Disclaimer: The Tenchi Universe is property of Pioneer. Who Wants to be a Millionaire belongs to the dark lord Satan, as does the demonic hell spawn Fil'Bin. Enjoy.

No Need for Philbin-a Tenchi Muyo skit starring Kain.

Regis Philbin: Welcome back to Who Wants to Be a Millionaire! I'm Regis Philbin, and our contestant tonight is Kain. Welcome to the show, Kain.
Kain: My patience grows thin. Commence with your inquiries, Mr. Philbin.
RP: Ok, don't 'have a cow, man'. (chuckle)
(Kain's eyes narrow)
RP: Uh...ok, first question. This feathered animal makes a quacking sound. Is it: A, a cow; B, a duck; C, an elephant; or D, a crocodile?
K: The answer is B. It is insulting for you to even ask me that, you fool.
RP: Is that your final answer?
K: What?
RP: Are you sure it's B?
K: Yes, now ask the next question.
RP: Would you like to use a lifeline?
K: No! I said B is the answer! Move on before I decide to destroy you!
RP: So you don't want to use a lifeline? How about an audience poll?
K: urgh...B IS MY FINAL ANSWER, YOU USELESS MORTAL!
RP: (After long silence) Yes, B is correct! You've won $100!
(Applause)
RP: Ok, the next one is for $200. You wanna keep going?
K: Yes.
RP: Are you sure?
K: Do not test me, human. The power of Kain is beyond your comprehension.
RP: Ok, big guy. (chuckle) Let's move on. The next question is for 200 bucks: This species is the only one on this planet that speaks English. Is it A, a human; B, a rabbit; C, a kangaroo; or D, a three-toed sloth?
K: The answer is A. Do not wear out my patience. Otherwise, you run the risk of a horrible death at my hands.
RP: (Hesitates) ...Is that your final answer?
K: AAAARRRGGGH!!!!! I will not tolerate this any longer! Prepare to DIE!!!
(Kain envelopes Philbin. Muffled screams come from within.)
K: Is that your final answer, human? HmhmhmhmhahahhahAAAAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

THE END