.

I remember our one heated encounter, it had been a particularly happy evening that we’d spent in each other’s company, and we both seemed quite reluctant to end it.  So one thing had led to another, which had led to us both tumbling into my bed, a little too drunk to see straight.  We had really meant to keep that platonic.  Or at least he did, but that pretense quickly dissolved.

I remembered the sweet feeling of his body pinned beneath mine, our flesh joined, our bodies rubbing against each other, slick with a sheen of sweat between us.  Our moans filled the room, echoed off the walls and drifted out into the Bevellan air.

It was almost noon when I had awakened, but by then, Braska had gone.  He had folded my clothes before he left, and they had been sitting on my chair.  It was clear to me then, that he would never be mine.  And a great sadness came over me, and stayed there for a long time.

“Oh, Jecht,” I sigh, as the golden light fades into a silvery midnight, and the flowers curl up and begin to sleep, leaving me with tall blades of grass in the chill night air.  There’s no moon out, but there is a light.

“Jecht?” I murmur, hoping the wind carries his name to him, wherever he is.  And suddenly, as the breeze shifts and the birds take flight, I feel an ineffable urge to be with him again.

I close my eyes, breathing in the air.  It has a sharp, salty edge to it, that reminds me of our first kiss in Bevelle.  It had taken an extremely long time for me to realize what I felt for him.  And even then, even when he took me in his arms, crying about Braska like a baby, and kissed me, I hardly felt it stir.  It wasn’t until later, when we he had fallen into an exhausted sleep, and I had lain my head on his tattooed chest, that I realized it was right.  Everything was right, and he’d promised me I’d never be alone again. 

“Yeah, you owe me for that!” I shout to sky, and the flowers stir a little, blinking at me sleepily.

“Sorry,” I apologize, giving them a nod, and they go back to sleep.  “You really owe me for that one, Jecht.”

But no one answers, not even the peacock feathers drifting idly by.  I shrug, unshaken by the spider which creeps up my arm, chattering noisily of Spira.  I shake my head and tell it go home, or at least get some food to eat.

“Or better yet, tell Jecht I’m waiting for him.”  The spider skitters off, and I lie back down as the sun begins to rise again.

“Can’t wait much longer, you know,” I say to myself, pondering where it is that Jecht has got himself to.  “Aren’t you here?”

 The red flowers beneath the ocean shake their heads at me sadly. 

“Not here?” I exclaim, feeling cheated of my solace.

“What do you mean he’s not here?”

The grand tree I stare at just blinks and me, and shrugs its large, dark shoulders.  ‘Not here’ obviously means ‘not here.’ 

Which means…I sigh, sinking to the ground, and crushing a few of the flowers that are just waking up from their slumber.  Maybe he was still ‘back there.’  Which meant, that that’s where I was supposed to be too.

I sigh, and pick myself up.  The flowers are dead, their crimson-clothed bodies crushed and broken beneath my feet.  Somehow, that image seems familiar to me, though I don’t know how.  I shake my head, but the feeling sticks.  I frown.

“Jecht?” I try again, waiting for an answer.

Not here.

Not here.

I must have left him, or he must have gotten lost.  But either way, I had to find him, and bring him here.  Because well, we’re supposed to be together.  And that was exactly that.

I scoop up the broken flowers in my hand.  Poor things, what will they do now?  I decide to take them with me.  Maybe they’ll help me get home.  I smile, and I can feel Jecht, somewhere, lost, confused, and frightened…but he still grins back.  And I start my journey back, walking towards that memory.

~*Owari*~

Okay, that was short.

Sorry about that. 
Didn’t feel too much inspired.  **sniffles**

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