do i prey on you
the way you prey on me?
my memories of you are vultures 
picking at the stupid parts of my brain
i nver wanted to feel like this again
god damn you
i hate you because you make me want to be near you
i hate you because you don't know that you do it
i hate you because i want to be more special to you than any other
i hate you because i never got a poem in response to the one i wrote you
i hate you because i love you
and i never wanted to feel like that again
despite what i've said
but i love you because near you, i can forget that i suck
i love you because you see me as better than i am
i love you because you know i am worse and love me still
i love you because  i forget that i hate you 
until i am alone
i don't think you know
but do you ever think about me just because?
wish for me at night, when you are lonely?
i doubt that very much 
but late at night i have to pretend something