By Kitsunemajic
Kurama: *In police station* WHAT?!
PO1: He's been put on death row.
Kurama: FOR WHAT?!
PO2: Ma'am please calm down
Kurama: I AM A MAN! MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!
PO2: -androgyny
PO1: The fact remains is he's on death row and is scheduled for death the 25th.
Kurama: ...that's tomorrow!!
PO2: And it's Christmas Eve.
Kurama: ...I'm Jewish.
PO1: Really?
Kurama: No not really.
PO1: Oh. Darn. But anyway, there's nothing ya can do for him.
Kurama: Ohhhh my Hiei!
PO2: What's a Hiei?
Kurama: ...*goes and hits his head on the wall, over and over again*
(2 minutes later)
PO1: *Boots Kurama out the 3rd story window*
Kurama: DON'T THINK YOU'VE SEEN THE LAST OF MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *Smacks ground* AAAHHH!
(In the Insertname State Penitentiary)
Hiei: *In his prison cell* Dear Diary, the guy in the next cell is all hairy and scary looking....he reminds me of Smokey the Bear
Roomie: Hey guy, what ya writin in?
Hiei: my diary.
Roomie: Can I see?
Hiei: Sure why not? *Whaps him with it* You MORON! Get back to your end of the cell!
Roomie: *Rubs head* That wasn't very nice. And just in case you haven't noticed, this cell's only 6 feet long.
Hiei: ...This is true.
Roomie: What are you in for?
Hiei: Uh, I robbed a bank, violated some traffic laws, and I ran over a guy.
Roomie: ...That's it?
Hiei: Yep.
Roomie: Oh Puh-leze! That's not even enough to get you in PRISON!
Hiei: Seriously? I knew there was something shady going on! Say, how'd you get in?
Roomie: I killed 60 people and kidnapped the Queen of Britain's cat.
Hiei: ...Wow.
Roomie: I know. Well you should break out! This is unjust!
Hiei: Exactly! *Runs up to bars and *
Roomie: WAIT
Hiei: *And is shocked by 600,000,000 volts of electricity*
Roomie: a second.
Hiei: *Sizzles* This...may be harder than I thought.
(At Kurama's house)
Kurama: *Chibi-fied* WAAAAAAH! My buddy's in JAAAAIL!! I MUST BAIL HIM OUT!*Un-chibi-fies and paces room* But how...*Snaps fingers* Ah-ha.
(In INSP)
Hiei: *Collapses on bed* It's no use! INJUSTICE![1]
Roomie: I told you that wouldn't work. So what cha gonna do now?
Hiei: Guess I'll wait for Kurama to bail me out.
Roomie: BAIL?! Your on DEATH ROW. There IS no bail!
Hiei: O.O!! Are you serious?!
Roomie: Tch, yeah!
Hiei: ...Darn. Hey guard!
Guard: Yes?
Hiei: Do you know when I'm due to the EC?
Guard: Oh um...*checks schedule* Ah, the 25th.
Hiei: What's today?
Guard: ...24th.
Hiei: O_O!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! THAT'S TOMORROW!
Guard: I know, ironic huh? *Walks away*
Roomie: Sorry guy, guess this is it.
Hiei: NOOO! I can't die yet! I'm too young!
Roomie: Yeah, pity for a 12 year old to die.
Hiei: ...I'm 23!!
Roomie: O_o Wow, what horrible growth genes!
Hiei: *Chibi-fies* Why?! THIS IS INJUSTICE!
Roomie: Mucho. Gee, you don't even have time to think about what you've done, it's midnight.
Hiei: ...WAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
(The Day of the 25th)
Guard: Hey Spikey what the?
Hiei: *Still screaming*
Roomie: Hey guy, guy! It's time.
Hiei: NOOO
Guard: *Shocks him with a stun gun*
Hiei: Aw that didn't hurt a bit! *Keels over*
Guard: *Drags him out*
Hiei: *Wakes up in EC* Ugh, what? Where am I? Oh no...NOOOOO
Guard 2: *Hits him with the butt of his gun* Quiet!
Hiei: Owwww! What is this, a conspiracy against me?!
G2: Any last words kid?
Hiei: Yeah, just one.
G1: Shoot.
Hiei: I
Kurama: INJUSTIIIIIIICE!
(Kurama storms the place in a kilt with a sword backed up by hoards of demons)
Hiei: Kurama?!
Kurama: YOU CAN TAKE MY PRIDE BUT YOU WILL NEVER TAKE MY BUDDY! Take what you want, the fire demon is mine!!
Hiei: ...Kurama? *Sniffles* He came to save me!
Kurama: *Knocks out guards and frees Hiei* Hey, are you alright?
Hiei: *Chibi-fies* YAY! *Latches onto Kurama's leg*
Kurama: Well, I guess that's good. *Whistles for troops* LET'S GO MEN! VICTORY IS OURS! *Storms out with troops*
(4 hours later at Kurama s house)
Kurama: See? Everything turned out right in the end!
Hiei: Yup. *Looks out window* Hey what's that white stuff?
Kurama: *Looks out window* Hey it's SNOWING! It hasn't snowed here in like 5 years!
Hiei: Cool! Hey Kurama?
Kurama: Yeah?
Hiei: Uh...thanks fer saving me.
Kurama: Awww no problem! I couldn't let them kill my buddy!
Hiei: *Chibi-fies and latches onto Kurama* YAY!
Kurama: Uh merry Christmas to you too buddy.
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[1] Quote from Wufei of Gundam Wing. Gotta love that show.
And thus ends the SBI.
Next: Hiei goes to Nashville New Years Edition.