::A Perfect Mess::

A Perfect Mess

“And we’re back.  We’re going to take a call…Nadine from Chicago?” 
	“I’m here.  Okay, I don’t have a personal question, it’s just a general question for the guys.” 
	“Sure, go ahead. We’re listening,” Michael said. 
	“Okay.  My friends and I were watching the movie, ‘Simply Irresistible.’…” 
	“Good movie!! You guys have good taste!!” 
	“Yea!  I love that movie!!” 
	“Me too.” 
	“Oo it’s soo good.  Guys, after the show let’s go watch it.” 
	“Okay, my parents and all my brothers aren’t going to be home.” 
	“Yess!!  Movie night at Piper’s!!!” 
	Kyle rolled his eyes at Ashleigh.  “Go ahead Nadine with your question…” 
	Ashleigh’s eyes lit up, but Piper spoke up first. “OH!!  I know your question Nadine!!  Is it with the whole belt thing?” 
	“Yea!!” Exclaimed the caller. 
	The girls began laughing, while the boys stared at the audience and themselves. The audience was split too. Girls were laughing and talking to each other, while the boys had no idea what was going on.  Obviously, not many guys seen the movie. “So guys,” Cali giggled.  “How many times a day you think about sex??” 
	“In a day??” 
	“It kinda differs day by day.  Like, you guys want a number?” 
	“Yea.  Aguessament.” 
	The boys looked at each other. “Mannn… What kind of question is that??”
	"Whatdaya mean, what kind of question is that??  All girls want to know!!  Be serious." 
	Piper looked each boy in the eye.  "In the movie, one of the characters admits that guys think about sex...uh I forgot what the amount was, but he told it.  Then Sarah Michelle Geller does the math and says that's it's impossible.  It would be once every like ten minutes." 
	"Wait."  Kyle sat up straight.  "Sarah Michelle Geller is in this movie??"
	"Yea."
	He threw himself back on the couch, "And I never saw it!!  Does she get naked??" 
	Cali laughed. "No." 
	Tyler nudged his brother, "THAT'S why you didn't see it!!"  The audience laughed.  "Okay Nadine, girls...whoever.  There is no real amount to how much guys think of sex.  It differs between each guy.  I can just say that it's a lot." 
	"We think of sex a lot, but realize that we think of other things."
	Ashleigh hugged a pillow with a smile, "Yea, like sports and what you're going to eat next."
	“No.  Other things,” Michael rolled his eyes.  “We notice a girl’s personality, how she acts towards others.  Lots of stuff.  We just like the general idea of girl, especially their asses.”
	“There are other things.  Michael’s right,” Tyler noted. 
	“But not much!” Kyle laughed.  “You girls start it though.  You wear tight shirts and short shorts.  You wash your hair in little perfumey-shampoo’s. You use makeup to look better and you smell good.” 
	“So that means we are the ones that force you to think of sex?” 
	“Well…you ask for it.”
	“We ask for it?!?” Ashleigh’s head tilted, waiting for Kyle to take back what he said.  Madison threw her hand up and pretended to cut her neck to make him get the message and quit.  
	He didn’t.  “Yea.  You hear all the time about some cute or hot girl that wears revealing clothes and she fools around with a boy and then she calls rape on it.  If a girl wears a tighter than usual shirt than she should expect guys thinking about sex.  They should know that we don’t think with our heads.” 
	“Whatever!!”  Ashleigh held her hand up.  “Not all girls that get raped wear tight clothes.  There are others that just get it because the guys are motherfuckerassholes.”  Only when the show airs it will come out like ‘motherf*keras*les.’  Don signaled to Ashleigh to go to commercial.  She crossed her arms angrily, “Fine.  Commercial break.  See ya in five!  Eat a sandwich.  Choke on it.”  Maddie and Piper laughed, while everyone else kind of just sat there with wide eyes. They weren’t used to a truly pissed off Ashleigh.  She spun around in her seat to face Kyle, “And that whole thing with thinking and penises.  I’m sure that’s true to some degree, but you know whether or not the girl wants it.  And no real man would…” She was so upset that she couldn’t even finish her thoughts. “I can’t believe you think that.”	
