Sorata stared at the frame of the badly beaten Cadillac, it needed lots of work, but he black mailed Kamui, Aoki, and Yuzu-chan into helping him. He had read about a ghetto car convention, and had wanted to join; thinking it would be an interesting experience for them all. Kamui showed up in a shirt and jeans, Aoki in jeans and a baseball shirt, Yuzu showed up with Inuki wearing a pair of overalls with sunflowers all over them and a white tee. Arashi came as well, looking rather un-interested.
"Great! Almost everyone is here!" Sorata smiled.
"Subaru said he'd rather sit and clap when we lost than help." Kamui said.
"Kusanagi san said he'd help if the Dragons of Earth weren't doing the same thing. They said they needed his help." Yuzuriah giggled.
"Karen said she had to work." Aoki shrugged. And so there they stood, the saviours of Earth, standing in a junkyard with a run-down Cadillac and a mission: to make the most ghetto car in existence. Sorata looked at Arashi, who was in her usual attire, a schoolgirl uniform.
"I can dictate." She said, glaring at any that looked as if they might object, nobody did.
"So! Let's get started!"
**Somewhere probably not too far away**
"We must beat the Dragons of Heaven!" Fuuma declared, slamming his fist into his hand for dramatic effect.
"Where do I come in?" Satsuki, in her usual attire, glared at the junkyard.
"You can do all the engineering, I suppose..." Fuuma sighed. Satsuki then disappeared into a big hole in the ground with lots of wires that are known as beast.
"I guess you need my brawn, not brain." Kusanagi sighed. Fuuma nodded. Seishirou appeared in an explosion of sakura blossoms.
"Whatever you want, NO!" He disappeared in the same explosion of petals and everyone acted like it hadn't happened.
"Kanoe, your job will be to sit on the car and look naked while it's being displayed, so we don't need you now." Yuuto shooed Kanoe away, then turned to Nataku, "You're looking for parts."
"Was that meant as a pun to my it-ness?"
"Ack! Not THOSE kind of parts!" Yuuto shook his head, "I mean, CAR parts!"
"Oh... You're not my daddy!" It pounced Fuuma.
"Nataku..." Fuuma warned in a parental voice, " Be a good little it and Daddy will let you test drive the car." This appeared to please Nataku so It nodded and Fuuma continued, "Anywho, Kakyouu can be our druggie in the trunk or the back seat." Everyone agreed that would be wise, and they began the work on the car.
--Two days before the ghetto car convention--
Because the author is lazy she skips to the day before the eve of the ghetto car convention.
"So, guys what do you think?" Sorata smiled with ghetto pride as the car had its finishing touches, a bass system that'd blow your brains out. The car was neon blue-purple, there was a chandelier hanging from where the car light used to be, fuzzy dice occupied the rhinestone covered mirror, the seats had leopard print seat covers, the front seats were very reclined, and they had hydraulics like you wouldn't believe.
"I think we might win, that's the ghetto-est car I've ever seen." Kamui sighed, rubbing at a spot from where he got some oil on this shirt.
"What should we name it?" Yuzu-chan asked, giggling in genki-ness. Everyone had to think about that...
"What about: Supah-stahhh!?" Aoki shrugged as he got weird looks.
"We could call it Ghetto-chan!" Yuzu hopped up and down, gleefully.
"Bob, perhaps?" Aoki tried again.
"NO!" Arashi stood from the couch she had been sitting in, "It shall be called--"
"Ghetto Queen Arashi!" Sorata smiled stupidly, then got hit.
"Not that either! It will be called: The Ghetto Mobile." Everyone agreed that the name suited the car, and it got "Ghetto Mobile" Written on the window in those ghetto/ Old English/ Mexican (if you live in Texas you know what I mean) letters.
The Dragons of Earth looked at their proudly ghetto car, thanks to Satsuki it was equipped with, not only anything every ghetto-licious-ly possible, it also had the latest technology. The back trunk opened and closed at the press of a button, to reveal: "Pimp Mobile" in neon green letters that went with the neon green exterior. Along with the neon green, the hubcaps had rhinestones, and they had the hydraulics down perfect. The inside had white shag carpeting, white fur on the ceiling, fuzzy dice, a stick shift made from a pimp cane, and a miniature disco ball where the ceiling light was. This car would make them all proud!
-Four hours before showtime-
(Behold the lazy-ness of the tired Krispy.)
"Come on Karen! We need a half-naked chick to sit on the car when it gets displayed!" Kamui whined, "I don't think they're going to get placed if I'm the only one sitting on the car.
"Ask Arashi!" Karen wasn't so easily swayed as Kanoe.
"Please Karen-san, we've worked very hard on this car." Aoki smile.
"Okay, for Aoki." Karen got up and went to look for her best lingerie. It was in somebody's room...
"Well then, now all we need is a 'Mac-daddy'..." Aoki laughed. Mac-daddy was a funny word.