	“Yea…well, girls deserve it.  If they get in that situation, they can just say no.  It’s that easy.”  Kyle looked over at Ashleigh.  He didn’t like that look.  “If looks could kill,” he thought immediately.  He began regretting what he said and tried to make it better.  “Well.  I just mean that you girls don’t help us with not thinking of sex, some girls are a tease.”
	Apparently this was the wrong words to say.  Ashleigh threw a pillow square in his face, a corner hitting his eye.  He should have known it was coming.  Kyle rubbed his eye, because it really hurt him.  His eyes began to water.  “Damn!!  That was my eye!!” 
	“Now!!! That!!! is my fault!!” 
	Kyle wiped his eye.  “Man, Ashes!!  You know I didn’t mean it like that!” 
	“Hmph!!” 
	“Ashes!!” 
	“I said ‘Hmph.’” 
	Cali smiled nervously, “So um.  Can we start talking about something else?  This really isn’t such a good topic.” 
	Michael sat forward.  “Why not?  We should continue this.  Well, not this fight.  A lot of girls get raped and they are watching this show.” 
	Fred liked this idea.  “Yea.  We can have a whole special.” 
	“Ummm.  How about not?  Let’s just try to get through this show before we make some specials.” 
	Kyle kept glancing at Ashleigh, who was in mid-pout.  She refused to look at him.  Usually he would shrug this off, but this pout was different.  Could she actually be angry this time?  “C’mon Ash.  What’s wrong?” He whispered, making sure that she was the only one who could hear him.  She ignored him still.  “Ash!  Ash!!” He whispered a little louder.  She didn’t even flinch or anything.  He threw the pillow she threw at him at her stomach.  At least Ashleigh moved this time, but she continued to look straight ahead, very annoyed.  “Okay. I know you can hear me…I didn’t mean for what I said to come out like that.  You don’t have to mad at me for something stupid that I say.  We would never speak to each other, if you got mad for every time I said something stupid.” 
	She didn’t even laugh.  She just turned her head towards him, her eyes still flashing in anger.  “Don’t you ever say that I deserved it!” She gritted angrily through her teeth.  “I used to actually think you were an awesome-amazing person, but you are nothing but a snotty disgusting frat boy who forgot to join the frat.  Next time I think you are a decent human being, I’ll just remember what you said today.” 
	“What the hell?”  
	“Don’t dare talk to me for the rest of the show.”  She looked over at Kyle, who had his mouth wide open.  “Don’t.”  Her eyes flashed with anger and she whipped her head up to the front.

The show finally came to an end and they didn’t have another show to tape.  The group entered into their dressing rooms.  “Hey Ash are you okay?” Madison hugged her friend.  “I’m sorry he said that.” 
	“Yea, me too, but I don’t think he knew what he was saying.” 
	Piper patted the seat next to her.  “You know that it is hard for Kyle to get what he really means across.  He’s not one with words”  Ashleigh sat down and Piper began to brush Ashleigh’s long blonde hair.  “He’s just a dumb boy.  If he knew what happened, he would have kept his mouth shut.” 
	“Aghhh.  It just pissed me off.  It’s not like it’s him. There are many boys that think the same way.  It just pisses me off cuz I figured he would be better than that.  He should have known.” 
	Cali rubbed her lipstick off, “That’s very true.  It was very stupid of him.  But it can’t all be his fault.  The boy isn’t a mind reader…” 
	“Thank gawd!!” Ashleigh laughed. 
	“It’s not like you have a sign on your forehead saying what happened to you.” 
	“Again, thank gawd.”  Ashleigh rubbed her forehead.  “I didn’t think my forehead was big enough to have a sign that big.”  Piper was done brushing her hair and Ashleigh sat up and put on her original shirt, a blue shirt with pink flamingos.  She grabbed her purse.  “I feel better now.  I’m going to go talk to him.” 
	Madison sighed.  “You don’t have to tell him Ash…he doesn’t need to know.” 
	Ashleigh nodded, “I know, but I sorta want to.” 
	Maddie looked her friend in her eye.  Ashleigh already made up her mind.  “Okay then.  Call me later though okay?”
	“I will.”  Ashleigh left the girls dressing room in search of Kyle. 
	Madison sat down next to Piper.  “Do you think she’s really okay??” 
	Piper shrugged and then wrapped her arm around Maddie, “I don’t know.  I think she was just shaken up.  It’s been a while since she last thought about it.” 
	“Yea.  I guess she’ll be fine.  She got this far hasn’t she?” 
	Cali smiled, “I got a great idea to cheer her up.  Let’s go buy some coloring books and crayons and then go to her house like, at…830.  That will give her some time…” 
	“Good idea!!!”
	Ashleigh knocked on the guy’s dressing room.  “Come on in!!” One of them shouted.
	“Hey guys.”  Ashleigh looked around and saw Michael, Tyler and Fred but no Kyle. 
	“Hey Ashleigh.  Are you okay now?”
	“Yea.  What was that all about it?  I’ve never seen you that pissed at Kyle before and you’ve been mad at him a lot of times,” Tyler laughed. 
	“Yea. I’m fine.” Ashleigh nodded, even though she was half lying.  “Sorry about earlier.  Is Kyle around?  I don’t see him.” 
	“Nope.  He changed quickly and left.  He probably didn’t want to run into you.” 
	Fred laughed, “Hell, I’d be scared too.  You looked possessed! I thought you were going to go all Medusa on him.” 
	“So where is he?” 
	“Eh.  He should be heading home.  He said he had to go think.” 
	“Alright then.  See ya guys!”  Ashleigh turned and walked out of the boy’s dressing room.  She looked around the hallway and started in full sprint.  She had to hurry otherwise she would never have the guts to talk to him.  She ran past the elevator knowing that waiting for it was a waste of time and went fully to the stairs. 
	Kyle walked out of the elevator.  “I am such an ass,” he said out loud.  He got out his car keys and walked out of the building.  He needed a cold shower.  It would help his mind think of some apology.  It would have to be a really good one, because he made a major boo-boo this time.   He looked up at his car amazed. 
	Ashleigh was sitting on the rear of his car.  He couldn’t read her facial expression, with the wind blowing her hair around, so he walked up to her cautiously.  She threw her hair to one side and began pulling on it uneasily.  He jammed his hands in his pockets.  “Hey Ashes.  I thought about the words I said and your reaction.  I finally figured it out.” Kyle wasn’t used to the docile Ashleigh that was sitting on his car.  She played with her hands nervously.  Then she pulled on her hair some more.  Ashleigh was about to open her mouth, but then closed it to looked down to play with her hands again.  She was fixated on them, afraid of looking at anything else.  “I thought about it the whole show and I really am sorry.  If I knew, I would have never…” 
	Ashleigh wiped a tear with a half smile, “I was going to say that I hated yogurt.” 
	“When did it happen?” 
	“Oh well…I always hated it.  Never liked it.” 
	“No…the other…thing.”  
	Ashleigh played with her hands some more. “Freshman year.” 
	“Wow.”  Kyle brushed his hair back nervously.  He wasn’t good with dealing with these kinds of things.  “Did you know him?” 