"I'll be the pimpin' Mac-Daddy!" Sorata volunteered, "So long as Arashi will be my bitch!" Arashi got offended and slapped him.
"I think these pants will work" Yuuto handed Fuuma some too-big pants to put on Kakyouu. They nearly fell off, then they put an XXL Fubu shirt on the bony veggie-man. This was too perfect. They topped the outfit off by putting a beanie on his head, and Fuuma's extra pair of sunglasses. Then they mercilessly stuffed him in the back of the car. Kakyouu mentally noted that he felt violated. Fuuma dressed like that guy from the Yuzu sidestory then hopped in the car, with a robed Kanoe and a slutty looking Satsuki, and drove off to the Ghetto Car Convention.
"Byyyeeeee!" Sorata waved, and drove off, Karen and 'Ghetto-Uke-Bitch-Crossdressing-Kamui' in tow. Everyone waved, hoping the car would make them proud and at least place.
"Has anyone seen Subaru-san?" Yuzu asked, totally off-topic.
"No..."
-At the GCC (Ghetto Car Convention)-
Subaru twitched a little as he was commanded to 'back that ass up' for the tenth time that hour. He was getting used to it. He and Seishirou had been chosen to be judges in the contest, totally randomly when they had gone out for coffee.
"Subaru!" Seishirou walked over, "what did you give the 'Booty-licous?'" He sighed, he didn't like judging these stupid cars...
"Too much booty, not enough licous."
"Ah, so did you see their cars?"
"You mean Fuuma and Sorata's?"
"Yeah."
"Nope." Subaru looked around the near-vacant lot, there were only five cars there to judge, but the Booty-licous, the Crack Ho and the New Coast were pretty run-down from everyday ghetto use. Seishirou dragged his uke through the crowd of about thirty people, to see the Pimp Mobile and the Ghetto Mobile.
"You see, It's like a mergin' of da west siiiiide, and da east siiiide, and it's like Tupac and Biggie live, yo!" Gangsta Quatre was trying to explain the complexities of the name 'New Coast' to Sorata.
"Now Quatre, if you're a good little gangsta and leave that poor boy alone--" Trowa started.
"Yo! Shaddup, biach! 'Fore I pop you one!" Quatre re-arranged the gold chains around his neck as the judges came up. Wufei lay comatose in the backseat, dressed up like a duct-taped chicken with a crackpipe shoved into his... nose? Somebody must have missed. Duo sat on the car's hood in all his girly-boy glory, donning daisy dukes, and a tube top.
"That isn't a girl." Folken said, watching Dilandau spaz out in the back of their car, he was on LSD. Naria and Eyria were on their car, in their Zaibach uniforms, seeing as how they are already borderline indecent.
"Yea? Well eff you too, mo'fro!" Quatre shouted to Folken. Tenchi, with Aeika, Ryoko, Washu, Kiyone, Mihoshi and Katsuuhito were representing the Booty-licous. Grandfather was liking being 'Pimpin' Katsuuhito' for the day. They decided not to argue with Quatre.
"Yo! Pimpin' Q! Where's Hee-chan?" Duo asked, seeing as how nobody knew, he skipped off of the car and went to look for Heero in the girl's bathroom. "FOUND HIM!" Duo shouted back to Quatre, "HE'S JUST PASSED OUT!" Duo begain to drag the OD'ed Heero back to the car.
The D.O.E. and the D.O.H. had been watching this with amusement, as the attention turned to the Pimp-Mobile and the Ghetto-mobile, Subaru and Seishirou were happy Fuuma had talked Kanoe into wearing a bikini, they all knew she would've come naked if he hadn't made her. Satsuki was violating Kakyouu in the back seat. Kakyouu felt violated.
"What's so sexy about licking a veggie?" Karen asked Kanoe, getting creeped out. Kanoe shrugged, it wasn't doing anything for her either.
"Three hundred and it's a deal." Sorata grinned as Fuuma handed him then money, in cash, for Kamui.
"Please tell me you're kidding..." Kamui's eyes got bigger than normal when Sorata walked off and Fuuma stuffed him in the back seat with Satsuki and Kakyouu.
Subaru and Seishirou wrote the name of the car they liked best, and then announced the Ghetto Mobile and the Pimp Mobile had tied. The Crack Ho was engulfed in a white beam of light and disappeared. Ryoko teleported the crew of the Booty-licous back to their set, and the Gundam pilots threw Duo and the unconscious Heero in the back of their car and drove off, as the sound of police sirens began to get closer. A bunch of cop cars then began to chase the New Coast in a high-speed ghetto chase.
"So, shall we go?" Sorata asked, they all agreed, tossed Subaru in the trunk then drove off. Seishirou disappeared in a cloud of sakura petals, and Fuuma drove off, letting the trunk shine in all it's ghetto glory as Kamui screamed "RAPE" in the back seat.
"Pimp Mobile"