	She became stiff as a board, no longer playing with her hands or hair.  She sat completely still, but her hair flew uncontrollably in the wind.  Ashleigh made no effort to move the hair out of her face.   She stared into Kyle’s eyes, but it looked as if she was looking past him as if she was looking thru him to help her find something inside her.  “He was my fuckhead boyfriend, who had a beady eyes and a watermelon head.  I have no idea why I liked him.  We were fooling around and I didn’t want to go any farther, but…” 
	Kyle couldn’t believe that this was the same Ashleigh that he saw everyday.  The one that never let anyone (except for Maddie) push her around.  He couldn’t take Ashleigh’s watery eyes anymore.  He gave her the most comforting hug that he could.  “I felt so dirty…  Everytime I took a shower, I would scrub my skin until it was red and sore.  I took at least 5 showers a day.  And still the dirtiness wouldn’t come off.” Kyle sensed something was wrong and backed off for a second.  Ashleigh continued to look past him.  She began to rub her arms and trembled forwards and backwards, in a trance.  “Scrubbing and scrubbing and scrubbing.  Nothing coming off.  Scrubbing and scrubbing and use more soap, scrub some more.  Scrubbing and scrubbing and scr…” 
	Kyle realized what was happening and grabbed her shoulders to snap her out of it. “Ashes!!”  She broke out of the memory and smiled. 
	“I smelled really good that year…” she laughed nervously.  “My older sister was the only one that caught on.” 
	“So no one else knows?” 
	Ashleigh shook her head, “The girls know, but I never got to give them details. I made myself forget a long time ago.” 
	Kyle shook his head. “You made yourself forget? How can you do that??” 
	“Yep.”  Ashleigh hopped off the trunk.  She began to sound like a psych book. “It is a defense mechanism that many victims experience.  The mind suppresses the trauma and fills it with blackness or fuzziness.  It is closed off, until the mind is ready to experience the event.  It’s actually quite common.” 
	He ruffled his already mussed up hair.  Only Ash would quote a psy book at a time like this. “So I guess it’s a good thing that you don’t remember much huh?” 
	“Yea.  Bits and pieces.  Before and after.  Little this and little that.” 
	Kyle put his head down.  “Well, I am really sorry.” 
	“Ashleigh shrugged, feeling much better. “It’s okay.  You weren’t the guy who…of course if it was you,” she nudged him.  “It wouldn’t be rape.”  She giggled. 
	Kyle smiled and nudged her back. “Oh really??”  He subconsciously wondered how she can be so jokingly about it.  “I guess she has to,” he thought.  He smiled down at the short blonde girl standing in front of him.  “I am going to make a promise to you.  I, Kyle Alexander Wilson..” 
	“Your middle name is Alexander.  That is so cute.  You look like a little Kyle Alex.  Oh.  No matter why they call Tyler James and you just Kyle.  Kyle Alexander…”  She laughed.  “Hey K.A.  kick ass….and your initials are KAW…as in karate KAW.”  She whipped her hands around imitating Jackie Chan. “KAWWW!!” 
	Kyle took both of her hands in effort to shut her up. “I, Kyle Alexander Wilson promise to protect you, Ashleigh Elizabeth Dowling…It is Ashleigh Elizabeth, right?”
	“Yep,” she said with a nod. “Go on.  What do you promise?” 
	“I promise to protect you. Whenever some guy treats you bad, I get to kick his ass.  I have to make up for not being there.” 
	“But you moved here junior year.  This was way before.” 
	“Soo.”  Kyle moved Ashleigh closer to him.  “I’m still making up for it…” 
	“Keep going… I feel like I’m on the WB.” 
	“Then you should know that the ending credits start…” He leaned his head towards hers.  She gulped nervously.  “…Now.”  He opened his door and hopped in. 
	“What??  You got to be kidding me.  You can’t just do that!!” 
	“Yea I can.”  He started his car.  “You have to wait until next episode.” 
	Ashleigh opened the side door and jumped in the front seat.  “Fine. But then you have to treat me to McDonalds.” 
	“Says who?” 
	Ashleigh smiled and batted her eyes, “Says your co-star.  Puh-lease!!” 
	Kyle rolled his eyes and started to drive off.  “Fine.  I don’t have much money though so none of your pig antics. You eat as much as I do.” 
	Ashleigh smiled, “Okay then.  I only want three hamburgers extra extra pickle, a mcshaker salad, the one with ham and turkey and cheese, and a large fry and a small diet and a shamrock shake.” 
	“A shamrock shake??” 
	“Yea.  I’m Irish. I have to celebrate my heritage.”

~*~ rol home ~*~